


Brain Stew

by thisjabroni



Category: Hannibal (TV)
Genre: Blood, Braaains, Cannibalism, F/F, Gore, M/M, Murder, Smut, Violence, Zombies, chaptered fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-14
Updated: 2014-08-14
Packaged: 2018-02-13 03:55:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 30
Words: 47,682
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2136081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisjabroni/pseuds/thisjabroni
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jimmy doesn't remember much since the accident, he knows he lives in his brother's basement and attends his weekly support group for the reanimated. Adjusting to life as a zombie is way harder than he thought it would be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the [ Hannibal Summer of Rare Pairs](http://hannibal-summer-rare-pairs.tumblr.com/) Challenge.
> 
> For [Abbi](http://pricezellers.tumblr.com/) who i seriously cannot thank enough, you are a total treasure, If it wasn't for you this would never have gotten finished. Thanks for all the writing sessions and putting up with all my whining. You're always so supportive and it means so much! Also thanks to [Charli](http://eattheclones.tumblr.com/) who provided the motivational banners they were very much appreciated not to mention totally awesome. ily both lots, thanks luvs!
> 
> Get a cup of tea this is a long read i hope everyone enjoys it, and i would love to hear your feedback!

They met every Tuesday at three o’clock for two hours at the Princes’ community centre, it had been disused since the early nineties, now it was left to deteriorate and blend into the mess of overgrown weeds and trees outside. The smashed windows were boarded up, barring any sunlight into the building. The graffiti covered bricks would sometimes ask for a reaction from passers-by but for the most part it was forgotten about.

Inside a support group, meeting in an abandoned basketball court. It wasn’t ideal it made their voices echo and the air was stuffy, however it was the only room with working lights the others perched in perpetual darkness, left over arts and crafts and forgotten about books. The court floor was covered with chipped mossy green paints from the walls that now looked desperately scratched at. Everything here was falling apart, everything here was dead.

The group gathered into their usual semi-circle taking their preferred seats, they met early to beat the curfew imposed upon them, after ten they had to remain indoors until eight in the morning or face arrest. They followed the usual agenda, introductions were first, written onto pieces of paper and read out weekly. There memories were not as good as they used to be, some more so than others. If they had any new members it was good everyone was familiar with each other. They hadn’t of course, had anyone new join in a few months which they reasoned was only a good thing.

 

A man in his fifties stood up first, the chair legs scrapping across the floor as he pushed it back, none of the group flinched at the sound; it didn’t reach them anymore. He dug into his beige trouser pocket for the familiar piece of paper his brother had wrote for him. He read it out every Tuesday and by the same night he would forget what it had said.

 

“My name is Jimmy Price I was a history professor at the University of Maryland for twenty seven years. I never married, no kids. I now live with my brother who is better than me at everything.” Jimmy frowned realising his words, he must read that dumb line every week. “I am also a published author about some history stuff.” Again he paused allowing the stupidity of his brother to wash over him, did he write history books? He would have to ask Danny again.

 

“Three months ago I was driving home late from work when a truck hit my car, I went through the windshield of my 1978 maroon dodge magnum and was pronounced dead at the scene. Two days later I reanimated halfway through my embalmment.” Jimmy put the piece of paper back in his pocket whilst the rest of the group gave a monotone chorus of welcomes. He doesn’t remember the accident, doesn’t even remember owning that car. He knows it happened because Danny said it did, he knows it happened because he doesn’t have a pulse and the thick taste of formaldehyde in the back of his throat.

 

“Thank you Jimmy.” Freddie Lounds gave a curt smile, she was the leader of the group, sitting at the head of the semi-circle to survey everyone. Technically she shouldn’t be here, the reanimated were banned from meeting together, but rules had never stopped Miss Lounds before and they weren’t going to now. She had been a freelance journalist, mostly because she couldn’t work with anyone else. She had a tendency to get under the skin of everyone she met. 

She was well known and this was most likely her downfall. Her house was set on fire ten months ago, she just couldn’t remember why. All her research had been burnt along with half of her body. Jimmy didn’t look her way, it was hard to look at each other, the reanimated tended to have a problem with blinking, so even the simple task of looking at someone turned into ‘I’m staring into the depths of your missing soul’ stare.

 

After introductions were made they would talk, some weeks they wouldn’t say much. Just enjoy the company of being with each other in silence. The rest of the week was spent hidden away to avoid hurting the lifers’ sensibilities. The lifers did not shy away from letting their feelings known, they would scream abuse, throw things at them and even took to public burnings. This was Jimmy’s future now, slowly rotting away to nothing or waiting to be set alight. They had recently lost one of their members to a burning, Mason. Even for reanimated standards he was a strange one. The lower half of his face exposed and rotting away, whenever he spoke he would play with the flesh on his cheeks, twiddling it between his fingers. He never spoke of the why or how he came to be, rather he wanted to speak of his heritage and how proud he would make his Father. Freddie later informed the group Mason had been attacked by the pigs on his farm after his Father had pushed him into the pen. So much for fatherly love. His burning surprised no one, and they guessed the event had been arranged by his family. The group did not miss his presence.

“I want you all to try and remember.” Freddie began, she went to push her hair behind her ear, force of habit, before realising it wasn’t there anymore. She was often complimented on her flame curled hair, now it was melted to her scalp. “Start small, try and remember your introductions without reading your paper.” Jimmy was focusing on the floor, letting her words flow over him, he couldn’t hear that well since the accident. He looked to Beverly Katz, who was applying another coat of lipstick, how she got her formaldehyde fix, she took a bite from the ruby red before putting the lid back on.

“I just want to remember the asshole who did this to me.” Beverly pointed to her body, her left arm missing. “Cause when I do, I will kill him myself.” Jimmy smirked slightly as best as his scarred face could, it sagged a little on one side where he had landed on the wet concrete.

“Beverly, we do not appreciate those kind of threats.” Freddie reminded her, although her tone suggested she agreed with Beverly. “Lifers are not against us.”

“I hate them all,” Beverly muttered, crossing her arm over her chest.

“My wife would never hurt anyone.” Jack interrupted, he was the oldest of the group, a former cop. He brought the group to humility when talk turned sour. When threats against lifers started to bubble, Jack reminded them always of his wife Bella. His wife had stood by him though and Jimmy admired the both of them he was also jealous Jack had someone that cared for him, and didn’t force him to hide in a basement.

 “I know she wouldn’t Jack.” Beverly sank back in her chair, her black hair swaying behind her with the movement, “But your wife didn’t hack me to pieces and run off with my arm, I have every right to be mad at the ‘lifers’” She air quoted the word, as she would rather call them all a bunch of cunts. But Freddie had vetoed that.

Beverly looked like a rag doll, she was all stitched together and often brought sutures with her in case one of her stitches started to split, she used to work as a model, she wasn’t getting many offers these days. She reanimated four hours later, her head apart from her torso as she saw the back of the guy running out of the woods he dragged her in, holding her arm, she couldn’t do anything. It was another day before anyone found her.

“I still think you look very pretty.” Abigail barely spoke above a whisper, she was the youngest, still a teenager. She hadn’t told the group what had happened to her yet, her pale blueish skin lead them to believe she had drowned. But they would wait for when she was comfortable to talk about it.

“Thank you.” Beverly didn’t smile because she couldn’t so she patted Abigail’s arm instead, to anyone else they would have felt the cold flesh burning at them and immediately recoiled, but they felt nothing. Abigail smiled at her, if she could blush she would.

The group broke up at five, putting their chairs away in the basketball court.

“Remember we’re always looking for new members.” Freddie brushed the ash that had dropped from her body onto her skirt when she stood up.  It was difficult to invite new members to a support group that wasn’t permitted and the mere mention of it to anyone else could see them arrested. “I’ll see you all next week.”

In the summer they could walk home as it was still light outside, in the winter Danny would have to pick Jimmy up and drive him to their house, which Jimmy used to own himself. Jimmy walked home with Beverly as they lived close by, he never knew her before his accident, but over the last few months they had become friends.

“I will find him you know.” She was linking arms with Jimmy, he dragged his right leg behind him that was badly broken, it was snapped back to look straight but he couldn’t walk on it properly, and only added to the whole zombie aesthetic he was trying so hard to get away from.

“I know you will, I’ll help.” Jimmy promised.

“Get off the streets, freaks!” Some teens walked past shouting and laughing at them.

“Fuck off!” Beverly scoffed, unimpressed.

“Bev, they’re like thirteen.”

She shrugged lopsidedly. Jimmy walked her back to her house that she shared with her mother. The reanimated weren’t allowed to own their own houses and had to have an owner. Technically dogs had more rights than they did, but technically they shouldn’t even be here.

“Thanks Jim.” She kissed him on the cheek after helping her to the front door, Jimmy didn’t mind getting kisses from a model that was definitely new to him. Abigail was right Beverly still looked beautiful regardless.

Jimmy dragged himself home, Danny was waiting on the porch for him. The only family he had left was his twin brother, everything he had owned had gone to Danny after the crash. Now Jimmy lived in the basement of the house he worked so hard to buy, and all of his savings were now draining away at the hands of his twin brother.

“Hey champ, good meeting?” Danny was perpetually happy, and Jimmy was forever annoyed at him, even before the accident. Danny now just reminded Jimmy of how he used to look. Ash coloured hair that wasn’t clumpy and straw like. Amber eyes that weren’t clouded over and wide open. Skin that was warm with a pulse, not greying over and freezing to touch. Jimmy walked past his brother, pushing him aside and ignoring his comment. Danny didn’t know how to talk to his brother never did, but treating him like a child wasn’t helping.


	2. Chapter 2

When Jimmy had reanimated he had wandered out of what he assumed was a hospital into the street,  he felt odd, his arms and legs felt heavy like they paced four miles behind him. His mouth dry and burning, he doesn’t feel anything anymore though. It was only when he was grabbed from behind and thrown into the back of a white van did he realise that something was off. He spent his first day in the Reanimated Protection Unit that was run like a kennel. The reanimated were kept in cages until their owners came to collect them. If they were uncollected after seven days they were sent to the RPU testing facilities, essentially a prison. They were used as crash test dummies, their parts sold to science, most commonly their brains were taken out, killing them, but it helped the poorly funded researchers gain an understanding of why they had reanimated in the first place.  Luckily Danny had showed up on the third day to collect him and get him registered.

JP1045 was his registered number, he was issued his death certificate and an ID card of his reanimated credentials which he had to keep on his persons at all times. He had no basic human rights because he wasn’t human anymore, he had nothing but his shitty basement to sit in and try to remember his introduction that was written on a piece of paper.

“I am Jimmy Price….and.” He stopped and looked at the paper again, he didn’t even remember the first line properly.

His basement was small, with oak walls and flooring it used to store his vast wine collection but he wasn’t sure where that had gone. Now it had a bed, a table with a lamp. A few shelves with books that Jimmy must have owned. He tried reading one but kept forgetting what had happened in the previous chapter. He knew he was kept down there for the putrid odour, even though Jimmy had no sense of smell anymore. Danny would always pull away in disgust so it must have been bad, his brother always had a strong stomach and was not one to shy away. A TV was in the corner of the room, Jimmy would often watch nature documentaries and ignore his brother when he asked him why he was watching the one about bee’s again, when Jimmy hadn’t even watched that episode…or had he?

“Buddy, I’m staying at Eve’s tonight will you be ok?” Danny quirked one eyebrow up in question as he stood peering down into the basement, he didn’t want to go fully into the room it stunk. He would never get used to the smell, he had every brand of air fresher possible all over the house, and he often doused Jimmy in febreeze whenever he was near him.

“I’ll be fine.” Jimmy gritted through his teeth, annoyed at the interruption he didn’t even remember why he was standing up now.

“Okie-doke.” Danny replied, Jimmy let out a non-existent huff through his nose at his brother’s words. "

 

He waited for his brother to leave before grabbing a bottle of shampoo to drink. The formaldehyde slowed down the deterioration, he only needed to drink a few bottles a week and he was fine, no limbs falling off or gases from his body leaking out. Without a fix, the reanimated quickly begin to spoil, four days maximum and they turned into left over Halloween pumpkins. He finished his bottle and smoothed his hair back down on his head, which took to sticking up now it was forever dry and brittle. He smartened down his suit, straightening his tie looking at the wall, pretending there was a mirror there. Danny had asked if he wanted one, and Jimmy had refused he didn’t need a daily reminder of what he was. It was better to pretend that he still looked like Danny minus the mousey brown moustache that rested on Danny’s top lip. Jimmy cleared his throat again and willed himself to remember what he was supposed to be doing in the first place.

 

 

“You’re seeing your therapist, remember I told you about it yesterday.” They were in Danny’s silver Buick, Jimmy in the back covered in car fresheners, Danny had placed two tree air fresheners one either side of his brother’s ears. Jimmy stared out of the car window, this was the first time he had heard about any such appointment.

“You go every other week remember?” Jimmy didn’t answer him, he only hoped he smelled better after being doused in forest fresh, the summer was an unforgiving time for a zombie.

“Why am I seeing a therapist?”

“Government says so Buddy, you know to check you don’t have any…uh urges.” Danny pursed his lips together in a pout, something he often did when he couldn’t find the right words. Jimmy gave a nod, the trees dangling from his ears, he wasn’t sure what the urges were and he didn’t want to ask. He fought against looking at his reflection in the car window only to see people outside laughing and pointing at him.

The room was a stark white, almost clinical looking. The walls covered with rows of books and thick leather chairs adorning every corner. Jimmy slowly pulled himself inside, Danny was outside in the waiting area, reading some golfing magazine. The man seated behind the desk made no effort to get up or even look at Jimmy.

“Ah Mr Price, do take a seat.” He muttered, scribbling away with his pen. As far as first impressions go Jimmy thought this guy was a dick. Jimmy took a seat in one of the leather chairs sinking into it with a thump, the man finally looked up to Jimmy giving him an insincere smile. No doubt everything in this room was expensive, even his suit appeared to cost a fortune, and his douche of a therapist even had a designer beard.

“How are we feeling today, Mr Price.” The man took a seat opposite Jimmy, a pen and notepad in his hands.

“Have we met before?”

“Several times Mr Price, yes.” The man held an air of annoyance to him, like it physically drained him to talk to Jimmy.  The room must have been heavily fragranced because the man was not gagging, but still sat a distance away from Jimmy, just enough to hear him speak.

“My name is Dr Frederick Chilton, I have been your therapist for some time now, and one would have thought you would remember this by now Mr Price.” Jimmy felt his eyebrows crease down into the centre of his forehead, who the hell was this prick? Why didn’t he remember him?

“So how are you feeling?” Chilton tapped his pen three times on his notepad, hurrying Jimmy up, he wasn’t aware of how long these sessions ran for but suddenly felt the need to leave.

“I don’t feel anything.” Jimmy answered honestly, because he didn’t, he felt nothing physically or emotionally, he just was. When he got annoyed at Danny he waited for the sense of irritation to kick in, but it never did, akin to throwing a ball in the air and it never falling back down.

Chilton wrote something before looking up “Nothing at all? You don’t feel happy or sad?” Jimmy shook his head, focusing on the tie pin on Chilton’s blue tie.  “Do you feel any urges to hurt me?” Jimmy’s head shot up at that question, he’d never hurt anyone, never even been in a fight. Yeah he ran his mouth off a lot and emotionally damaged a few people, but physically hurt someone? That just wasn’t his nature.

“No.”

“Okay…” Chilton scribbled something else down. “Do you remember anything from the crash?” Jimmy shook his head again.

“Is there anything you would like to discuss, anything you’re confused about?” Chilton still wasn’t looking at Jimmy, he was instead checking the Rolex watch on his wrist.

“No.”

“Well Mr Price, that concludes another enthralling session, I’ll see you two weeks from now, see if you remember me next time.” Chilton gave him a self-satisfied smirk, clicking his pen off. Jimmy did feel the urge to punch him right in his bearded face then, he pulled himself up from the leather couch and walked over to Chilton’s desk. He picked up a silver frame with a picture of his therapist and another man. They had their arms resting on each other’s shoulders and one was dressed in fishing gear whilst Chilton stood in shorts and a T-shirt. They were both smiling and around them were five or six dogs jumping up into frame. His eyes stayed on the other man though, trying to test his memory, did he know him?

“My partner.” Chilton said from behind Jimmy peering at the same picture. Jimmy wondered if this so called partner was as big of a prick as Chilton was. “Cute.” Jimmy said with no hint of emotion placing the frame back on the desk. He probably picked it up every session and said the same thing.

It was past the curfew and Danny had left to work the night shift, he was a security guard but if anyone asked he said he was a cop. Jimmy was in his basement watching TV envious of his brother’s freedom to come and go as he pleased, to walk when it’s dark outside, and not scare the shit out of everyone. That was mostly why the reanimated had a curfew, the lifers felt unsafe otherwise, that somehow under the full moon the reanimated turned into flesh eating monsters and wanted to jump the closest lifer they found. Where really the reanimated could only walk a few meters at a time before stopping, they often dragged their limbs behind themselves. They weren’t fast nor could they claw open someone’s skin and feast on their organs. Sure they were some that came back and did horrible things to lifers, but that was mainly because they were horrible people in life, and now they all had a reputation.

Jimmy flicked through the TV, wondering what his usual Wednesday nights consisted of, did he mark work if he was a professor? Did he go on dates? Surely if he was dating someone they would have made an appearance by now, although why would they? Dating the dead was illegal, nor could they get married. If you’re better half should reanimate, you were no longer married, nor did you receive any of the benefits married life once provided. Plus you were no longer invited to your friends’ dinner parties.

The reanimated couldn’t sleep if it wasn’t for the curfew Jimmy could go out and do something with the usual eight hours he spent asleep. Since he couldn’t concentrate on reading he was usually stuck in front of the TV. Danny locked the door at the top of the stairs leading down to the basement as Jimmy used to sneak into his own living room to watch the TV, until Danny came home and caught him, screaming about how his ‘stinkin’ rotting corpse’ had ruined his best sofa. Now Jimmy was held prisoner in the basement until Danny got off from work. Maybe he should just put his head in the microwave, oh wait that’s upstairs in the kitchen.


	3. Chapter 3

Jimmy walked the block to the community centre with Beverly, it was ridiculously hot outside they knew they must have smelled horrific. A man walking towards them had stopped to throw up right in front of them. Beverly laughed in his face until one of her stitches popped open, making her laugh even harder. Jimmy was still laughing with her as they walked into the basketball court, drawing everyone’s attention. It was then that Jimmy noticed someone new, at least he thought he was, maybe he came here every week and Jimmy just forgot the guy.

Jimmy took his seat beside Beverly in the familiar basketball court, it was the only two hours of the week he genuinely looked forward to. Jimmy had agreed to help Beverly with her stitches, but his eyes were focused on the stranger. He was slouched in his seat, dressed from head to toe in black looking like a poster boy for hot zombies. He was the type of guy Jimmy would have lusted over in a bar, but never worked up the nerve to do anything about it. In other words totally out of his league. He guessed he was mid-thirties it was difficult to tell with the reanimated. His skin ashen and the circles under his eyes were darker than they would have been in life. His forehead creased with wrinkles as the glare on his face didn’t leave. There were no scars that Jimmy could see, he was wearing a leather jacket so it was hard to tell. It was only then he noticed the small white board hanging around his neck, it had a name written on it in red pen; _Brian._

“You’re staring.” Beverly said smugly, placing her arm into Jimmy’s open palm, wrist side up. Jimmy remembered what he was supposed to be doing _, ‘stitching Bev’s wrist, right.’_ Jimmy cursed his failing ability to blink. “You might be drooling over him actually.” He ignored her teasing, and began trying to thread the needle, which he sucked at even before his cognitive abilities went to hell.  Abigail took a seat beside Jimmy and took pity on him, taking the needle and thread and easily threading the needle.

“Thank you, you’re really good at that.” Jimmy gave her an uneven smile his best attempt so far he thought.

“No problem, I used to go fishing a lot with my Dad, got really good at threading the hooks.” She shrugged like it wasn’t a big deal, but Jimmy was impressed. Out of the group Abigail’s memory was the best, she remembered what she did that morning, she remembered events and meeting new people. She didn’t remember her accident though.

“Bev, I can’t do this if you keep moving.” Jimmy stuck his tongue out in concentration, he had no idea what he was doing, he stabbed her a few times but she didn’t noticed, his eyes straying to look at the stranger.

“Staring again.” Beverly sang, Jimmy thought she had a good voice but did this woman have no tact? So much for her not noticing. He pulled the stitch extra tight out of annoyance, she didn’t feel it.

“I’m not.” His eyes were still focused on Brian though, he couldn’t help it, he was drawn to him for some reason did he know him? Beverly cackled, drawing more attention to them. Jimmy playfully pushed her arm to get her to shut up.

Once the rest of the group took their seats, Freddie decided to get the meeting started, everyone caught between staring at the new guy and watching what Beverly and Jimmy were doing.

“Hi everyone I’m pleased you could all make it this week.” She smiled at them, her teeth a stark contrast to the rest of her burnt face. “We’ll start with the introductions shortly but first please welcome our latest member.” Everyone turned their gazes to the blasé stranger still slouched in his chair, he was staring at one of the broken basketball hoops. Freddie stood up and walked the short distance to the new guy. “Hi, I’m Freddie.” She offered her hand to shake, Brian as the name on the board said, slowly pulled his gaze away from the hoop to land on Freddie, giving her an unimpressed sneer, ignoring her crisp hand and left it to hang in the air. She snatched her arm back to her side, and huffed back to her seat. “Welcome to the group.” Freddie gritted through her teeth, the stranger leaned back in his seat making himself more comfortable. Jimmy stopped knitting with Beverly’s arm to look at Brian, why did the assholes always have to be good looking?

“Well…Brian.” Freddie punctuated his name with distaste. “We usually have a friend or relative write an introduction for us which we read to the group every week, it helps with the memory loss.” She rambled on, a hint of annoyance in her voice, she eventually gave up when Brian let his head roll back in boredom.

“We’ll start with the introductions then.” Freddie turned her back slightly so she wasn’t facing the left of the group anymore, she would kick that dick bag out if his attitude didn’t change. The others had forgotten about the activity she had gave them to do last week, they always did. Jack stood up holding the same piece of card he always read from.

“My name is Jack Crawford I was chief of police for forty years, word of warning when you go to bust a serial killer’s house make sure you bring back up.” He pointed to the gaping hole across his neck. It was his little joke, none of the group ever laughed. Jack talked about his wife Bella, how they never had children but they always had each other. It was sweet and the group always loved to hear Jack talk, he had a soothing voice, calm and steady.

The others made their introductions, Jimmy stumbled over his words as he kept risking a glance at Brian who was paying him no attention, he wanted to know everything about Brian and at the same time he wanted him to leave.

“Abigail, how has your week been?” Freddie asked, because Abigail did not like to introduce herself, did not want to stand up and tell the group her sorry tale.

“It’s been ok, my Dad still isn’t acknowledging me, but Mom says he’ll come around. I watched a really cool history documentary about Nicholas _II_ I thought you would have liked it Jimmy.” He gave her a smile, even though he had no idea who she was talking about. “My friend Marissa still isn’t allowed to come over, I waved at her when she walked past my house but she didn’t wave back.” Abigail bit her bottom lip, she usually only said a few words at the meetings and suddenly felt self-conscious about saying anything. If he heard her right, Jimmy thought she’d had an awful week she didn’t deserved to be ignored by her family and friends, he shook his head to himself he wanted to do more to help her, wanted to help them all but how could he, he was locked in a basement most the time. He looked over to the new guy again, he was pulling a packet of cigarettes out of his leather jacket along with a lighter. He singled one out with his teeth and put the rest back, taking the lighter he lit the cigarette and tried to take a drag from it.

“You can’t smoke in here.” Freddie immediately warned, trying to snap her fingers at him. The problem with the reanimated was they had a hard time accepting their bodies no longer functioned the way the used to, simple tasks like clicking fingers ending up with the fingers just limply flailing in the air. Brian took the red pen from behind his ear and lifted the board around his neck, he gripped the pen with a tight fist and started mashing the pen focusing on writing. The group all watched him, eyes wide and waiting, all the while the lit cigarette hung from his lips. He put the pen back behind his ear and turned it around for the group to read, they had to squint a little, and it looked like a child’s handwriting.

_What’s the worst that could happen?_

He had a point, Jimmy thought plus cigarettes were a healthy dose of formaldehyde, but the lacking ability to breathe was making smoking a moot point, this was just an old habit that Brian refused to give up.

“If he set’s fire to this place we’re all fucked.” Freddie snapped and then apologised as Abigail looked slightly shocked. Brian removed the cigarette to lick his lips, for a moment he looked like he was going to put it out until he gave Freddie a drawn out stare before trying to inhale from the cigarette again.

“PUT THE DAMN THING OUT!” Jimmy straight up jumped out of his skin, he was impressed he could still do that, he looked over to Jack who was trying to calm himself down after shouting. There was that chief of police voice then. Brian looked suitably shocked and finally put the cigarette out, rolling his eyes like a petulant teen being told off.

“Thank you Jack.” Freddie gave Jack a grateful smile as he cleared his throat, he would need an extra bottle of formaldehyde to try and eliminate the damage from yelling, and Bella would no doubt be upset at him for getting so wound up.

 “Okay everyone, pair up.” Freddie announced, they did this every week, allowing members of the group a chance for one to one support. Which they vastly lacked being locked away into a room of their houses. It gave them a chance to talk to another person without a whole group watching them. They got up shuffling around to find the partner they wanted to talk to. Abigail would pair up with Freddie they always enjoyed talking together, and Abigail found her confidence and self-esteem was boosted every time they did pair work. Beverly usually sat with Jimmy and Jack tagged along too since they were an odd number. Today though Beverly got up and Jimmy instantly stopped her.

“Where are you going?”

“To talk to Jack.” She tried to move again but Jimmy grabbed her arm gently.

“What about me?” He sounded pathetic, he didn’t care.

“Go talk to the new guy.” She strutted off, the new guy she was speaking of had not moved from his seat and was still scowling away. “You’ll thank me.” She winked at Jimmy who narrowed his eyes at her. He looked at Brian, and read the message on his white board again, ‘what’s the worst that could happen?’ Well for starters this guy was too good looking for his own good and his whole attitude stunk more than he probably did. Jimmy wouldn’t know he just imaged him smelling amazing and that wasn’t helping matters. Jimmy couldn’t work Brian out, he felt irritated by him, couldn’t work out if he was infatuated with him or hated his guts.

Brian scratched at the stubble on his jawline before folding his arms over his chest, making no effort to move, the rest of the group were deep in their own discussions, and Jimmy was still debating whether or not to walk over. Why didn’t he talk? Was it the reason he reanimated?  Or did he think the group were so far beneath him they didn’t deserve to be spoken to? Jimmy had balled his hands into fist until he decided what’s the worst that can happen right? He stood up and dragged himself over to where Brian was sitting, he took the empty seat next to him. If Jimmy focused on how much this guy annoyed him he would be fine, if he stared at him long enough he felt his resolve starting to fade.

“Hey, it’s Brian right?” Jimmy didn’t hold out his hand to shake, he wasn’t going to be humiliated like Freddie was. He watched as Brian grabbed the red pen from behind his ear and began writing something, Jimmy waited until the white board was turned towards him.

_Bite me._

Brian stood up, tipping his chair over making a loud clanking sound as it hit the floor everyone stopped what they were doing to look over at them. Brian walked out, it was a faster pace than how most of them walked, but it still had a sluggish movement to it.

“Woah, swing and a miss Jim, what did you say?” Beverly was half teasing but Jimmy was not in the mood. It was official, he hated Brian.


	4. Chapter 4

“I just don’t want them living in our community, I think they’re disgusting they should be put in the ground.” Danny nodded at Eve, she was drinking her third glass of wine, and Danny was more interested in her cleavage then anything she was saying.  “They are violations of nature, just biding their time until they attack us, they should be handed over to the RPU.”

“Exactly, get rid of them all.” Danny mumbled, he was running kisses up Eve’s arm to try and get her to shut up or change the subject.

“I’m pleased you feel the same way, maybe I should start a petition to ban zombies living here, and you’d help me right? She smiled at him, voice as sweet as sugar and Danny was hooked.

“Sure, say how about we take this some place more comfortable.” He gave her a wink, she downed her drink and let herself be helped from the couch by Danny. They both paused when the front door swung open, the stench hit them first making them gag then they saw Jimmy dragging himself in. Eve let out a scream that could curdle milk, both her hands in her looking like an extra from a B-horror movie. She pulled away from Danny, who was already trying to get her to calm down but she wasn’t staying, she ran out of the house. “I’ll call you.” Danny shouted down the street as she fled.

 “Well thanks a lot Jimmy.” Danny sneered, pulling his brother further into the house and slamming the door shut. “Cock-blocked once again.”

“Not now, Danny.” He didn’t need this, not after his five minute crush would rather leave than talk to him, or at least write on that stupid board.

“No fuck you, you’re lucky you even have a roof over your damn head, I could phone the RPU right now Buddy, get you out of my hair once and for all.” Jimmy let Danny whine at him, he often did this when he wasn’t getting laid, about to get laid, or planning on getting laid. He stomped his way down to the basement and heard Danny slam the door shut at the top locking it. Looked like curfew now started at six.

Jimmy didn’t bother changing, it’s not like it made him smell any better. He wore the same suit every day, mostly because he had no idea where Danny had put his clothes. He slumped onto his bed switching the television on. He needed a distraction his argument with Danny left him on edge, he didn’t have the chemical balance within to get angry at his brother. Before the accident Jimmy and Danny rarely spoke, they had never been close and Jimmy always resented the favouritism shown by their parents towards Danny. Once his thoughts escaped from Danny they landed on Brian, normally by now the events of the meeting were slowly disintegrating he would start to forget what he had said, but he couldn’t stop replaying Brian walking off and why it bothered him so much.  

 

Danny left his brother down there to rot for six days, he had been caught up at work before he remembered his zombie brother under the stairs. He opened the door and gagged at the smell, bowling him over.

“Jimmy! Get your ass up.” He coughed over his words, grabbing two cans of Febreeze. When Jimmy finally reached the stop of the stairs Danny immediately sprayed him down until the cans ran out. “Go sit outside, air out a bit, you reek.” He grimaced, shoving Jimmy to the door until he was out on the porch. It was a much cooler day and Jimmy shielded his eyes in the sun, he was pleased to be out of the basement, he had no idea how long he had been down there for, had he missed any of his meetings? He sat on the lawn letting his fingers weave through the grass, he used to love the smell of cut grass, the memory made him smile something he actually remembered about himself.

“Woah you smell like a landfill had diarrhoea.” Danny’s eyes were watering when he sat down on the porch. “Sorry about that champ, just been busy with work, you were alright down there though?” Jimmy didn’t move, he wasn’t going to agree with his brother lest he just left him down there until he was bones. “It won’t happen again.” Danny promised, Jimmy knew it would, he couldn’t remember if it had happened already.

“This is rough on me too you know that right?” Jimmy bit back a reply he could feel the snide remark cutting at his ribs, but held it in. “You really scared Eve, she even called the RPU.” Eve wasn’t Danny’s wife, she was his secretary who he had been having an affair with all throughout his marriage. His wife took the kids and left him a few years ago but Eve hung around, they still didn’t admit they were a couple though it was more of an open relationship and Eve got to spend all of Danny’s inherited money from Jimmy. 

“Are you….are you handing me over?” Jimmy’s voice was broken, quiet and accepting of his fate. He couldn’t fight against the RPU.

“What? No.” Danny’s eyebrows creased down shaking his head. “I made her hang up, apologised told them it was a prank call. Danny was picking at the wood on the porch, he never knew if he was doing the right thing, he could never please anyone.

“Thanks.” Jimmy finally replied, he didn’t turn around to acknowledge his brother, he didn’t sound sincere.

“You should talk more Jimmy.”

“I have my support group for that.”

“I meant to me.” Danny mumbled, staring at his brother’s back which was hunched over, he could see Jimmy’s hair clinging to his scalp. He was gruesome to look at, it took will power to look at him most of the time.

“There’s nothing to say Danny, we never talked before any of this happened, why should we now?” Jimmy turned around slowly, tilting his head on the side to look at the disappointment written on his brother’s face. “Dogs get treat better than this, so don’t pretend your brother of the fucking year Danny okay?” He turned back to look at the street, mothers were ushering their children indoors as they saw Jimmy sat there like rotting road kill.

“You can stay out here for ten minutes then you’ll have to come back in before someone calls the RPU.” Danny muttered, Jimmy never heard him, he closed his eyes and relaxed in the sunshine, letting his odour poison the street.

 


	5. Chapter 5

Jimmy was slowly sinking more into the leather chair as he watched his therapist leisurely pace up and down his office. He was talking to someone on the phone completely oblivious to Jimmy’s presence.

“I’ll be home late tonight, yes I know that but it’s not my fault.” Jimmy followed his movements, almost as if it could send him to sleep, which of course it wouldn’t. “These matters don’t concern you Will, yes in the office.” Jimmy didn’t even have to strain to hear the conversation, Chilton was quite vocal to the guy on the other end of the line. He could even hear this Will guy shouting at the other end. “No I’m not fucking him….he works for me.” Chilton stopped pacing, Jimmy was having a hard time understanding what the hell was going on. As first impressions go this guy was just plain rude. “No I know, look I’m sorry okay I’ll try and get home as soon as I can. Look I’ve got to go I’ve got a brainer waiting.” Jimmy looked up, was that him? He was a brainer? He’d never heard that expression before or even what it meant. Chilton put down the phone on his desk with a thump, he cracked his knuckles and inhaled deeply, letting the phone call go over his head.

“Mr Price.” Chilton mumbled as a form of greeting, he grabbed a pen and his notebook from his desk and took the seat opposite Jimmy.

“Mr Price, you worked for many years a history professor is this correct?” The man seated across from him, did not lift his eyes from the notepad he was furiously scribbling in.

“Aren’t you going to apologise?” Jimmy flummoxed, then pen in Chilton’s hand halted as he looked to Jimmy a quizzical look on his face.

“Why exactly would I do that Mr Price?”

“For the phone call.”

“That was none of your business Mr Price, so if you will please answer the question.” Jimmy lacked the ability to feel, but the hostility in the room sure hit him hard in the face.

“I’m not sure.” Jimmy scrunched up his brows in thought, trying to force himself to recollect.

“Don’t hurt yourself Mr Price.” He scoffed clicking the top of his pen. Jimmy watched the motion, how this guy was a licensed therapist he would never know. Chilton stood up from his chair and began to pace the room, asking Jimmy questions that only Chilton remembered asking him before, he more or less got the same answers. Jimmy didn’t remember his accident, he didn’t feel anything and he had no urges to hurt anyone.

“You still don’t remember me Mr Price?” Jimmy shook his head, he would know if he had met this guy, how could he forget such an arrogant face, the short temper, the unprofessional mannerism in which he worked. Chilton stopped mid pace and checked the time on his watch, he walked over to his desk and grabbed the picture frame that was sitting there. He returned to his seat and looked Jimmy up and down scrutinizing him. He passed the picture over to Jimmy, careful of keeping his distance. Jimmy took the image and stared at it confused.

“Every week you pick up the picture and ask me a different question, who is the other man? How many dogs do we own, do I fish too? Yet you never remember.” Jimmy didn’t of course have a clue what Chilton was talking about.

“Is this the person you were talking to on the phone?” Jimmy asked staring at the man beside Chilton in the photograph.

“Another question then,” Chilton let out a sigh of utter boredom. “Since you won’t remember, the answer yes it was, he believes I am sleeping with my secretary.” Chilton shrugged, dusting off some imaginary dust from his knee.

“Are you?” Jimmy asked, he didn’t know who was playing therapist to who now, but it was better than discussing his so called life.

Chilton waited a beat, thinking it over before giving Jimmy another shrug. “Yes, I am.”

Jimmy looked at the picture again, the other man looked so thrilled in the picture, holding up a fish he had caught, giving the camera a huge grin, Jimmy almost felt bad for him.

“Then it’s not me that needs a therapist.”

“No Mr Price, you need a mortician” Chilton got up from his seat, pulling the frame harshly out of Jimmy’s grip. “I’ll see you in a fortnight Mr Price.” He said through gritted teeth, showing Jimmy the door. He limped out into the waiting area to see his brother asleep, limbs sprawled over two chairs. He shoved Danny hard to wake him up, causing him to scream when he saw Jimmy hovering above him, his shrill had alerted the secretary to come over and see what the fuss was.

“Gentlemen, is there a problem?” He was holding a can of mace, aimed firmly at Jimmy’s face, as he rolled his eyes almost daring him to do it.

“Matthew,” They all turned to look at Chilton standing at the doorway of his office. “Book his next session.” He dismissed the secretary who only nodded at him. Jimmy watched him closely, repeating everything he had just been told whilst watching Matthew go back to the desk to type out an appointment for Jimmy. By the time Matthew had come back to hand over the card Jimmy had forgotten his name

 

Jimmy was sitting on the front lawn again, Danny had been allowing him the privilege of ten minutes lawn time, due partly to guilt and also his intention to improve their relationship.

“You mean if I try real hard at school and eat all my greens I can sit outside like a real boy?” Jimmy mocked, clasping his hands close to his chest, his brother pushed him outside onto the lawn and set the sprinkler on.

“Have fun asshole.” Jimmy laid back on the grass, spreading his arms as wide as they would go, the prickle of the grass going unnoticed against his skin. He knew he couldn’t lie there all day, the lifers just couldn’t help themselves once they spotted a reanimated on the street, it wasn’t one before one walked past Jimmy’s front lawn, the smell stopping him in his tracks. He had a look of disgust on his face and was saying words that didn’t reach Jimmy’s ears, eventually he got bored and threw his sandwich straight in Jimmy’s face, a tomato sliding down his cheek.  Can’t a zombie just sunbathe in peace?


	6. Chapter 6

Jimmy remembered his support group, he didn’t hit a wall in his memory when remembering their names, they were his friends or as close to friends as he would get. As he didn’t sleep it was hard to distinguish the days of the week, Danny would cross each day off the calendar for him and circle the days when his meetings were. Every two weeks a blue mark appeared on a Wednesday, but Jimmy didn’t know what they were for. He remembered more about the group than himself lately. His brother had asked that morning why he remembered his support group and not his therapist, Jimmy didn’t know how to answer that.

“Where’s Abigail?” Something had been off about the group the minute Jimmy had taken his seat next to Beverly. He had gauged the group letting them introduce themselves first, trying to figure out what was wrong.

“I don’t know Jimmy.” Freddie looked around the group to see if they knew where she was. They all returned an unknowing shrug.

“She’s usually here, right?” Jimmy asked, because he couldn’t remember if she had missed a meeting, but he was sure she never had.

“Yes, usually but I’m sure she is fine—“

“You don’t know that,” Jimmy interrupted, voice darker and breaking slightly. “She could have been attacked in the street.” Jimmy was getting agitated and the others were watching him closely, even Brian who usually lacked interest in what anyone had to say was watching him.

“Jimmy, her mom drops her off here remember.” Beverly reassured him. Jimmy reluctantly let the issue go, it still didn’t sit right with him. Nothing for the reanimated was ever that simple, he knew something was wrong but he couldn’t do anything about it.

“Are you okay Jimmy?” He turned to glare at his friend, was she really asking him that?

“You know what I mean, you look worse than usual.” Beverly shoved a fly that was buzzing around her head away. “When was the last time you drank anything?” Jimmy had no idea, she frowned hard at him. Beverly grabbed her bag and pulled out a bottle of body lotion handing it over to Jimmy. “You need to take care of yourself Jim.” He uncapped the lid and downed the contents, not even daring to glance a look at Brian, if Jimmy was trying to cling onto any shreds of remaining like an adult, it had just gone, he now sat like a baby with a bottle being cooed at by Beverly, who sat smugly.

 

 

“Brian,” Freddie announced turning to face him, his name one again written in red Ink on the board, he turned slowly to face her. “Do you want to introduce yourself?” To Jimmy’s surprise Brian took the red pen from behind his ear, he wiped the board clean with his jacket sleeve and began writing, it wasn’t long before he turned the board around.

_No_

Jimmy rolled his eyes, of course not. Freddie let out a sigh, “We need more members.”          

“That’s a terrible thing to say Freddie.” Jack was battling with the heat, he was drinking bottle after bottle to remain sitting up. His speech was slow and he sounded angrier at Freddie than he really was.

“I’m just saying is all.” She looked offended, it was her group after all if they were caught she would be the one off to the testing facilities the rest just having to spend a few days in the kennels. Freddie heard a tapping sound if she could feel irritated she would have snapped at the person doing it, instead she turned slowly to face them. “What?” He tapped his board at her, imploring her to read it whilst he sat back bored.

_I could find us new members_

She read it a few times, giving the others a chance to read over it too.

“How?” She decided to indulge him. Brian squeezed the pen in his fist and started writing again.

_Cemetery_

It was widely known that the reanimated often hung around there, maybe to enjoy the silence or just to feel closer to home.

“We’d get caught.” Jimmy decided to be the voice of reason because Freddie and Beverly were looking at each other quit eagerly about the sudden notion of going on an adventure. He felt his attention being pulled by the same tapping noise, he stared at the board tilting his head on the side to understand what Brian had drew on it.

“I don’t….I don’t even know what that is meant to be.” Jimmy squinted his eyes.

“It’s a chicken.” Jack sat back pleased he figured it out.

“Are you calling me a chicken?” Jimmy voice was laced with distain, Brian nodded his head, with a cocky grin.  He heard Jack laughing slightly to himself. “Are you going?” Jack stopped laughing and shook his head. “I’m not that stupid” If Jack got caught they would send him away, he was in a bad state and they were often looking for more decomposed reanimated bodies to study, he couldn’t risk it.

“Come on Jimmy, we’ll be back before anyone even notices we’ve left.” Freddie gave him a crisp smile. He turned again at the tapping, he seriously wanted to stick that pen down that guy’s throat.

_I know a shortcut._

Maybe it was because Jimmy still had a crush on Brian, regardless of his asshole behaviour and when he looked from the board to his face, the smugness that usually sat there had dissipated. Or maybe it was because Brian kept pushing for Jimmy to go but he finally nodded his head. Freddie and Beverly high fived each other as gently as possible, Jimmy only hoped they didn’t get caught, Danny would skin him.

 

“Are you sure Jack will be okay?” Jimmy asked for the third time, they were walking down the back streets, away from the lifers taking any alleyways that they faced, Brian was leading the way and he seemed confident about where he was heading so the group didn’t question him.

“Yes.” Beverly told him again, they had left Jack at the community centre he would have to wait for Bella to pick him up. They weren’t exactly making fast time, they had to stop every few minutes to rest for a while, and they were all feeling the effects of walking in the sun for a long time. Freddie’s charred skin was leaving a trail behind her, she was linking arms with Jimmy, Beverly linking his other arm, trying to help him walk.

“Maybe we should just cut that that leg off Jim.” Beverly cackled. “We could match, start a missing limb club.” Jimmy ignored her and focused on trying to walk, Brian stopped to turn back and look at the sorry group of misfits that were following him. He took his pen and wrote on the board.

_Nearly there_

His gaze lingered on Jimmy for a second too long as the air tensed around them, before turning around to face forward.They followed after him, Beverly and Freddie getting more excited, how they should really do this more often, all the while Jimmy was trying to work out what that look was all about.

What was a leisurely five minute stroll took them half an hour but they still made it. Beverly and Freddie dropped Jimmy down on a hill to rest, whilst they started exploring the grounds. Jimmy watched Brian he could see him debating whether to follow the other two or sit with himself. He didn’t look particularly pleased about either option, Jimmy let that war wage on, as he took advantage of being outside and laid back on the grass, smiling to himself. He eventually felt a presence sit down beside him, he guessed Brian had lost his battle.

Jimmy could hear Beverly and Freddie laughing, there didn’t seem to be anyone about other than them, it was peaceful, he felt welcomed here. He turned his head to see Brian lighting up a cigarette, he offered the pack to Jimmy. He slowly sat up and pulled a cigarette from the packet. Was he a smoker? Did it really matter now? Not that long ago he had drank a whole bottle of body lotion. He placed the cigarette in between his lips and watched as Brian flicked open his lighter, allowing the flame to sit between them before moving closer to light the cigarette, it was a quick movement but Jimmy felt his face blush even though it couldn’t.

“Thanks.” He finally said, trying to inhale the damn thing, but he couldn’t instead he just tried to swallow the fumes down.

The silence between them wasn’t uncomfortable, it was easier to not ask any questions Jimmy still somehow remembered the chair incident and he didn’t want to piss the guy off again. Brian laid back on the grass, stretching himself out like a cat, his arms above his head, his black t-shirt riding up slightly, Jimmy couldn’t pull his heavy gaze away, he didn’t know why he was so interested in the ashen skin, it was bruised and decaying like his, but Jimmy still followed the treasure trail down with his eyes. If his gaze had been elsewhere he would have noticed the cuts on Brian’s wrists. Jimmy thought he had gotten away with his not so subtle staring but Brian noticed however once he stopped stretching, and Jimmy immediately pulled his gaze in front of him. He sat waiting for Brian to get up and punch him or storm off but it never happened, instead he heard the tapping sound.

_Dream on_

That was fucking it, Jimmy flicked the cigarette away and tried his best to make a dramatic exit, he had no chair to flip or the grace to walk, but he wasn’t sitting with this bastard a second longer, he heaved himself away to find Beverly and Freddie who hadn’t gotten very far, they were sitting together on a fountain, looking at the their reflection in the water, they turned when they heard Jimmy.

“What is wrong with you?”

“Did you find anyone? Can we go now?” Jimmy said through gritted teeth.

“We’ve not looked yet, we were waiting for you and lover boy to finish smoking like a couple of stowaways.” Freddie and Beverly both laughed whilst Jimmy felt the closest thing to anger in months.

“I’m going.” Jimmy turned to leave but Brian stopped him in his tracks, gripping his arm.

“We’ll take a quick look then go.” Freddie reasoned and Jimmy yanked his arm out of the vice like grip that held him in place, his skin tore but he didn’t feel it.

“You two go that way and we’ll take this side then meet up, it’s quicker.” Beverly ignored the scowl being thrown at her from Jimmy.

“I’m not going anywhere with him.” Jimmy spat, pointing a finger at the person in question, he rolled his eyes and Jimmy wanted to poke them out. He started to follow the direction Beverly had told him to walk, hoping she was following behind him, when he turned around to check both she and Freddie were gone and Brian was following him at a safe distance.

Jimmy stopped and waited until Brian was a step away from him. “What is your problem?” He waited for Brian to write on his board.

_I was joking_

“You’re an asshole.”

_I’ve heard that before_

The corners of Brian’s mouth turned up into a sly smile, and Jimmy didn’t know whether to punch or kiss that look from his face. He turned to keep walking, he didn’t think he would ever long for the privacy of his basement. Jimmy couldn’t find it within him to argue anymore and carried on his search with Brian walking instep beside him.  The silence lasted only a few minutes more, they hadn’t gotten very far at all Jimmy was starting to worry about his leg, it dangled below him as if tied by thread, to anyone else it would make them gag. His self-pity was quickly disturbed by the shrill scream piercing the cemetery.

 “Beverly.” Jimmy panicked, and Brian was already running off in the direction of the scream, he knew it was her but Jimmy couldn’t get to her fast enough. He trailed his leg behind him, and now wished he had carried through on Beverly’s joke and cut the damn thing off. His vision began to swim as he pushed his body further, the reanimated were not meant to expel energy, and Jimmy trying to run was not only laughable but downright exhausting for him. He was nearer the water fountain and could see three figures standing there, he hoped it was his group and not lifers. He was about to shout out to Beverly when someone grabbed him from behind, shoving a rough hand over his mouth.

If he could panic he would, if he could have kicked and punched his way out of the grip he would have, with no endorphins running through his body to give him the upper hand he was calm enough to noticed the arm holding him, it was wearing a leather jacket. He felt himself being pulled back behind a tree to watch what was going on in front of them, he waited for his vision to become clear. He looked to Brian who was scribbling away on the board.

_Stay here_

Jimmy just nodded, and watched as Brian walked over, his hands held up in front of him, it was only then that Jimmy noticed one of the figures had a gun.

“Who are you?” She shouted at him, of course Brian couldn’t answer that question without lowering his arms to write on his board, she pointed the gun further in his face and Jimmy decided hiding behind a tree was not how he was going out so he grabbed the tree trunk and pulled himself up shouting.

“We’re not here to cause trouble.” Jimmy slowly raised his hands too, he didn’t want to fight with a lifer they would always win. He tried not to stare at her and frighten her enough to pull the trigger on the gun. Her skin looked radiant in the afternoon sun, her face flushed, she looked out of place here she was the odd one out.

 “Please don’t shoot anyone.”

“What are you doing here?” She didn’t lower the gun and her tone was harsh, straight to the point she wasn’t here for pleasantries.  

“We, just came to find people like us.” Freddie spoke up she was sitting next to Beverly on the ground beside the fountain.  The woman turned to point the gun at Freddie as she spoke, Brian stood in front of Jimmy, almost as if he was protecting him but Jimmy shoved that notion off, trying to focus on the gun’s movements.  

 “Which is what?” The gun toting stranger asked, she was now circling them, making sure she had a target on all of them.

 “Reanimated.” Freddie replied and the woman finally lowered her gun.

“Well then I guess you found one.”


	7. Chapter 7

“Alana.” She introduced herself, as the rest hesitated unsure, they were dumbfounded had she meant it? “Follow me.” No one moved, they should be heading back to the community centre.

“Where to?” Freddie asked, standing up from the ground, she looked briefly to the gun that Alana had now lowered to face the ground.

“My house is up there, “She pointed to the hill, where a small cottage was. “It won’t take that long.” Freddie looked to the others for their permission.

“What about Jimmy’s leg?” Beverly asked gratefully accepting the hand that Alana held out to pull herself up. Alana turned to look at Jimmy who was still half hidden behind Brian, she motioned him with her hand to move out the way, he gave a huff before standing aside. Jimmy felt oddly touched by the gesture.

“I can fix that.” She gave him a smile which Jimmy returned. “We need to get moving though.” Alana looked anxious to get them away from the cemetery, they obviously had questions to ask her but this wasn’t the place. Brian turned to look at Jimmy a question on his face that Jimmy didn’t not have the mind reading abilities to understand, annoyed Brian just grabbed Jimmy and hefted him over his shoulder into a fireman’s lift. Jimmy half dangling down his back.

“Put. Me. Down.” Jimmy said as patiently as he could, the rest laughing at him except for the man carrying him.

Beverly stopped cackling to put on a more sincere face. “Jimmy this will be quicker, your leg is in pretty bad shape.” He nodded, but then remembered she couldn’t see his face from this angle.  “Besides we’ll think you’ll enjoy it.” She started cackling again and before Jimmy could get a word in they were moving.

Alana was leading the way to her house, aiming her gun out in front of her, it made the others tense and an air of silence surrounded them, other than the crunch of the ground below them. Jimmy was trying hard to prevent his face from smacking repeatedly into Brian’s ass, he had tried to explain but Brian ignored him which was not really a surprise.

“You can’t tell anyone about this place.” Alana suddenly stopped and turned to face the others who nodded their heads. “I mean it, don’t tell your family or your friends, no one.” She warned them sternly, gripping her gun harder and they all quickly nodded at her. She motioned to them to follow after her as she unlocked the door to her house, she ushered them all in and locked the door shut again.  A dog came through to the entrance wagging its tail.

“Don’t mind her,” Alana said, bending down to stroke the dog. “Applesauce is harmless.” They all seemed reluctant to touch the dog, animals did not like the reanimated, dogs barked, cats screamed at them like they’d been struck with hot pokers.  Beverly was the first to reach out and pet the dog, who licked her hand in greeting, Beverly then sunk to the floor to play with the dog more.

“You are the cutest, yes you are. You are so cute.” With Beverly preoccupied, Brian finally placed Jimmy into a vertical position.

“Thanks, I guess.” Jimmy mocked, flattening his suit down that had ridden up whilst riding Brian’s back. The house was quaint, Jimmy guessed Alana had inherited the house from a grandparent, it was vintage and not in a retro cool way, but vintage as in nothing here had been redecorated since the 50’s. Jimmy liked it.

“Come through to the kitchen.” Alana called, the others followed the sound of her voice, she was busying lighting the fireplace. “Take a seat make yourself at home.” Her gun had been put away, but Jimmy felt no less nervous. She had still locked them all in here and they still had no idea why she had dragged them here in the first place.

“Take a seat.” Alana pointed at the big oak dining table as she went about gathering pots and taking meats out from her fridge. Jimmy sat down next to Freddie, and Brian took the seat opposite him, staring oddly at him. Jimmy had no clue what he had done this time. Beverly eventually walked into the kitchen, Applesauce following behind her. Alana chopped the meat into thick chunks and threw them all in a pot, and shoved it in the oven.

“I’m sorry I didn’t catch any of your names.” Alana didn’t stopped what she was doing, but gave them a smile over her shoulder.

“I’m Beverly, that’s Freddie. Those two are Brian and Jimmy.”

“Hey,” She welcomed them, filling up a tea pot of water, Jimmy watched as she opened an unlabelled jar of red dust and put four tablespoons into the pot, she stirred it four times and placed it over the stove.

“Are you going to tell us what we’re doing here, it’s not just for a spot of tea” Freddie cut to the chase, it was all well and good playing house maid, but Freddie had to get her group back home safely without being caught.

“Freddie, stop being so rude.” Beverly muttered, taking a seat beside Brian.

“No she’s right.” Alana granted she was still busying herself over the stove. “You’re not just here for tea, there’s food too.” Jimmy watched as Beverly leaned her head in her only hand, a look of amazement on her face watching Alana. Jimmy let out a laugh and Brian gave him a questioning look, Jimmy gestured to Beverly with his eyes, as Brian followed his gaze and nudged her slightly.

“What?” She asked, broken out of her trance.

“You’re staring,” Jimmy mocked totally loving having the upper hand. He heard tapping and he looked to see what Brian had written on his board.

_Practically drooling_

Jimmy started laughing, it was a screechy and it sounded weird even to his own ears, until he realised he hadn’t laughed like that for a long time. He watched Beverly shove Brian so hard his chair wobbled.

“You two can piss off.” She muttered, trying not to laugh, she had been looking at Alana a little too closely, she had piercing blue eyes that Beverly found herself staring into, but they couldn’t blame her she was beautiful.

Freddie kept watching the clock in the kitchen tick away as Alana poured out five cups of tea into delicate tea cups. She placed the tray down in front of them, grabbing a cup and adding an extra red cube into the drink, stirring it a few times with a teaspoon.

“Jimmy, yours has a little something extra to help your leg.” She passed him the cup who looked uneasy at the contents.

“We can’t drink this.” Jimmy finally said looking away from the drink and he would need more than tea to fix his leg.

“You can, I drink it often enough and I’m fine…better than fine.” She trailed off, Jimmy wasn’t sure what she meant, he watched the others receive their cups and stare at them.

Alana took a sip from hers, smiling slightly. “You’ll like this trust me.” Beverly drank hers first.

“It’s different.”

“It’s no earl grey yes,” Alana grinned. “You’ll grow to like it though.” She watched the others take their first sips. Jimmy drank the hot liquid at first it tasted of nothing, he couldn’t tell if it was hot or cold. But after his third sip he could feel a warmth spreading on his tongue, it tasted earthy with a slight sweet kick for an aftertaste. He downed the rest of the drink quite quickly. He watched Brian swiped his tongue along his lip catching the last drop, Jimmy felt his face heat but blamed the tea.

“Good?” Alana gave a laugh at the very pleased faces sitting in front of her. “Okay well you’re going to love this.” She got up to stir the pot in the oven, stroking applesauce who was asleep on the floor. “Should be about another five minutes.” 

“We really need to get going.” Freddie reminded them, she drank her tea and had played a polite guest but was getting bored. 

“You can leave if you want…“

“It’s Freddie.” She reminded her bluntly.

“Freddie,” Alana said in a calming tone “Ten more minutes that’s all.” She sat back at the table waiting for Freddie’s reaction.

“That’s fine, isn’t it Fred?” Beverly wasn’t asking she was telling.  

“Yeah fine.” Freddie folded her arms and sank into her chair, she wasn’t one for not getting her own way.

“So how do I go about joining this group?”

“You have to be reanimated.” Freddie offered mockingly.

“I meet that criteria.” Alana said straight back.

“I’m not sure you do, you have a pulse.” Freddie remained placid but her voice dripped with poison, Jimmy had never seen Freddie like this, it unnerved him, and her words weren’t aimed his way.

“I know, strange that.” Alana mocked back, not giving anything away. She’d run bored of Freddie and decided to check the oven, letting the steam billow out. “Ah good.” She said to herself, placing the pot in the middle of the table. She grabbed five bowls and forks and handed them out. “Tuck in.” She supplied, taking the lid off. The smell instantly bowelled Jimmy over, his mouth began to water, which was a first, he craved the food so bad, it hit him hard, if he didn’t eat whatever was in that pot he would start screaming. He had never felt anything like it, he tried to calm himself down looking at the others who all looked the same, struggling to remain calm.

Alana started dishing out the meat, since the others were struggling to get past the craving. It had been a long time since she first tasted the meat, years even. It was overpowering and consuming and once eaten there was no way back. She had a good supply though and wasn’t opposed to sharing. “Eat slowly, your digestive system will still be out of bounds.” She gave them a smile, the questions would come later, once they had been satisfied.

Jimmy grabbed a chunk and shoved it in his face before remembering Alana’s words, eat slowly. That was a difficult task, he wanted to swallow not chew the meat that was covered in a thick red sauce. The taste exploded in his mouth, the juices running down his chin as he tried to salvage the remaining drops. The first piece went quick even though he tried to hold himself back. The second piece he ate more slowly, chewed it this time savouring the taste. He felt addicted already, it was pure nectar and he wanted more. He felt….he actually felt hungry.

“What is this?” Beverly finally asked through a mouthful of meat.

“Venison.” Alana was delicately cutting her meat on her plate and eating like a civilised person. Jimmy knew this meat was not venison, he had tasted venison, and it wasn’t to his taste, and he had never wanted to tear his own hair out over the smell of deer.

Freddie was licking her fingers. “You can join the group, if you bring the food.” Alana let out a laugh, they were always so easily won over. “Deal.”

“You have to tell us your story though.” Freddie watched Alana debate this before she nodded. “We meet every Tuesdays three till five in Princes community centre, you know the one?” Alana nodded, eating another thin slice of meat. Jimmy didn’t know how she could control herself. His entire body tingled, his leg began to burn for some reason and then he realised.

“I just ate something.” Jimmy said out loud the others pulled back realising too. 

“To the first of many meals.” Alana raised up a chunk of meat, the others toasting it with a piece of meat on their forks.


	8. Chapter 8

They were walking home quietly it was after ten and they should have been safely locked away in their homes over hours ago. Beverly and Freddie were once again linking Jimmy’s arms to help him to walk. Brian hadn’t offered to carry Jimmy this time to his disappointment. He focused on the burning sensation in his leg, his whole body felt numb, tingling as if it was coming around from anaesthetic. Alana had told him his leg would take a few days to heal and Jimmy had humoured her by nodding his head but now his leg felt different it felt straighter it wasn’t just a dangling mess of limb attached to him he could hear blood rushing to his ears even though that couldn’t be true.

 “Alana is such a good cook though, who knew we could even eat.” Beverly had been talking about her new crush ever since they left the house, Freddie just agreeing with everything she said to get her to hurry up. Jimmy was stuck in the middle of the conversation letting their words fly past him. He was focused on the moody figure leading the way, Jimmy had watched Brian at his most relaxed at the dining table, he had stupidly assumed Brian was warming up to him, but now the guard Brian brooded behind was firmly back in place.

Once they left the house the uneasy feeling he got about Brian had settled over him again, he couldn’t place what it was. Brian was ignoring them, a deep set scowl marring his face, he turned occasionally to see if the group were still following him and every time his gaze would land on Jimmy like a slap across the face.

They walked back the same route they had taken, only now it was busier more lifers were walking the streets getting out socialising with friends and not eating mystery meat in a stranger’s house.

“Shit.” Beverly whispered, she stopped the group making them all pull back behind a wall. “The RPU.” She pointed down the alleyway, a man in a grey uniform was patrolling the streets he had a tranquilliser gun in his hand and was shouting orders at his employees.

“Shit, I can’t go to the kennels, I can’t they’ll kill me.” Freddie stressed.

“You two go,” Jimmy let his arm drop to his sides breaking the linking chain that was helping him walk. “I’ll only hold you up.” Beverly shook her head at him.

“I’m not just leaving you here.”

“Beverly we really need to go.” Freddie whispered she was trying to remain calm but more RPU patrollers were arriving dangerously close to where they were hiding.

“Go. I’ll be fine I’ll see you Tuesday.”

“Damn it Jimmy.” Beverly sighed defeated she still didn’t move. The loud metallic crash from the trash can smacking into the ground had them all jumping. Freddie pulled Beverly the opposite way of the oncoming RPU patrollers marching to see what the noise was. Freddie gave Brian a quick pat on the arm as she ran past him thankful for the distraction he caused.

Jimmy turned to glare at Brian but it was too late they grabbed him harshly and threw him to the ground.

“DON’T MOVE BRAINER, YOU ARE UNDER ARREST FOR VIOLATING CODES 2397 AND 2462 OF THE REFORMATION PROTECTION UNIT BREAKING CURFEW AND ASSOCIATING WITH BRAINERS! YOU DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO AN ATTORNEY YOU DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO SAY ANYTHING!” The man barked at him, and Jimmy did not have any problem hearing what he had to say, he felt the spit from the man’s shouts land on his face and Jimmy tried hard not to flinch away. He was grabbed from the floor and thrown into the van, it wasn’t long before the same happened to Brian. “Fucking zombies.” The man spat slamming the doors shut showering them in darkness.

Jimmy was thrown into a kennel landing flat on the floor. He felt the impact as his face smacked into the harsh surface. His numb body recognised that being shoved to a cement ground was not a pleasant experience. The tingling in his body went from a mild numbness to pins and needles as the cell door was slammed shut behind him. Jimmy used the wall to help pull himself up, resting his back against it. Apart from the cell door everything else was cement. Rows upon rows of cells filled with the reanimated lying on the floor, trying to force themselves down into the ground. Their time was running out and if no one came to collect them they were shipped off for research purposes. Jimmy’s cell was like all the others completely bare just the comfort of the harsh swinging light bulb that hung outside their prison.

He watched as Brian got marched down the corridor of cells, he was being held by four men as he wouldn’t stop trying to escape their grip. He would have been shouting if he could talk. The men stopped to punch Brian in the ribs, before connecting their punches to his face, Brian took the hits unfazed. Jimmy couldn’t watch it, his stomach twisted at the sickening smack of the punches.

Brian was shoved into his cell the men pleased with their work. “Enjoy your stay piss stain.” The men laughed as they left, their heavy boots stomping back up the stairs.

Jimmy turned his head to see Brian staring at the floor, the white board no longer around his neck. The scowl was gone an emotionless stare had taken its place.

“Are you okay?” Jimmy asked knowing full well Brian would ignore him. “Thanks.” Jimmy whispered the words reaching his ears only. “For helping Bev and Freddie.” His gaze lingered a little longer, he wanted to reach out and touch Brian run his fingers through the curls of his hair. Find out who or what had broken this man but Jimmy also wanted to shake him and ask him what the hell was wrong with him?

He spread himself back on the ground, the incessant drip of water running down the walls, the banshee like wailing coming from the other cells was excluding silence from becoming a permanent feature. He closed his eyes to block out the sound the coldness of the ground pressing hard against his back, almost burning into his skin his whole body buzzed the pins and needles starting to become painful and Jimmy revelled in the feeling. Something was happening to him it was then then that he shot up from the ground. “I just closed my eyes.”

 

Jimmy didn’t know how long he had laid on the floor too amazed at his own ability to blink, the pins and needles had stopped though and Jimmy ached for the feeling to return.

“Serial number?” Jimmy peered up at the uniformed man with the clipboard standing in front of his cell.

“JP1045.” The man wrote it down and moved onto the next cell asking the same question. Jimmy sat up from the floor his leg was now perfectly straight apart from the heavy bruising it appeared normal. Jimmy sat slacked jaw prodding at his leg, what the hell was in that tea?

“State your serial number.” The man was getting annoyed and Jimmy looked across from his cell to see Brian ignoring the patroller.

“He can’t speak.” Jimmy shouted over, the man spinning around to glare at him.

“Who the fuck asked you?”

“Well he can’t answer you if he’s mute.” Jimmy retorted the man walked over and shoved his baton through the cell smashing it into Jimmy’s face, he flew back onto the floor with the sheer force of the blow. He touched his face on instinct to see if he was bleeding of course he wouldn’t.

“Anything else you want to add?” It wasn’t a polite tone but since Jimmy couldn’t feel the hits he might as well get another.

“He needs his board to write on asshole.” The door to his cell was opened as two patrollers stepped in cornering him, wanting to see terror in Jimmy’s eyes when all they received was defiance. Their kicks landed to his stomach and chest, the punches aimed at his face when they were done they locked the cell door pleased with their handy work.

“Franklin go get that freaks’ speak and spell will you.” The chubby guy nodded and marched off. Jimmy’s vision was blurred again, but he could see Brian looking at him through the bars he might have looked worried or pissed off Jimmy wasn’t sure, he decided to lie back down on the ground.

Franklin bumbled down the stairs shoving the white board and pen to his boss. He slide the board and pen through the bars watched it slide over to Brian who hands were balled into fists.

“Serial number now or I go back into your little friend’s cell and I won’t finish until I have his brains sliding from my fingertips.” His voice was calm and a grin wormed its way onto his face. Brian took the pen and wrote his serial down.

_BZ3010_

“Fucking pandering to these zombies.” He turned to leave and the other patrollers followed his lead, marching back up the stairs.

It took a few attempts but Jimmy started blinking again his vision less blurry, it was still clouded over, a dirty lens they couldn’t clean. He heard a banging noise against the bars and knew which cell it was coming from.

_Are you okay?_

Brian looked furious and Jimmy didn’t know if that was aimed at him or the guards he hoped the latter.

“I’m fine.”

_Don’t do that again, I can look after myself_

Jimmy wanted to scream join the other wailers maybe they too were stuck beside an asshole.

“What is your problem?” Jimmy wasn’t far off pleading, his fingers were curled around the bars, watching Brian for a reaction. He couldn’t help the pull he felt towards Brian or why it bothered him so much. Jimmy pressed his forehead to the cool bars he couldn’t feel, his eyes lowered to the ground defeated, how much longer was he stuck here? He heard the familiar tapping noise and pulled back to look at the words written on the board.

_I’m waiting for you to remember me._


	9. Chapter 9

“JP1045, Stand to attention.” Jimmy froze, those assholes sure had perfect timing. He read the board again making sure he understood it before three uniformed men crowed his cell.

“Stand the fuck up.” Jimmy slowly rose to his feet, his eyes landed on Brian’s as he watched from his cell, the board around his neck wiped clean.

“Your owner is here to collect you.” Franklin told him politely the other men frowned at him and pushed him slightly.

“For fuck sake Franklin.” One muttered at him, grabbing hold of Jimmy and shoving him out of the cell pushing him to the steps. Jimmy glanced one look back at Brian who was now avoiding his gaze. Jimmy wanted to shout and scream at the man he was leaving behind what the hell was he talking about, what did he mean? Jimmy did remember him he was just the new guy from the support group, nothing else.

Danny had to sign a shit load of paperwork and hand over three thousand dollars to bail Jimmy out, he had a disappointed look at on his face, like a disbarring father when Jimmy was shoved over to him.

“Come on buddy.” Danny said his thanks to the RPU staff there were three friendly female faces sitting at the desk doing the paperwork. The friendly attitude was saved for the lifers not wasted on the reanimated.

“Breaking curfew Jimmy? That is so unlike you.” Danny was driving them home he had told Jimmy it was a Thursday evening it felt longer in the RPU however. “You can’t do it again, they won’t let you back out.” Danny told him solemnly. Jimmy just nodded, he was sitting in the back of the car the air fresheners surrounding him.

“You were always the good twin, getting good grades and—“

“Danny can I ask you something?” Jimmy cut him off he didn’t need to hear the twin speech again, he had heard it sung to him too many times to care now.

“Uh sure champ.”

Jimmy had to ask the only person he knew that could help him and that unfortunately was his brother. “Did I ever know someone called Brian?” He saw Danny’s hand gripped the steering wheel hard, saw the panicked expression in the wing mirror and how quickly Danny tried to calm himself before replying. “Uh prob…probably who doesn’t know a Brian right?” He laughed it was sickening to Jimmy there was something he wasn’t being told, he felt his jaw click in irritation.

“So no one important?”

“Not that I know of.” Jimmy narrowed his eyes at his brother what else wasn’t he telling him?

 

Danny let Jimmy walk into the house first, he guessed lawn time was out of the question since he was now grounded.

“What happened to your leg?” _Shit_ , Jimmy had no idea how to answer that.

“How’d you mean?”

“It looks all fixed up.” Jimmy bent his leg at angle and walked again, dragging the foot behind him this time.

“It’s not.” Jimmy told him, hoping that was enough what he supposed to tell his brother, magic dust fixed his leg. Danny gave him a sceptical look which Jimmy ignored stumbling down into his basement when he could have jogged the distance now.

He sunk down onto his bed, the familiar surroundings of his basement offering little comfort to him now. Jimmy closed his eyes allowing the numbness to take over him, beginning at his toes until it worked its way slowly up, coursing through him until the sharp stinging of pins and needles thrummed under his skin. He could see Brian trapped behind cell walls forgotten about, he snapped his eyes open. Someone was going to get Brian right? The numbness faded as quickly as it began.

“Jimmy I’m off to work.” He heard his brother call down he listened to his movements heard him walk across the floor out the door. Waited for him to start the car and Jimmy jumped from his bed, before he realised what he had done.

“He didn’t lock the door.” Jimmy said out loud, he raced up the stairs of the basement pushing the door open, until the living room stared back at him unimpressed at his arrival or the speed at which he ran.

He grabbed the can of febreeze left on the kitchen counter and sprayed himself down with the whole can, he didn’t want Danny to know he had been out of the basement, he didn’t dare sit on any of the furniture. He wanted to piece together his life, surely this house would contain some memories pictures, letters anything to tell him that he existed before the accident. Everything he knew of his past was given to him in bite size pieces from his brother and he was beginning to doubt any of that was true.

He climbed the stairs he hadn’t been up them since before the crash, he couldn’t walk up unaided and Danny didn’t want him being anywhere near his room. The house was unusually clean, and Jimmy was unsure why that was did he usually keep the house a mess? Danny had taken to sleeping in the master bedroom which Jimmy assumed used to be his, walking inside everything was neat and in place. The room was a mixture of grey and blue tones it had a calming fashion to it you could easily fall asleep here. The bed was perfectly made, and Jimmy stared trying to remember anything about the room, the walls were bare not that Danny would have kept Jimmy’s pictures up. He opened and closed drawers checking in them, they were full of Danny’s socks and ties. One draw full of porn magazines that he quickly shut. They definitely weren’t his, busty blondes were never really his thing.

He switched the lamp off, and left the room disappointed. There was a guest bedroom with beige and pastel green bordering the walls, whoever decorated this house had an eye for design and Jimmy knew that wasn’t him, it definitely wasn’t Danny either. Maybe his brother hired someone to restyle the house, Jimmy wouldn’t have remembered either way. He left the room, and opened the door to the office Jimmy walked over to the computer, it was waiting for Danny’s login in details so Jimmy left it. He sat at the desk opening drawers and pulling out mail, most of it junk or bills all addressed to his brother. Drawers full of pens and the occasional photo he thought was himself until he realised it was Danny. He ran his eyes over the contents of the book shelves, books about car engines and golfing tournaments, all belonging to Danny. There was a picture of the shelf of Jimmy and Danny it was their first day of school. Jimmy sitting with his arms folded sulking and Danny with a huge grin on his face for the camera. It described their relationship to a tee, he gripped the frame hard in his hands, someone had told him to frame this picture, could hear someone laughing about how cute it was, he felt the frame slip through his fingers, before he remembered anything else. The shards of glass skidding across the floor.

“Shit.” Jimmy uttered, he looked around for something to conceal the shards of glass in he swiped the newspaper from Danny’s desk stopping to look at the front page. 

_Dr Frederick Chilton pictured left with his partner Will Graham, was honoured today at UMU for his outstanding research in the field of…_

Jimmy stopped reading and studied the faces of the men, he knew them they weren’t his friends or colleagues, and the longer he stared at the bearded man the more bitter he grew.

“He’s my therapist,” it hit him hard, had to sit down at Danny’s desk. He had been seeing a therapist every fortnight, he asked Jimmy the same questions gave him the same droll look. “What a bastard.” Jimmy scoffed he ripped the article from the paper and shoved it in his pocket. He couldn’t remember how long he had been seeing his therapist but his memory was slowly trickling in, he needed to find more pictures. He quickly cleaned away the glass, scooping them up in the newspaper and disposing of the paper in the bin. He put the frame back on the shelf and hoped Danny wouldn’t notice the missing glass.

He pulled the cord down from the ceiling to climb the stairs of the attic, if Danny had kept any of his stuff it would be hidden away in there Jimmy hoped. Jimmy switched the light on in the attic it was dusty and lifers would have sneezed before stepping in, he scanned the place until he found a pile of four boxes with the same name written in block capitals. _Jimmy_

He did exist before his crash, he went to high school as he looked at his diploma he was valedictorian which Jimmy felt quite smug about.  There was a picture of him graduating with his friends and Danny not in a graduation robe looking subdued. A picture of Jimmy with two guys in his dorm room at university, they were giving the camera a thumbs up their bags in the corner still unpacked. Jimmy couldn’t place those guys either. The rest of the box was filled with other certificates nothing that helped push Jimmy’s memory forward. He knew he was a teacher so he knew he had a degree Danny had told him and so far that seemed to be true.

The other box was filled with clothes a garish orange sweater that Jimmy couldn’t picture himself wearing, lots of sweaters and chequered shirts. He did dress like the average teacher then. He wanted to change into them, get out of this suit he had been wearing for so long but Danny would know he had been up here, so he put the clothes in the box placing the tape back over it. The last two boxes were filled with books, they were all historical text, and Jimmy tried to remember himself buying any of them, or what he found interesting of the subject. He couldn’t figure out his own history let alone anyone else’s. He picked up a book about Louis XIV and the study of absolutism, another book about the enlightenment, he knew these books had a common theme but he couldn’t place it so threw them back in the box. The other box contained mostly postmodern text, he scavenged around in the box until his eyes fixed onto an out of place book that had his name printed on the front. He pulled it out. _American Revolution: War and Society by Jimmy Price._

Jimmy studied the front and back cover, there was a list of the other books published by himself he checked the box again but they weren’t in there. He read over his name several times, he had wrote this more to the point it had a picture of him on the inside sleeve cover.  He had no recollection of writing this book nor did he know anything about the American Revolution. Jimmy scanned the content page, none the wiser. He flipped through the book, it was a lengthy one over eight hundred pages it was obvious he put a lot of time and research into this book. He flipped back to the start stopping when he reached the dedication page.

_For Brian._


	10. Chapter 10

“Jimmy do you feel different?” Beverly stopped in her path to ask the question. She couldn’t believe it when she saw Jimmy walking by himself. “Ever since,” She paused to think. “We left Alana’s house I’ve felt…things.”

“Miss Katz this crush of yours is getting out of hand.” Jimmy teased and allowed Beverly to swat at his arm.

“Shut up, you know what I mean you feel it too.” She linked Jimmy’s arm out of habit and carried on walking. “My stitches started to itch that’s never happened before.” She sounded shocked and Jimmy looked down at the arm he was linking to see some of the stitches had fallen out and the wound in the process of healing. 

“I don’t think that meat was venison.” Jimmy finally said.

“No shit Jim.”

Jimmy was trying his best to deal with one issue at a time, for months now he had been stuck on repeat, following what his brother told him to do. If he wasn’t in the basement he was attending support groups or seeing his therapist. He took his published book down with him into the basement and hid in under his bed, taking it out to read when Danny had locked the door. He was in the process of learning about the British colonies but kept stopping to look at the dedication page again. He hadn’t told Beverly about any of this, didn’t want to say it out loud.

“I hope Alana is there.” Beverly was smiling and Jimmy couldn’t help but roll his eyes at her.

“Don’t roll your eyes at me, you’ve got it bad with Brian.” She laughed, Jimmy was the one to stop this time.

 “Come on Jim, you never take your eyes off him.” Beverly stopped her teasing “I’m just kidding Jimmy.”

“No it’s fine, it doesn’t matter.” He snapped out of his gaze to give Bev a reassuring smile. 

“Hey!” They both turned to see someone waving at them from across the road, they looked around to see if the person was mistaken and not waving at somebody else. They watched her cross the street walking over to them, Beverly recognised her first grinning widely at her.

“Alana.” She gave her a hug in greeting pulling back to look at her. “I didn’t recognise you with the disguise.” Alana laughed at her, the oversized hoodie was covering most of her face with the darkest shade of glasses covering her eyes, and in the heat she was drawing more attention to herself.

“Hi Jimmy.” Alana looked at his leg, “All healed?”

Jimmy welcomed the hug from Alana, it was odd he could feel her arms around him and it shook him slightly. “Yeah…it’s amazing.”

“Good, I’ve brought some lunch for us I packed plenty.” Jimmy nearly pulled her into another hug he was so happy about the thought of more meat. He was beginning to crave it could feel something pulling at him, his gums were starting to throb. He noticed it last night he couldn’t sit still was pacing his basement trying to place what was wrong with him, now he kept his eyes on the cooler bag Alana was carrying his mouth starting to water.

They took the back entrance into the community centre walking through to the basketball court. Jimmy looked around for Brian but couldn’t see him, if his heart wasn’t already stopped it would have done so. He watched as Alana and Beverly walked to their seats, Alana introducing herself to Jack who was genuinely pleased to greet her. It was hard not to smile at Alana, she was a welcoming person even when she had a gun in Jimmy’s face he didn’t feel threatened by her. 

Jimmy stood still in place, Freddie and Abigail were not here either, and he was beginning to panic the anxious tension building in his body was both exciting and terrifying all at once.

“Jim, come sit down.” Beverly called over to him, he felt his feet move from underneath him walking to take his seat.

He watched Alana bring a flask out of her bag and pour out the red liquid into some cups she passed one to Jack who eyed it suspiciously before taking a big gulp. Jimmy felt a cup placed into his fingertips by Alana.

“Don’t fight it.” She whispered to him, Jimmy didn’t know what she meant he let the tea warm his hands before taking a sip. The flavour dancing on his tongue the warmth spreading through his body again, he sank into his chair and let whatever the hell he was drinking take over him.

Freddie arrived late she was quiet kept her gaze to the ground, Jimmy noted her skin looked better much like Beverly’s arm it was beginning to heal. Freddie took her seat and declined the offer of tea but Alana placed it into her hands anyway.

“Should I introduce myself?” Alana asked Freddie didn’t say anything, didn’t acknowledge that she had even spoken, Jimmy was about to ask Freddie what was wrong but Alana had already taken to the floor.

“My name Is Alana Lec—“She stopped herself, cursing her mistake. “Alana Bloom I used to work as a psychology professor I loved my job, it was definitely trying at times but I worked so hard to build my career and—“She stopped again biting her lip, her eyes looked watery she shook the tension off before carrying on. “I was murdered eight years ago.” The group all sat up in their chairs shocked, eight years? She was still breathing looked very much alive and she had been dead eight years? “My husband, well my ex-husband pushed me out of a second story window suffice to say our relationship ended on a bitter note.”

“Eight years?” Beverly finally said out loud

“I know, my recovery is a story for another day, but for now let’s have lunch.” She smiled uneasy sitting back down in her seat. The whole time during her introduction Jimmy had focused on Freddie when she tore her gaze away from the ground Jimmy realised she was trying to cry.

“Freddie what happened?” She shook her head at him, too upset to say anything. Alana was handing out chunks of meat to Jack, Jimmy couldn’t concentrate on anything else but the smell, his worry for Freddie being kicked to the curb as the need took over him. He grabbed two pieces of the meat covered in a thick red sauce and thrust them into his mouth.

“Slowly.” Alana reminded them, as she eat her pieces delicately. They all ate in silence other than the sounds of meat being chewed and ripped apart. Jimmy felt the pins and needles taking over his body again he closed his eyes as his skin burned, heat flowing through his veins, when he opened his eyes again his vision was clear the clouded mist evaporated.

He blinked repeatedly in shock, when he turned to Freddie she had real tears pouring down her face.

“She’s gone Jimmy.” She gasped out and Jimmy felt the room spin.


	11. Chapter 11

He knelt down in front of her chair, taking her hands in his. “Tell me what happened.” He told her as calmly as he possibly could, his whole body was on edge a nauseating pull took over his body, wanting to drag him to the ground he felt something inside him twisting to get out.  He gripped Freddie’s hands hard, if he let go he would fall to the ground in pain.

“I walked by her house, usually she is there you know waving at the front window.” Freddie sobbed out a smile, “But she hadn’t been there the past few days and she wasn’t at the meeting last week so I thought I’d ask.” Jimmy kept his gaze on Freddie, the others watching them closely, he knew Freddie would stop to ask her inquisitive nature would always take over, if it was any of the others they would have carried on walking by the house. “Her mother screamed at me, told me to get off her property, Abigail’s dad heard his wife screaming and he came running out with his shotgun. He said—“She stopped to wipe her tears away, trying to collect herself, Jimmy braced himself. “He said he had no daughter and the government came for that monster last week.”  Jimmy finally let go of Freddie’s hands and sunk to the floor.

“We have to help her.”

“There’s nothing we can do Jimmy.” Beverly told him.

“So what that’s it? She just becomes research fodder like she didn’t matter? She had her whole life in front of her and her parents just gave her away.”

“She was dead Jim.” Beverly stated “She didn’t have a life anymore it was already taken from her.”

“I wish we could help I really do.” Jack said sadly, it was the longest he had gone without a drink of formaldehyde.

Jimmy stood shaking his head, anger building within, he hands balled into fists by his side. “Why don’t we all just stick a fucking bullet in our heads and be done with it.” The balled up fists opened to flip a chair out in front of him as he stormed out of the court.  He walked from room to room, slamming the doors behind him as he went. Stopping to kick over trash cans and throw books from shelves. The anger was ebbing away from him as he trashed his way out of the community centre. His chest heaved but no breath was leaving his body, he sat himself down on the stairs of the exit bringing his knees to his chest, he had to wait for Beverly to leave the meeting to walk her home, he was upset but he wouldn’t leave her to walk home alone.

He let his head rest on his knees wondering why he couldn’t cry, he didn’t know what to hope for Abigail he didn’t want to think of her locked in a cell somewhere alone or lying dissected on a cold table, her brain bagged up and ready to ship for testing. He knew his brother had a gun he hid it under his mattress, something there father did, Jimmy never really felt the need for one, but now he was contemplating the reasons why not to blow his brains out, he wouldn’t give the RPU the satisfaction of harvesting him for fun and his brother could move on with his life.

He felt a figure sit down beside him on the step.

“What do you want?” Jimmy snapped, he guessed the anger still had its claws digging into him.

A board was placed in front of him.

_I’m sorry_

“Where the hell have you been? I thought you were still at the kennel.” He shoved Brian hard he couldn’t stop the anger escaping him, he reeled back as soon as Brian glared at him.

“Did you hear about—“Jimmy couldn’t say it but Brian nodded his head at him, he must have walked into the hall as soon as Jimmy had stormed out of it because his tea and half eaten food was placed beside him.

“I don’t think I can do this anymore.” Jimmy ran a shaking hand through his hair, it was still matted and he pulled his hand back annoyed. Brian finished writing and handed the board over.

_You’ve never quit before_

“I don’t remember a before.” Jimmy retorted “I don’t remember anything I don’t remember you.” Brian couldn’t hide the look of hurt and it instantly killed the anger inside of Jimmy. Brian pulled out a packet of cigarettes unwrapping the newly packaged box, he pulled one out with his teeth and placed it between his lips lighting it.

_“Thought you said you were going to stop.” Brian jumped at the words, totally busted. Jimmy had his arms crossed over his chest his head tilted on the side a shit eating grin plastered on his face._

_“I will last one, I swear I’m going to stop tomorrow.”_

_“You always say that.” Jimmy laughed, he let his arms drop from his chest as Brian pulled him into a hug. They were stood outside on their lunch break. Jimmy pulled the cigarette from his fingers and threw it to the ground stubbing it out with his foot._

_“You can start now.” Jimmy stole a kiss from Brian as he opened his mouth to protest at the loss of nicotine. “It’s a dirty habit.” He heard Brian laugh at the playfulness of Jimmy’s words. “Besides I want you around for a long time.” Jimmy pulled back from the hug slightly Brian was looking back at him with everything he could give, like he was it for Brian._

The memory punched Jimmy six ways to Sunday and he let out a gasp, he could see Brian looking at him oddly and he needed to get the hell out of there.

“Take Bev home.” He didn’t look at Brian he was already up and running, he didn’t stop until he got round the corner from his house, he knew if his brother saw him running he’d have a million questions to answer. He dragged himself the rest of the way until he sat trembling in the basement.


	12. Chapter 12

“Jimmy, Buddy?” He could hear his voice being called, probably Danny shouting of him to get up the stairs but he couldn’t move his feet. “Buddy you’re starting to scare me and not in a zombie way.” Danny rushed out, Jimmy focused on the words he realised his brother was sitting right in front of him.

“Fine.”

“You sure? I’ve been calling of you for half hour and normally you would be up the stairs giving me hell by now.” Jimmy couldn’t humour his brother right now he could feel himself shaking and hoped it wasn’t noticeable to Danny.

“One of the members of the group got sent away.” Jimmy ignored the look of surprise on Danny’s face that he was actually talking to him. “She was still in high school.

“I’m sorry champ.”

“Are you?” Jimmy snapped “You couldn’t care less you’re a lifer you don’t live in fear of being sent away for dissection, or set on fire for people’s entertainment. You’re not just rotting away through no fault of your own. I didn’t ask for this Danny and neither did Abigail.” He turned to look away from his brother at the mention of her name.

“Abigail Hobbs?”

“What do you know and I swear Danny you better tell me the truth.” Jimmy pointed a rotten finger at his brother, who pulled away from the threat.

“It was all over the news a while back, a boyfriend of hers uh…” Danny stopped to remember the name. “Boyle someone… they had gone missing, the search was on TV for weeks, her boyfriend was found dead near by the lake and Abigail was found wondering around in the woods nearby uh…she came back.” Danny finished, Jimmy watched him closely checking his features to spot if he was lying.

“What happened?”

“No one knows for sure, the girl uh Abigail couldn’t remember and eventually the news stopped caring.”

“She never told us at group what happened...thanks for telling me this.” His brother nodded at him. “I don’t think I want to go back to the group anymore.”

“Whatever you want champ.” Jimmy wished Danny would speak so openly about his past but he knew that wasn’t going to happen, Jimmy was unsure whether he would want to hear it anyway. He let his brother leave. He didn’t lock the door and Jimmy never moved from his corner.

 

“You look different Mr Price.” His therapist was studying him far too closely, he squirmed in his chair under the heavy gaze. He clicked his pen on and off a few times before writing down a few notes.

“How do you feel today?”

 _Exhausted, lonely, scared_. “I don’t feel anything.” Jimmy replied emotionless.

“You’re brother tells me you lost someone close to you.” Jimmy cursed out his brother to himself, he was unsure of how much Danny had told Chilton, surely he wouldn’t blab about his support group.

“That loss must have hit you hard?” The tone was patronizing pulling at Jimmy’s nerves for a reaction. Jimmy shook his head staring down at Chilton his eyes narrowed and blistering. Chilton gave him a wry grin before writing something else down.

“Mr Price, you do know if you’re withholding information from me this can have serious consequences for you.” Chilton wasn’t threatening he was simply explaining, Jimmy’s gaze landed on the framed certificate sitting on his therapist’s desk it was the award he read about in the newspaper.

“Ah the picture again, what question will it be this time?” It took a few minutes for Jimmy to work out what he was talking about, dawning on him suddenly he always asked about the picture on Chilton’s desk the one with his partner on some fishing trip. He remembered his last session with Chilton, he had confessed to cheating with his receptionist. Jimmy went for the neck.

“If something happened to your partner, how would you feel?” Jimmy slowly pulled his eyes from the frame to burn away at Chilton, he had shook the man and a grin that looked no less than evil fell on Jimmy’s face.

“Mr Price….do you have any urges to hurt me?”

 _Yes._ “Of course not.” Jimmy relaxed back into his seat. “I’m sorry if my question upset you.” He was anything but. He wasn’t sure if Chilton had misinterpreted his question as a threat and he wasn’t bothered if he had, Jimmy wanted the upper hand for once. “What if he reanimated?

Chilton tried to hide his annoyance at the questions, he let out a huff of air. “Mr Price these questions are irrelevant to your treatment.”

“I wasn’t aware I was being treated.”

“Mr Price do you remember me?”

 _Like a bullet to the head._ Jimmy shook his head “Danny tells me you’re my therapist the cheapest he could find.” He hadn’t, Chilton was expensive draining away Jimmy’s life savings he had no right to spend anymore.

Chilton had a sour expression trying to shoot down Jimmy, but Jimmy was full of energy his body was wired differently now could feel a warmth running through his body, his fingers digging into the leather of the chair.

“I think we’ll end our session here Mr Price.” Chilton closed his notebook, obviously rattled. Jimmy gave him a shrug and pretended to make a scene about standing and dragging himself out of the room.

 

 On the drive home Jimmy was riding shot gun, still covered in small green air fresheners.

“You know, you don’t smell as bad as you normally do.”

“Thanks Danny.” Jimmy saw his brother grinning at his reply, he had meant it sarcastically but it went straight over his head.

“How did the session go?” Jimmy shrugged feigning ignorance. “He told me I’ve been seeing him for a while now but I don’t remember him.” Jimmy let the lie roll off his tongue his brother nodded sympathetically at him. “Why did you tell him about Abigail?”

“Uh…well you see the thing uh.”

“Danny answer the question.”

“I have to tell him if you ask me anything different to usual, so I told him.” Jimmy lifted his eyes shaking his head in annoyance.

“So you’re spying on me?” Danny shook his head avidly.

“No I’m only trying to help. Dr Chilton is trying to help.” Jimmy ignored his brother he was the Remus to his Romulus and Jimmy paused himself as that thought hit him. He kept his mouth shut would have to watch what he was saying to Danny from now on. Who knew what he had been telling his therapist this whole time.


	13. Chapter 13

_His friend had dragged him out, brought him to some club that was having a punk night. He wasn’t a fan, give him cheesy 80’s music any day of the week. Bodies kept pushing into him no apologises offered, the hammering music making him wince slightly he was far too old for this shit. His friend was trying to shout to him over the music, probably telling him to lighten up it was his birthday. The band finished their set and all he could hear was ringing in his ears he had just turned forty five he shouldn’t be feeling this decrepit already. The respite was short lived as another band took to the stage, this time his eyes glued onto the guy wearing the leather jacket and the tightest jeans leaving nothing to the imagination. He thickly swallowed and wished he had a drink in his hand, recovering alcoholics often did._

_The band started to play a cover of should I stay or should I go, he was suitably impressed they weren’t as terrible as the first band, his attention was solely on the bassist however. He was the spark, gliding across the stage to sing into the microphone. Energy thrumming though his body the cocky grin exuding arrogance rather than charm, he was sinful. He demanded attention and got it. And he was the match waiting to burn, watching from the crowd doubting himself for a second that he couldn’t have this, couldn’t make this guy beg beneath him. He returned a cocky grin of his own and the flames began._

_He was leading the chase as he sauntered away, could feel his prey following behind, the bassist had been sat at the bar after the gig and he watched him not daring to go near the bar, his self-restraint was piss poor at the best of times. With a flick of the head he had the guy following him, he kept his face steady couldn’t believe his fucking luck if he was honest but he didn’t let it show. He stopped unsure of where he was leading either of them, until he felt himself pulled back, shoved into a room and thrust against a wall. A door was slammed behind him and he heard it lock. The room was dark but that didn’t matter when he felt the hard smack of lips to his own. There was nothing gentle or teasing about the kiss and he didn’t want it to be._

_He ran his hands up the guy’s chest, spreading his hands wide to pull down the leather jacket tossing it behind him. Was he really going to have a one night stand in a broom closet? He felt his head being tipped back as a skilled tongue ran down the length of his neck, stopping to bite his adam’s apple, and fuck yeah he was having a one night stand in a broom closet. Hands found their way under his shirt pulling it apart, could hear the buttons landing on the floor, he raised his head to indulge in another brutal kiss, his stubble scratching on his clean shaven jaw, it was too overwhelming and not enough, he deepened the kiss, heard himself moan as the guy grinned against his mouth pleased with himself. He felt the cold air hit his chest once his shirt was discarded of, instantly warmed by the stranger’s bites and nips to his collarbone. He ran his hands down the bassist’s back pulling him closer, grinding against his leg could never be close enough he wanted more and he couldn’t see a damn thing as his hands scrambled to remove his belt. He heard a small laugh that irritated him. Hands were placed over his stopped his actions as the stranger easily slide the belt from his jeans, he didn’t need any further incentive he ripped the buttons open, the bassist distracted him with more messy kisses could hear him moan when he finally got his hands on him, he always liked a guy that went commando. He pushed him back to the door running his fingers through the small curls of his hair kissing him until he was begging to be touched, his hips pushing forward trying to find any friction. He sunk to his knees and sucked the bassist’s cock between his lips. A hand was tangled in his hair forcing him to take more, let his mouth be fucked by this guy he didn’t know the name of. It was fast and demanding, he sucked harder taking him more letting his mouth be used, as his fuck for the night started thrusting into his mouth with no abandon. He heard a breathy fuck fall from his lips as he felt his a hand still his actions._

_His lips were bruised and truly fucked and he wondered why he had been stopped, he felt something land in his hands. Lube and a condom already ripped open. He stood from the ground his face pulled into another kiss as the bassist’s hand unbuttoned his pants, wrapping a hand around his cock and pumping it a few times, his groan was lost to another kiss. A light was turned out, almost blinding him a sharp contrast to the darkened room.  He took a breather to study the guy his sharp blue eyes were dilated and piercing his own, his mouth bruised as he was pulled forward into another forceful kiss. He watched as the stranger took the lube from his hands and coated his fingers liberally he gave him a steely gaze before pushing one finger inside of him. He was breathing heavily, lust burning through him, he stroked himself but he wanted more, the stark reminder of the now bright broom closet gave way to impatience. The bassist’s cocky grin had returned he watched him add another finger he let a breathy moan escape him, rolling the condom on. He grabbed the bassist and spun him around, kicking his legs out wider he braced himself against the door, none of their actions quieter no one could hear them over the pounding music. He poured lube onto himself, pushing his cock to the bassist’s ass they weren’t here to make love this was purely fucking._

_He shoved into him hard, the guy arched his back and cried out, resting his head on him shoulder, he could feel the sweat running down his back onto his chest as he pushed into him kissing his mouth licking his way inside as he shoved his cock in harder. The body connected to his started to thrust back, their mouths sliding together in a play for dominance. He felt fucking delirious gripping the bassist’s hips hard as he slammed into him over and over, each one earning him a moan and a bruising kiss. He heard himself gasp and swear against the wicked lips capturing his. He grinded their bodies together, forcing the bassist to brace himself more on the door his whole body tightened as the bassist pushed back matching the pounding rhythm of his hips. He squeezed the guy’s length in his hand as he fucked into him harder, a breathy gasp filling his ears. He heard the bassist’ breath hitch and his hips stutter as he came, his seed spilling over his fingers, his heavy breathing spurring him on to pound into him two or three more times until he was crying out, his mouth caught in another kiss._

_The cold air hit them quickly, he pulled out and disposed of the condom trying to gather up his clothes. The other guy looked thoroughly fucked and judging by the look he got from the bassist he looked gone too. He watched as the guy got dressed pulling his leather jacket on last, he walked over to him and pulled him in for a sickeningly sweet kiss, not like any others they had shared. This was slow and his chest filled with something he didn’t want to put a name to, he ran his fingers through the curls of his hair one more time before he pulled away from him._

_“What’s your name?”_

_“You could have asked me that before you had your dick in my ass” His voice was raw and it went straight to his dick he gave the son of a bitch a glare.”_

_“Asshole.”_

_The guy gave him a shit eating grin turning to leave, he didn’t want him to go wanted to take him home for another round but he stayed silent._

_“It’s Brian.” He said before walking back out into the club, getting lost in the crowd._

Jimmy shot up from his bed a layer of sweat covering his body, he was panting hard even though breathing still avoided him. He frantically looked around trying to gauge where the fuck he was. Had he just woken up? Had he fallen asleep? The panic threatening to take over subsided once he realised he was still in his basement locked away safely. He checked the clock six hours had passed and he had been where exactly? He got out of bed and began to slowly pace he felt shaky, he just had a wet dream with none of the benefits he couldn’t get it up he didn’t have a working circulatory system. He didn’t know whether that was a dream or a memory. It was half four in the morning and he wanted nothing more than to see Brian but that wasn’t happening he wasn’t going back to the group. He slowly sat back down onto his mattress and did what he normally did after a bad dream he screamed.


	14. Chapter 14

Jimmy was sitting on the front porch, he could feel the drop in temperature the chill breeze cooling his face. He had been uneasy since the dream trying to piece together the flickering memories that came to him unsure if they happened or not. He hadn’t fallen asleep again whatever it was that knocked him unconscious in the first place had left his system.

He didn’t go to his support group meeting, and Danny didn’t push him on the subject he’d rather Jimmy never bothered with the group at all. He knew he had missed the meeting though could feel it under his skin, his gums were starting to throb and the dull ache of hunger was beginning to burn away at him from the inside. Whatever Alana was feeding them, he was hooked. Jimmy could only go a week before the craving for more starting to spread like wildfire through his veins. He tried to shift his thoughts from ripping apart chunks of meat with his teeth, piece after piece until the ache dulled replaced by a manic calm.

He tried to leave the porch as soon as he saw them cross the road to his house, Beverly must have walked the block until she found him, she was walking with Freddie they both smiled when they saw Jimmy sitting there, he didn’t return one back. He noticed they looked different, healthier somehow.

“Hey, you coming?”  

They both stopped at the bottom of his lawn, wanting to get going.

 “We can’t use the community centre anymore it’s getting knocked down.”

“They probably heard you trashing the place.” Freddie muttered, Beverly elbowed her to stop.

“We’re meeting at Alana’s from now on.”

Jimmy didn’t risk looking at them, focused on the cars driving past at the end of the street.

“I’m not going.”

“Jimmy don’t be like this.” Beverly tried to step towards him but Freddie stopped her.

“Look we’re all sorry about Abigail but there’s nothing we can do about it. Moping around won’t help now are you coming to group or not?” Freddie crossed her arms over her chest, letting a finger bounce on her arm, she was never a patient person.

“No.” Jimmy stood from the porch. “I quit.”

“Don’t do this Jimmy.” Beverly this time walked forward, but Jimmy took a step back closer to the door.

“Just save it okay, some support group this was as soon as anyone needs help we’re just meant to forget about them, let them have their brains mashed and that’s fine move on let’s go have a jolly trip to Alana’s.” He was being petty and he knew it but he wanted them both to leave get the hell off his property and never come back.

“We didn’t forget about her, there was nothing we could do.” Beverly stressed.

“We didn’t even try.”

“What did you want us to do Jimmy? Infiltrate the RPU and steal her back, hold a petition march in the fucking streets. We are powerless we have nothing. The only thing any of us have in common is this support group.”

“So go then, go to your girlfriend’s house and drink tea and pretend any of you give a shit about each other.”

“Fuck you Jim.” Beverly’s voice remained steady her eyes blazing away at him as she stared him down before storming away.

 

 “Happy now?” Freddie said dryly he had expected her to shout but the hard glare was worse than anything she could have said. She walked away to catch up to Beverly he watched them until he couldn’t see them anymore. A wave of guilt stabbed him in the chest and he slumped back down onto the porch.

By Friday everything was slowing down around him, the numbness had faded into nothingness as he writhed on the floor letting his screams fill the house. Danny had left for his nightshift which Jimmy would be more grateful for if he wasn’t in searing pain. He couldn’t explain to his brother why he was dying all over again. He couldn’t explain it to himself he couldn’t think everything was closing down on him. The grey mist had taken over his vision again, everything was far away but he was trapped. His mouth chomping at thin air as his gums fought for a release his fingers clawing at the floor beneath him.

He fought to quench the monster fighting to get out of him or slowing dying inside of him he wasn’t sure which, his screams had turned into raspy calls his voice giving up on him. He heard banging noises coming from directly above his basement, no clue whether they were real or not. If people were coming to end his misery he needed them to hurry up. The whole neighbourhood must have heard his screaming it was probably the RPU rushing down the stairs to take him away. The door to the stairs was unlocked and Jimmy heard someone slowly walk down the stairs he could smell it now. The meat. His whole body burned, the craving taking over him, his mouth drooling and his teeth still chomping away at nothing, the smell was getting closer and he heard herself emit another raspy growl, the figure stood above him, Jimmy clawed at them screaming once more until the meat was thrown to the floor. He dived to reach it and ate it from the floor, swallowing the thick chunks of meat as fast as he could, his gums dancing as the thick sauce coated his mouth.

He ate until there was nothing left, he writhed on the floor until the numbness took over one more. Someone helped him sit up straight, his touch making the pins and needles spark in his body. He felt a cup of warm liquid being placed into his hands. He blinked slowly until his body adjusted again his vision clearer, the monster happily going back to sleep. He let the liquid warm his body, taking sip after sip he turned to see who had saved him and he wasn’t surprised.

“Th...thanks.” Jimmy caught his voice again.

“Welcome.”

Jimmy startled not expecting the low drawl of Brian’s voice to fill his ears. He noticed the whiteboard was finally gone.

“You can talk?”

Brian gave him a small nod “Came back a few days ago.” He gave Jimmy a small smile that made Jimmy’s stomach turn and twist that had nothing to do with food. “The window was open so.” Brian shrugged sitting down beside Jimmy.

“Alana said it was important you ate I would have come sooner but Danny.” He watched Brian fume slightly at the mention of his brother, he let it go.

“What is she feeding us?”

Brian shook his head unsure “I don’t know Jimmy but we need to keep eating it, if that is what happens.”

Jimmy didn’t want to dwell on it, if he started thinking too much about the food and the possible reasons for the hold it had on him he might lose his grip. 

“Is Beverly mad at me?”

“You really upset her Jim.”

Jimmy let out a shallow breath, he hated himself for it. “I’m an asshole.” He rested his head back against the wall.

“Thought that was me.” Brian gave him a cheeky wink and the dream Jimmy had tried hard to block out came hurtling back at him.

“I just don’t want to watch them all being taken away.” Jimmy kept his eyes straight ahead of him staring at his bed he had trashed to pieces. “Wondering which one will be next to go.”

“They’re your friends, they need you don’t let the lifers ruin what little you have. What happened to Abigail was awful and I swear to you we’ll get them back for sending her away.” His tone took a sinister turn and Jimmy found himself nodding along ready to march into whatever battle Brian was planning. “It’s us against them Jimmy.”

“What happened to you?” Jimmy turned his head to the side to watch Brian he was already shaking his head.

“I can’t tell you that.”

“Of course not.”

“Until you remember what happened.” Brian turned to pierce him with a blue eyed stare and Jimmy was pleased he was sitting down. “Until you remember me.”

“Can’t you just tell me that would help speed up the memory process.” Jimmy deadpanned, Brian smiled shaking his head. “Ass.” Jimmy pouted.

“I need you to remember yourself not reiterate what others are forcing you to believe.”

Jimmy had a feeling he was talking about Danny.

“Then will you tell me?”

“Of course.”

Jimmy drank the last of his tea, it tasted sweeter he liked this cup more than the others he had drank.

“This tastes different.”

“I added honey to it.” Brian stretched his legs out in front of him making himself more comfortable sitting on the basement floor was not ideal.

“That’s my favourite?” Jimmy was unsure

“Are you asking or telling me?

Jimmy laughed this was not going to be easy, Brian wasn’t even giving away the slightest bit of information. He squeezed his eyes together as if that would force a memory to bubble to the surface but he couldn’t think.

“Well it’s my favourite now.” Jimmy settled on. “You know what else my favourite is?” The teasing tone had Brian tilting his head on the side to play along.

“Hmm whatever could it be?”

“Your voice, fuck it’s like the best sound ever.” Jimmy felt his pulse beginning to build, like a starter engine trying to come to life. His tone was downright dirty as Brian leaned closer to him to whisper in his ear.

“Are you flirting with me?” The low gravelly voice was sweeter than the honey in his tea and Jimmy could feel himself blush.

“Maybe, I can flirt with my…” Jimmy pulled back stopping himself, the mood gone as he sat frowning. “Sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything.” Jimmy made some distance between himself and Brian throwing his head back against the wall closing his eyes.

“My what?” Brian asked in the same tone.

“I know you’re important to me I’m certain of this.” Jimmy opened his eyes to look at Brian who took his hand slowly entwining their fingers together a calm took over Jimmy it was everything he needed without having to ask. “You have to be my boyfriend or husband.” He saw Brian shaking his head and Jimmy pulled his hand back the calm replaced with annoyance.

“Don’t give me guesses, only what you’re certain of.”

“I’m certain you’re an asshole.” Jimmy huffed crossing his arms against his chest.

“I’ve missed the ‘Jimmy tantrum’ go ahead it’s been a while.” Brian looked so pleased with himself Jimmy wanted to punch him.

“I found a book in the attic, I think Danny must have missed it.” Brian was studying him closely he watched as Jimmy got up and walked over to the bed, lifting the mattress slightly to retrieve the book, he threw it over to Brian.

“The dedication page.” He said, Brian didn’t even bother looking he knew what it said.

“That could be anyone.”

Jimmy tiled his head on the side and smugly said. “You didn’t even look.”

Brian this time opened the book and read the words, running his finger over them.

“I’m certain you’re not just a friend to me.” Jimmy sat back down opposite Brian.

“Why’s that?”

“Did I fuck you in a broom closet?” Jimmy asked point blank.

A wide grin spread across Brian’s face “Which time?” Jimmy groaned into his hands totally mortified he had hope the dream was just a fantasy and not something he did regularly.

“I’m certain I did that.” Jimmy pulled a face making Brian laugh.

“I had a dream about us, you were playing in some band and the next moment the broom closet.”

“Was it good?”

“I don’t know I think you played a few wrong notes.” Jimmy felt Brian playfully push him making them both laugh.

“Such a sassy fucker.” Brian shook his head grinning and Jimmy wanted this forever just the two of them in the damp basement he didn’t want anything else, it all felt familiar to him like he had known Brian for years and yet he couldn’t remember why.

“I need to go.” Jimmy’s little fantasy of them living forever under his brother’s stairs was quickly dashed. “I’ll pick you up next Tuesday for the group Danny should be at work.” Jimmy didn’t ask how Brian knew Danny’s schedule, he just nodded already trying to plan the best way to grovel for forgiveness from Beverly.

“Will you kiss me?” Jimmy quickly asked as Brian was standing up to leave, he wasn’t sure if he had heard him but he stopped to look at him.

“It’s illegal”

“So is breaking and entering but you didn’t have a problem with that.”

Brian shook his head laughing, he held his hand out for Jimmy to take pulling himself up so he was looking up into Brian’s eyes.

“I think it will help my memory.”

“You’re not a Disney princess Jim, it doesn’t work like tha—“  
Jimmy grabbed the lapels of Brian’s leather jacket and pulled him close, crashing their mouths together, Jimmy had planned for a sweet goodbye kiss, but with teeth sinking into his bottom lip and his hands touching every bit of skin he could get his hands on it was anything but innocent. He pushed Brian back into the wall, kissing him harder as he heard himself or maybe it was Brian gasp, it was then they he felt himself being pushed away.

“Okay.” Brian paused putting his hands up to distance himself “I need to go now before I do something stupid.” Jimmy couldn’t stop the pout forming on his lips, could still feel Brian’s teeth digging into them and he wanted more.

“I’ll see you next week okay.” He took Jimmy’s face in his hands and rubbed their noses together and Jimmy just about fucking melted to the floor. He felt a kiss placed on his forehead. When he opened his eyes Brian was gone and Jimmy had never missed anyone so much.


	15. Chapter 15

_He was marking assignments in the staff room, his friend Stephanie trying to lure all the sordid details from his night out._

_“Why does nobody reference correctly, if you’re stating a date reference it, it’s not that hard.” He scribbled a cutting remark down onto the paper._

_“Answer the question Jimmy.” She was getting impatient._

_“I am not one to kiss and tell.”_

_“Oh so there was kissing.” She squealed “Go on I’m all ears, which one was it?” Jimmy rolled his eyes at her._

_“Never going to happen.”_

_“Admit you had fun though, way better than watching some documentary about Louis someone or another.”_

_“Wow okay first of all Louis XIV was the longest reigning king of France not just someone or another.”_

_“I’m sorry but I care about this much.” She squeezed the thumb and forefinger millimetres apart._

_Jimmy was about to argue back but he was interrupted._

_“Well as much as we’d all love to hear about Jimmy getting laid I’m going to have to interrupt to introduce our new member of staff.” Dave announced, Jimmy hadn’t even seen him enter the room too busy with his markings. He was an old friend so he let the joke slide but he still felt a blush burning his cheeks._

_“Mr Zeller will be taking over from Mrs Chlumsky as our new division chair of music theory.” Jimmy was being rude and not even looking at the new guy he was behind in his marking thanks to spending the night out. He heard Dave go on about the new guy’s qualifications and how highly recommended he was. Jimmy gave in and looked up from his work, the same pair of eyes that he had lured into a broom closet were staring straight at him he had a sly grin on his face. Was it too late to run out the room screaming? Should he quit his job, oh fuck._

_Dave finished his speech and the rest of his co-workers all crowded round the new guy to shake his hand._

_“He is cute.” He heard Stephanie say to him, a jealous surge ran through him, which he immediately stamped out. It was a one night only deal they weren’t married._

_Once the crowd dispersed, the guy was staring at Jimmy, the only person not to have moved, Jimmy let out a slow breath before getting up._

_“Hi,” Brian held out his hand and Jimmy stared down at it._

_“Can I talk to you real quick?” He never really gave Brian a chance to answer just pulled him out of the staff room and into a stationery closet._

_“You do love your closets don’t you?”_

_Jimmy ignored him, he felt his resolve dangling by a thread, this prick was smooth and Jimmy already wanted to jump him._

_“What the hell are you doing here?”_

_“Excuse me?”_

_“I thought you were just some schmuck in a crappy band now you’re working here?”_

_“You don’t hit on guys much do you?” Brian said drolly, Jimmy had to take a deep breath to let the remark slide._

_“Can we just keep this,” Jimmy pointed a finger back and forth between the two of them. “Professional.”_

_“So, what you’re saying is.” Brian crowded Jimmy into a corner placing his hands on the wall either side of Jimmy’s head who was defiantly staring back at him. “If I did this.” Brian placed a kiss on the side of Jimmy’s neck, grinning against his skin. “That wouldn’t be professional.”_

_“I think that’s called sexual harassment.” Jimmy hated himself but he was grinning._

_“Oh well we don’t want that.” Brian stepped back. “I mean what would happened if a guy dragged another member of staff into a supply closet.” His voice was so low it was going straight to Jimmy’s dick and he wanted to curse even the sun out._

_“Asshole.” Jimmy sneered a grin sliding onto his face making Brian laugh._

_“That’s me.”_

_The door was pushed open Stephanie waltzing in, “I needed some paper…” She said bemused, looking at their slightly heated faces._

_Jimmy quickly grabbed her a stack of A4 paper and shoved it into her hands._

_“I was just showing Mr Zeller the stationery.”_

_She raised an eyebrow at Jimmy._

_“Ooookay that sounds plausible good try. Brian is it?” She asked looking at him, he nodded at her. “You’re from that band right?”_

_“Meat wand?” Brian enthused, Jimmy let his head fall into his hands, just great._

_“Oh, oh…. Jimmy Price you sly dog.” She gave him a wink and he seriously questioned why he was friends with her. “I’ll see you at lunch Jimmy, will prince charming be joining us?”_

_Brian laughed, and Jimmy could see he was already fond of Stephanie, great now the two of them would gang up on him. “Sure.” She gave them a quick wave and left, Jimmy could hear her laughing down the corridor._

_“Call me Mr Zeller again it was hot.”_

_“Oh shut up.” Jimmy pushed him out of the door._

 Danny looked tired when he came back from work, it was nine in the morning and Jimmy was sitting on the porch he watched as his brother sat down beside him.

“Can I ask you something?”

Danny nodded through a yawn.

“Why did I come back?”

“From where?”

“The dead, Danny why or how did I come back?” Jimmy turned to look at him, trying to mask his irritation.

“Uh….” Danny scratched his face considering the question. “Dunno.” He finally shrugged. “I’m going to bed don’t get into any trouble.”

“Useful as ever Danny.” Jimmy called back but his brother was already halfway to his room.

He decided he wasn’t going to wait until group to apologise to Beverly, it was making him feel sick the bad air between them and he wanted to fix it. He grabbed a coat that wasn’t his own and started walking the block. He practiced what he was going to say, even talking to himself no one paid him much attention it was oddly comforting to be ignored again.

 _Please be Bev that answers the door. Please be Bev that answers the door._ Jimmy repeated under his breath as he knocked on the door.

“What do you want?”

Relief hit Jimmy, she was still angry and he didn’t blame her.

“To apologise…grovel if need be.” He gave her a smile and Beverly stared him down before relenting.

“Come in then.” She moved to allow him into the house, shutting the door behind her. “Start begging whilst I make some tea.”

Jimmy followed after her into the kitchen, he took a seat at the kitchen counter. “I’m sorry, really sorry I was just so mad about Abigail why her family would disposed of her like yesterday’s garbage. I didn’t want to see that happen to you or any of the others.”

“I know Jim, but you shouldn’t have shut us all out.” She filled a teapot up similar to the one Alana had used and dropped the red power into it, stirring it a few times before setting it on the cooker to boil. “Brian told me I just had to give you some space and you would come around.”

“Know it all.” Jimmy muttered and Bev smiled at him.

“He’s a good guy, I like him. I’m secretly pleased you didn’t come to the meeting actually Brian told me everything and before you ask I’m sworn to secrecy so no I can’t tell you anything.”

Jimmy gave her a hurt look. “That’s so unfair.”  


“Payback for shouting at me, you’ll think again before you do that.” She pointed at him and Jimmy didn’t argue back.  She took the pot off the cooker and poured it into two mugs handing one to Jimmy and taking a seat opposite him.

“This feels weird to have you sitting in my house.”  


“Should I leave?”

“No I don’t mean like that, it’s just I don’t usually get house guests anymore, it’s just me and my mom.”

Jimmy nodded at her, letting the tea warm his cold hands. “You have a beautiful home.”

“Okay calm it Jim, you’re forgiven.” She deadpanned as he laughed at her.

“Do you have any honey?”

She shook her head at him “Don’t think so why?”

“Brian makes the tea with honey and it’s really good.”

“Well I’m sorry I don’t make tea as good as your—“She stopped and Jimmy nearly fell off his chair trying to catch the next word that never came.

“Bev, come on you can’t do that.” Jimmy whined and Beverly took a sip of tea to stop from laughing.

“I’m sorry I know that was mean but you kind of deserve it.”

“Just tell me one thing, anything.” He was pouting and he didn’t care Beverly was already shaking her head at him enjoying herself too much.

“Nope.”

“I take back my apology.” Jimmy huffed folding his arms. “You’re mean.”

“Too late, you love me really.”

“Did you make a move on Alana yet?” Jimmy steered the topic away from Brian he knew Beverly wouldn’t budge she was worse than he was.

“That is also highly classified.” A huge grin split her face and Jimmy rolled his eyes at her.

“That obviously means yes.”

Beverly leaned closer to him and whispered. “I spent the night after group.”

Jimmy leaned back a false look of shock on his face. “Miss Katz you hussy.”

“Not like that, we just talked it was nice. I didn’t drag her into a closet Jimmy.” She grinned before realising what she said.  “Oh wait forget I said that.”

“It’s fine I know all about my escapades in closets.”  He hid his face in his hands.

“He really loves you, you know.” Beverly said honestly and Jimmy couldn’t help but smile.

“Are you allowed to tell me that?”

“It’s pretty obvious Jimmy, he doesn’t keep that one a secret.” 

“I keep having dreams about him, I’ll figure this all out…did he tell you how he died?”

Beverly nodded her head a sombre look on her face “I’m sorry Jimmy.”

Jimmy felt his jaw go slack. “I don’t want to know, let’s just change the subject.” He kept forgetting that Brian was just like him, dead. When he dwelled on the matter it hit him hard, this man that he was certain he loved wasn’t alive he was a social pariah just like him.

There was a lull in conversation before Jimmy decided to ask Beverly the same question he had asked his brother.

“Do you know why we came back?”

Beverly drank the last of her tea and gave him an uncertain look.

“Alana told me no one is really sure, it dates back a few years. It started in Mexico people started dying and reanimating at their funerals scared the shit out of everyone. It would be in the news every so often and people just forgot about it. Then it started happening more often people walking in the streets, people being attacked. She said most of the reanimated were killed at first, weren’t sure what to do with them especially the feral ones. No one knows why some come back and others don’t, that’s why the set up the RPU they need all the research they can gather.” Beverly paused watching Jimmy. “I don’t want to be research Jimmy.”

“I won’t let that happen.” He promised her.


	16. Chapter 16

“If it isn’t prince charming.” Jimmy pretended to swoon at Brian who gave him a grin.

“Hey yourself, you must be in a good mood if I’ve gone from asshole to charming.”

Jimmy got up from the porch and walked over to where Brian was standing at the bottom of the lawn. “You ready to go?”

Jimmy nodded at him, Brian held out his hand and Jimmy wanted to roll his eyes at the fluttery feeling in his stomach, he was like some lovesick teenager. He entwined their fingers together and started walking away from his house.

“I had another dream about you?”

“Did we have clothes on this time?”

“We did.”

“Oh better luck next time.” Brian squeezed his hand and Jimmy elbowed him playfully.

“It was your first day at work, I remembered Dave and Stephanie where are they now?”

Brian looked straight ahead, Jimmy was sure he was ignoring him.

“They’re fine.”

“Is that all I’m going to get? You’re just like Danny, avoiding the question.” Brian dropped Jimmy’s hand roughly.

“I’m nothing like your brother.” Brian steadied himself trying not to raise his voice.

“Then answer the question.” Jimmy raised his voice though, Brian didn’t bite just started walking again leaving Jimmy to glare daggers at his back.

“If you loved me, you would tell me.” Jimmy tried not to sound as weak as he did, Brian slowly turned around, he looked exhausted on the edge of breaking down and Jimmy hated himself for making him feel like that.

“We’ll be late for group.” Brian finally said.

They walked in silence the rest of the way, Jimmy walking a distance behind Brian, he had nothing to say to him. The rest of the group were already at Alana’s sitting round her kitchen table, Jimmy took a seat beside Beverly.

“What’s happened?”

“You were wrong.” Jimmy told her.

Alana handed them all a cup of tea. “So happy you all made it this week.”

“About what?” Beverly asked, talking quietly over Alana welcoming the group.

“You said Brian loved me, he doesn’t he just pities me.” Jimmy thought he had said it quietly but the loud screech of the chair said otherwise.

“Fuck you Jimmy.” Brian said defeated, Jimmy knew he had pushed him too far, could see the tears in his eyes and Jimmy wanted to throw himself onto the fire in the kitchen. Brian walked out the room.

“Well congratulations Jimmy you manage to piss someone off each week.” Freddie told him cheerily.

“You can fuck off as well.” Jimmy told her.

“Oh going for a new record two people in the space of five seconds.”

“Freddie, leave it.” Beverly reasoned to her.

“Is this how the meetings normally start?” Alana tried to joke sitting down at the table with a tray of food. Jimmy couldn’t think of anything other than eating for the next ten minutes thoughts of Brian vanished as he swallowed the chunks of meat. Nothing about the food was displayed in an eye-catching manner, it was cooked raw and it hit every spot in Jimmy’s body. Once he had finished and the buzzing had filled his body, he knew he had to go find Brian.

“Take him this.” Alana gave him a smile handing him a plate of food. The others watched him leave the room muttering slightly to themselves.

It didn’t take long for Jimmy to find Brian he was pleased he hadn’t walked back home. He was sitting in the living room he wiped his face when he glanced Jimmy staring at him.

He handed Brian the dish of food and let him eat in silence, he slowly sat down beside him whilst he was occupied with eating. Once he finished he put the plate down and tried to stand up but Jimmy grabbed his hand.

“Please,” Jimmy gave a soft pull and Brian sat back down staring harshly at him. “I’m sorry, that’s all I seem to be doing these days is apologising.”

“Maybe you should think before you speak.” Brian bitterly retorted.

“Maybe if people just told me the truth.” Jimmy couldn’t help himself. “Fuck, sorry.” He still hadn’t let go of Brian’s hand for fear he would leave him.

“I’m certain I love you Brian.” Jimmy watched as a tear rolled down Brian’s face, he took his face in his hand turning it so he could look Brian in the eyes. He wiped the tear away with his thumb.

“I didn’t think I would come back I just wanted to stop hurting.” Brian barely whispered and Jimmy felt himself break.

“What did you do?”

Brian shook his head. “If you love me you won’t make me tell you.”

Jimmy pulled him into a hug, clinging to him. “I love you so much Jimmy, don’t ever fucking doubt that.” He mumbled into Jimmy’s shoulder.

“I know B.”

Brian pulled back from the hug. “What did you call me?”

Jimmy frowned unsure of what he had done now, could he stop putting his foot in it every single time. “Sorry.”

“No, no it’s fine.” Brian smiled through tears.

The flash of bright light hit Jimmy hard sparking a memory; _He had been lecturing a class about Napoleon and gotten side tracked as he often did in lectures with minor details. Going into depth about Napoleon’s revival of the bee for his royal emblem. The class looked at him bored, pretending to take notes when he looked up he saw Brian taking a seat at the back of the lecture theatre waiting for him to finish the only one in the room who looked genuinely interested._

_“His coat of arms heavily featured the eagle and the bee, the bee being used to symbolise immortality and resurrection—“_

_“Professor Price this lecture was meant to finish fifteen minutes ago.” One student he never knew the name shouted from the back. Jimmy waved them off to go, he watched them all scurry out if they wanted to fail so be it. Brian slowly walked down the stairs once the last student left._

_“Immortality eh, didn’t really work for shorty though did it.”_

_“He was actually average height.” Jimmy corrected, Brian chose to ignore his words and wrapped his arms around him instead._

_“If Dave catches us again we’re done for, he’s already written us up for inappropriate workplace conduct.” Brian kissed Jimmy to shut him up._

_“Maybe if we try hard enough we can get suspended for a week.” Brian ran small kisses down Jimmy’s neck._

_“B...Brian stop.” Jimmy wasn’t pushing him away he could feel Brian grinning at him._

_“Bees are tireless workers,” Brian pulled Jimmy closer running his tongue along his lower lip, “They don’t stop until they get what they want.”_

_“Are you comparing yourself to a bee right now?” Jimmy laughed as Brian just shrugged. “It sounded better in my head.”_

_“Okay B,” Jimmy emphasised letting his mouth pop with the letter, Brian’s eyes darkening. “Let’s go make you a happy worker.”_

“Are you okay?” Brian asked him, he hadn’t realised he had gone silent.

“Yeah, yeah I just, it hit me.”

Brian gave him a confused look.

“I just remembered who Napoleon is.” Jimmy sounded excited, Brian still had his brows knitted down totally lost. “I remembered why I call you B.” Jimmy stressed, the confusion slid from Brian’s face as he smirked.

 “Thanks B.” He kissed him sweetly, could feel the tears cooling on Brian’s face. “It’s not the tea or the food helping me remember it’s you.”

Jimmy finally got it, the flashes and dreams he could trust he wasn’t being manipulated by other’s peoples stories and believing them as his own.


	17. Chapter 17

They went back to the kitchen holding hands, and sat down at the table. Alana gave them a pleased smile, Freddie looked pissed off still. Jimmy didn’t have the energy to apologise to her yet. They listened to introductions, Beverly remained oddly quiet throughout Jimmy was waiting for her to catch his eye so he could ask her.

“Brian do you want to introduce yourself?” Freddie asked politely. Brian gave a small nod and cleared his throat.

“My name is Brian Zeller, I’m thirty seven I’m not an alcoholic.” He let the joke go over some of their heads, Jimmy shook his head at him. “I worked as a music lecturer worked at the same university as Jimmy I would say that’s where we met but that’s not entirely true.”

“You’re so full of it.” Jimmy teased, poking Brian’s side.

“Quit it,” Brian poked him back as they both started laughing, they heard an inpatient tapping noise and stopped what they were doing.

“When you’re quite finished.” Freddie patronised tapping her fingers on the table.

“I fell in love with a history professor who would wake me every morning to tell me what happened on that date and I never got tired of it. I fell in love with my best friend who supported me no matter what, came to watch my band play even though he hated our music.”

“It wasn’t that bad.” Jimmy piped up.

“I had everything i ever needed and then…” Brian bit his bottom lip, he felt everyone’s eyes on him but that was as much as he wanted to say. “That’s it.” Jimmy saw the sadness in his eyes and his head screamed at him to ask questions but knew he couldn’t, instead he placed a chaste kiss on Brian’s cheek. He wasn’t going to push him for more he would find out eventually.

“Okay Beverly you’re up.” Freddie looked but Beverly was staring fixated at the floor. A panic look crossed her face her limps starting to shake slowly, until her whole body started convulsing. She was heaving in breaths trying to fight off whatever was after her, she shook her head as if to shake off the tremors running through her body.

“Beverly, listen to me.” Alana said sternly, kneeling down in front of her to gage eye contact, Beverly wasn’t focusing on anything she was gone and trying to lash out at anyone that came near her.

“What is happening to her?” Freddie stood from the table “What have you done?” She snapped at Alana who was ignoring her and whispering soothing tones to Beverly who was still trying to punch her way out of her seat but she was froze, demonic almost possessed.

“You’re safe here ok, nothing is coming for you, Beverly can you hear me?”

“This is all your fault, and whatever it is your feeding us.” Freddie fumed “What have you done to her.”

“I haven’t done anything, she’s regressing.” Alana gritted her teeth, but kept her tone as calm as possible, she turned to give a quick glare at Freddie.

“Regressing? What are you feeding us?” Freddie wasn’t dropping this.

“I’m not doing this now.” Alana told her firmly. 

Jimmy let them carry on arguing as he moved to where Beverly was sitting in her chair still shaking her head, she kept whispering no under her breath and it was beginning to unnerve all of them. He grabbed her hand and held onto them tightly, her eyes wet with tears as she heaved in a lungful of air, coughing violently over and over.

“Alana do something!” Both Freddie and Jimmy shouted at the same time making them give each other a look as Alana shook her head.

“There’s nothing I can do, let her ride it out.”

Jimmy gaped at her disbelief in his eyes, whatever was happening Alana had seen it many times before, just another secret for Jimmy to crack.

“Beverly look at me.” Jimmy waited until his friend focused her eyes onto him, at least she was paying attention, “Count backwards from a hundred.” Jimmy started counting with her at first she couldn’t get the words out still trying to breathe, uncoordinated and erratic. When they got to fifty Beverly chest was heaving but Jimmy could hear her counting down with him, they got to twenty before Beverly stopped, a look of horror crossing her face.

“I saw him.” She said trying not to panic again she was staring at Jimmy.

“Who?”

“The guy….who did this to me…I know him.”

Jimmy was about to say something when he felt it, the wrists he was holding in his hands they had a pulse, he jumped back in shock.

 “Do you know his name?” Alana asked tentatively, Jimmy was still reeling from the low pulsing beats in Beverly’s wrists he only moved when Brian grabbed his hand to pull him up.

“No…I don’t think so.” Beverly winced in pain rubbing her forehead with her palm.

“Beverly, I think we should go.” Freddie said flatly “This isn’t good for you…she isn’t good for you.” Beverly didn’t need to look at who Freddie was staring daggers at.

“Freddie I’m fine, please.”

“You’re not fine Beverly, I’m leaving and you need to come now.”

“You can stay as long as you like.” Alana gave her a reassuring smile and Beverly gave her a small nod, there wasn’t any place she rather be.

“Are you serious?” Freddie huffed she was pacing the small kitchen.

“I’ll walk with you.” Jack told her, giving the group an uncertain look like he really didn’t have time to deal with whatever the hell had just happened, he just wanted to go home and see Bella.

“Brian, Jimmy are you coming?”

“I’ll leave in a bit I want to make sure Beverly is ok.” Jimmy told her

“I’m staying if he is.” Brian gave her a small shrug and Freddie only nodded “Just be careful around her ok.”

Brian got up to help Jack walk to the door with Freddie, he was getting better but still found it difficult to move. Once they left the room Alana started another pot of tea.

“Is it wise for her to be drinking that?”

“Totally fine Jimmy it’s nothing more than a few spices.” Jimmy raised his brow but let it go.

“Is it okay if I go lie down?” Beverly asked her voice weak.

“Of course.” Alana held out her hand for Beverly to take, she slowly pulled herself out of the chair slightly shaken. Jimmy watched them leave the room uncertain if he should leave the two of them alone.

“Are you ok? Brian asked when he came back, Jimmy gave him a small smile.

“Just worried about her, what was that all about?”

“I’ve no idea.” He pulled Jimmy closer letting him rest his head on his shoulder.

“Freddie says she’s going to find out.” Brian mumbled to him

“She will, she’s good at what she does.” Jimmy felt himself melting slowly in Brian’s arms, the tension ebbing away he closed his eyes forgetting where they were, picturing them in their own home, happy.

“You can stay as long as you like, make yourself comfortable.” Alana interrupted them, making them break apart from the hug, she grabbed two cups of tea and headed back for the stairs.

“Come on.” Brian lead Jimmy into the living room sitting down beside him, the house was so dusty and old everything creaked, even the rugs seemed to be squeaking.

“I should be getting back before Danny realises I’m not there.” Even to his own ears Jimmy didn’t believe himself.

“We’ll leave whenever you want.” Brian told him, letting Jimmy rest his head on his chest, making himself more comfortable the thought of going anywhere quickly vanishing.

“Where have you been staying?”

“With my sisters, well they keep passing me around.” Jimmy grinned slightly, trying to remember Brian’s sisters. “I’m staying with Amy at the moment, Carlie got a new boyfriend and apparently I was cramping her style.” Jimmy let out a small laugh.

“I guess no one wants their zombie brother lurking in the shadows when you’re bringing home a date.” Brian rolled his eyes in jest as Jimmy laughed again.

“Have I met them?”

“Yeah, they love you more than me.” Brian smiled but Jimmy frowned, he couldn’t remember them as hard as he tried.

“Do you think I should check on Beverly?”

“She’ll be fine Jim.” Brian promised him, grabbing the blanket that was hanging behind the sofa he threw it over the pair of them, placing a kiss on Jimmy’s head. 

“She likes Alana a lot but,” Jimmy shook his head uncertain “Beverly has a pulse.” Jimmy tried not to say it too loudly.

“She can’t have a pulse, she’s dead.”

“Brian, I felt it. Alana does too she looks perfectly healthy a lifer in fact.” Jimmy pressed two fingers to his neck to check if he felt anything, he didn’t. “You feel it though don’t you, when you see the meat it just takes over consumes you. The need to eat, you would fight your own mother for the last piece.” Jimmy felt Brian pull him closer trying to comfort him. “I’m scared to find out what it is”


	18. Chapter 18

Jimmy was watching his therapist pace back and forth behind his desk, trying to shout down his phone, his teeth gritted and his tone was cutting even Jimmy’s ears.

“Is this your way of getting back at me? Just sleeping with anything with a pulse?”

Jimmy tried to block out Chilton’s voice trying to be a model zombie slouching in the leather chair letting his head loll back and trying to avoid any eye contact.

“You’re always at that club Nightshade, I don’t know what the fuck has gotten into you lately.”

Jimmy usually avoided watching day time TV as he hated dramas and chat shows and now he was being forced to listen to one, he fought hard not to roll his eyes or just get up and throw the phone out of the window.

“Don’t bring Matthew into this, yes you know that’s his name and he means nothing.” Chilton let out an irritated sigh before giving up entirely and hanging up the phone, closing his eyes for a few moments before allowing a calm to settle on his face.

“Mr Price.”

Jimmy tilted his head to the side to acknowledge he heard him, but still kept his eyes lowered.

“Apologies for the indiscretion I know how much you despise my phone calls.”

“It’s fine.”

“Oh so you do remember my calls?” Chilton paused whilst trying to find his pen a quizzical look on his face, Jimmy ignored the look and feigned ignorance.

“What other phone calls? I’m sorry have we met before?” Jimmy asked slowly, his brows pulled into a line of confusion, Chilton studied him for a second before slamming his desk drawer shut and talking a seat opposite his patient.

“Your brother tells me you’ve been asking questions about your reformation, does this interest you now?”

Jimmy gave a slow shrug mentally kicking himself because he had asked Danny more questions knowing full well anything he said was now open to scrutiny.

“I don’t remember.” Jimmy finally settled on, he wasn’t going to get into a pissing contest with Chilton, the quicker he could leave the better.

“So how are you feeling?” Chilton leaned back in his chair bored, repeating the same trite questions. Only a few hours ago Jimmy walked home with Brian hand in hand watching the sun rise a smile ghosted his face thinking of how Brian had lingered on his porch for as long as possible before Danny got back from work.  Jimmy hadn’t had anymore dreams or flashes which he was disappointed about.

Jimmy rattled off the same answers trying hard not to make them sound rehearsed, Chilton looked bored but he couldn’t mask the edge of irritation that was running through him, his eyes kept darting to his phone, ignoring Jimmy completely.

That had been hours ago and Jimmy still remembered it perfectly even the minor details of Chilton’s wilting gardenias on his desk. The TV was playing to itself in the basement as Jimmy read his book, occasionally stopping to think about Beverly and her newly found pulse. Was she a lifer now? It bothered him he didn’t have a pulse, wasn’t sure what that would even mean. How could he explain that to his brother?

“We have been too accepting of the brainers, they are dangerous. More reports of innocent people being attacked in the streets from these vicious creatures. I think it’s time we took action as the RPU seem to be idly standing by.”

The irritating voice caught Jimmy’s attention as he found the remote to turn up the TV, some Blonde woman in her forties with too much make up sitting too tightly in her chair talking to a news anchor. Her name was on the screen underneath her job title, Jimmy had never heard of the ‘Human Protection against Brainers’  but whoever they were this Ms Du Maurier was the president of it.

“Ms Du Maurier, the RPU has issued a statement stating any reanimated that are a danger to society are immediately quarantined. That most pose no threat or have the capabilities to attack civilians.”

“Most, is not all though.” She curtly replied “It is a well-known fact that Brainer’s abilities to function is dependent on their reanimation time. Now their reanimation time is getting quicker, we’re talking minutes here. They are not human they are diseased. They are walking strains that we allow to walk past our children in the street.”

The news anchor nodded his head beside her, so much for unbiased journalism, there wasn’t anyone to defend the reanimated. Jimmy scoffed at the TV it was this type of scaremongering that had him confined to a basement.

“However here in Baltimore there have been no suggested reports of brainer attacks?” The news anchor asked turning to look at the camera giving the viewers at home a reassuring smile. Du Maurier shook her head gravely.

“We were made aware quite recently of grave robbing.” She paused to clasp her hands together on the desk, whatever she had to say she was taking great pleasure in taking her time. Jimmy sat closer to the TV.  “Now this information has not been released to the public yet, however under my control I wanted to be the first to release the news and to inform the public the way in which to combat this situation.” The news anchor tried to keep her face steady but Jimmy noticed the quick startled look she gave to someone above the camera.

“Several years ago you may remember the case of Peter Bernardone.”

“The first to reanimate.” The news anchor reminded viewers at home, Jimmy couldn’t remember ever hearing about this.

“That we know, yes. Organs are taken from the body before burial and placed in a handy bag.” She stopped to pick up an empty bag showing the size of it. “Like this one, and lined inside the coffin if they are not donated prior to the event. Now what you may not know is Mr Bernardone was able to claw his way out of the ground by eating said organs, he was feral he attacked a hundred and fifty people that day.” She picked up a piece of paper from the desk. “Eye witness say the creature was of super human strength, he was able to run at a speed no one had seen before. He torn into bodies like fresh bread only after eating the brains first.”

“Ms Du Maurier, if I can just interrupt, surely if this were true we would have heard about this now, Mr Bernardone was killed by police for attacking people in the street, but reports never claimed more than twenty or more people.”

“I will agree hearing this now may come as a shock, but for too long now the government have been covering their tracks, it is time we took greater measures to prevent anymore reanimating. Our investigations have found those that live near cemeteries are brainers feeding other reanimated for sustenance.”

“This all seems very Hollywood, the reanimated eating brains?” The news reporter tilted her head on the side shrugging off the idea.

“The reanimated are coming back from the dead by harvesting organs, this is not a Hollywood notion this is a serious threat. They are becoming stronger. We need to step up mass burnings put an end to the reanimated, if you’re housing a brainer, phone the HPAB and we will collect them. Do not waste your time with the RPU they are overcrowded and clueless.” She sneered.

Jimmy’s body started to tremor he clutched his hands tightly to calm himself, he felt a nauseating kick hit him hard, fell to the floor dry heaving. He would have thrown up if there was anything…or anyone in his stomach. It all made sense and Jimmy fought not to let it, he knew that meat wasn’t animal but yet he still ate it, without it he went feral nearly attacked Brian when he had fetched him some.

“You cannot seriously be suggesting people go out into the streets and set people on fire.”

“I’m saying we must do everything we can to protect our families and children.” Du Maurier’s tone was grave.

Jimmy smashed at the TV until it went quiet, the report cutting off. He had to get out, had to leave couldn’t stand the wooden walls burning around him. He raced up the stairs smashing through the locked door. Fuck, Jimmy turned to look at the damage Danny would definitely notice that. He spun around surveying his options, what the hell should he do? He needed Brian but where the fuck did he live. Jimmy let out a desperate shriek kicking over the coffee table. _Thinkthinkthinkthink_ Jimmy willed himself to remember where Brian’s sister lived it must be close. He paced the living room chewing the inside of his cheek, his body still shaking he felt a surge of fear gnawing away at his body and he couldn’t stand to be in the house anymore, he made a run for the back door.


	19. Chapter 19

Jimmy was running, unaware of how fast. Just knew he couldn’t stop. The necessity to breathe was not a factor. His mind was racing trying to force a memory to bubble to the surface anything he could remember about Brian’s sisters. There were people on the street now, could hear them all chattering away some louder than others. Some standing outside their front doors following Jimmy’s movements, he turned down an alley and took the back roads instead, not wanting anymore glares pointed at him. Brian had mentioned two sisters but Jimmy knew he had three. He was clenching his fists hard trying to think, yes three no brothers they were a close family. Where the hell did they live, he couldn’t start pounding on doors and hoping Brian was in one of them. That news report had obviously been seen by half the neighbourhood, Jimmy could hear shouting and cheers. He avoided the noise and took a different path.

He ran down a street that felt familiar to him, the houses were all painted white with delicate gardens at the front. He slowed his pace to a jog as he studied the houses closely, he knew this house he had walked to the same front gate before. He bristled for a moment hand ready to knock on the door.

“Jimmy?”

He heard the gritted whisper and followed the sound, looking up near the roof.

“Wait there, meet me round the back.”

Jimmy gave her a smile and nodded, relieved he wasn’t going crazy that this house did in fact belong to Freddie’s parents. He walked into the back yard waiting for her, she was carefully walking along the edge of the roof after sneaking out of the window. She jumped onto the lower balcony before jumping again with a loud thump on the ground. She winced at the movement, Jimmy held out a hand to help her up.

“Thanks.”

“Do you know where Brian lives?” Jimmy rushed out, he was leading Freddie out of the garden by the hand still, ensuring she was still following him.

“Way to make a girl feel special Jim.” She joked, jogging alongside him now “I do though, come on.” She turned across the street and Jimmy followed her, they didn’t say much just carried on running. It was a few miles away and Jimmy would never have found the house on his own, he couldn’t remember ever seeing the place.

“I think it’s this one.” Freddie stopped in front of the townhouse, she sounded out of breathe.

Jimmy decided to take his chances and knocked on the door, he waited a few minutes before the door was slowly opened a young woman staring at him.

“Jim…Jimmy?” She reeled back as if she’d seen a ghost.

“Is Brian here?” Jimmy didn’t want to process the look she was giving him or what it meant.

“Jimmy…I thought you were dead?” Her voice sounded small, tears filling her eyes.

“I am,” Jimmy said unsure trying to peer around the door to see if Brian did actually live here. 

“Danny said.” She was mumbling to herself and Jimmy wasn’t catching what she was saying, he was studying her closely now.

“Amy?”

She looked up at him, a tear sliding down her face.

“I’m fine, see.” Jimmy opened his arms out wide to show her.

“We went to your funeral.” Now it was Jimmy’s time to pull back, his brows burrowing in confusion, he didn’t have one did he?

“Brian!” Jimmy shouted, making Amy jump slightly.

“You need to leave.” Amy told him, trying to shut the door. Jimmy was about to yell again when he appeared standing behind his sister.

“What are you doing here?” Brian frowned at him and Jimmy took a step back away from the door Freddie standing beside him now, arms crossed.

“I need you to come with us, it’s not safe anymore.” Jimmy pleaded he hadn’t told this to Freddie yet been too busy running to explain. “Please.”

Brian looked at his crying sister and whispered something to her, Jimmy watched them closely but couldn’t hear what he was saying she nodded at Brian and flashed a hurt look at Jimmy before leaving.

“You shouldn’t have come here.” Brian said defeated.

“It’s Alana, she’s feeding us and then the news report.” Jimmy rattled off, shaking couldn’t get his words to make sense. He felt himself being pulled into secure arms clinging to Brian for all his worth. It’s not good for your recovery.” He mumbled into his shoulder.

“I don’t care about that, we have bigger problems.” Jimmy pulled back from the hug, placing his hands gently on Brian’s face holding him. “Are you coming with me,” Jimmy turned to look at Freddie. “With us.” Brian turned his head to kiss the palm of Jimmy’s hand that was resting on his face.

“Yes.” He told him, and Jimmy felt his pulse thrum.

“We need to get Beverly.” Freddie told them both as they began jogging again.

“We’ll go to her house, I know where she lives.” Jimmy would have gone their first if he was thinking straight.

“No. She won’t be there.” Freddie stopped “She’ll be at Alana’s.”  


Jimmy turned cold. “We need to go get her now.” Brian grabbed his hand and forced him to start running again but Jimmy was finding it more difficult this time. He was wheezing and coughing his body starting to shake.

“Jimmy you’re not fucking doing this now!” Brian shouted at him, trying to shake him to keep going.

“What?” Jimmy coughed out, his body starting to burn at him the pain in his lungs spreading like wildfire through his body.

“Jimmy!” Brian grabbed him roughly, spinning round to face him. “Come back, don’t let it happen now please, just wait, please.” He could hear Brian shouting but it sounded quiet could see the scared look on his face. Jimmy closed his eyes, drawing in shattered breaths, could hear the air smashing into his lungs, tried to block it out.

“He’s regressing.”

Jimmy heard Brian tell Freddie but the rest was blurred as he screamed until the shaking stopped. When he opened his eyes Brian was holding a hand out to him to take, Jimmy grabbed it and they all started running again. This time Jimmy could keep up with them.

Jimmy had questions, he needed to ask what the fuck was going on, what the hell just happened to him? But he needed to keep moving, they had turned round to head back to Alana’s house but they were finding it difficult getting past the hordes of people standing in the street shouting, some were marching in the direction they were running. Jimmy knew then that something was wrong.

They slowed their pace past the cemetery to Alana’s house, there were fires everywhere, the flames flickering up into the night air, cheering on the crowds who were chanting.

“Come on.” Brian manoeuvred Jimmy and Freddie around the crowd until they stopped dead in their tracks, Jimmy then started running to the house.

“Jimmy!” Brian grabbed him, digging his feet into the ground to get him to stop.

“She’s in there.” He cried, Alana’s house was burning away, flames fighting their way out of the windows, curling around the small vintage cottage.

“Jimmy, you can’t!” Brian shouted above the crowd so Jimmy could hear him, Jimmy was trying to fight his way out of Brian’s arms. Freddie stood transfixed, her body shaking, paralysed with fear, couldn’t move. Chants of ‘burn, burn, burn.’ Covered their heads drowning them with a bitter taste in their mouths.

Jimmy struggled and pushed his way free, pushing his way through the crowds to the house, Brian shouting after him. Jimmy didn’t stop, his hands out in front of him to push the crowd away from him. A burst of flames roared out of the door denying him an entrance, he felt himself being pulled up, didn’t fight it this time.

“Jimmy please.” Brian was desperate, Jimmy hung limply in his arms, coughing harshly his tears cooling his face.  He sunk to the ground, the crowd dispersing now, their chants carrying off with them satisfied that the house was reduced to nothing more than debris. Jimmy sunk to the ground the ability to hold himself up any longer had well and truly past. His teary eyes focused on the house, if he had gotten here sooner he could have saved her. Saved them both.

“Jim,” Brian urged him, Jimmy turned his head to look at what Brian was looking at, she was there standing beside Freddie.

“Beverly?” Jimmy was already up and running the short distance to her, pulling her into his arms.

“What’s happened? Where’s Alana?”

Jimmy shook his head, didn’t want to answer the questions thrown at him, he clung to her harder, making sure she was really standing there.

“You’re okay, you’re fine?” Jimmy pulled back to look at her face, but Beverly was staring up at the cremated house.

“What…happened?” Her eyes were filling with tears as she brushed past Jimmy walking closer to the house, Brian stopped her from getting any closer.

“Beverly, we need to leave, it’s not safe here.”

“Where’s Alana?”

“Beverly, we’ll explain but we need to go.” Brian calmly told her, she was shaking her head at him, tears spilling down her face.

“I’m not going anywhere without Alana.”

“They killed her Beverly!” Freddie shouted, making everyone startle. “They burnt the house to the fucking ground whilst they all stood cheering.” Her face was flushed, anger consuming her as she marched over to them.

“She was feeding us people, Beverly. What the fuck did she think was going to happen?”

“It’s all over the news.” Jimmy told Beverly, who was lost in her own head, eyes unfocused.

“She lied to all of us and now she’s screwed us all ove—“

Beverly slapped her hard across the face, Brian immediately reeled Beverly back in lest she hit the redhead again. Freddie’s mouth hung slack she rubbed at her jaw turning her head to look back at Beverly.

“You knew didn’t you” Freddie sneered at her.

“This isn’t helping Freddie, we need to go now.”

“To where? We can’t just ride off into the sunset they want us all dead.” Freddie spun round to shout at Jimmy.

“I know somewhere, come on.”

“Oh you always fucking do,” Freddie retorted to Brian. “I seem to remember you leading us to Alana in the first place.”

“I’m not waiting here for them to come back, we’re leaving now.” Jimmy told Freddie who was rubbing at her jaw again, trying to let the anger wash over her.

“Beverly I’m sorry but we need to go.” Jimmy put an arm around her shoulder, urging to her to move again, she wiped at her face, but the tears left fresh track marks on her cheeks, she gave him the smallest of nods and started walking, following alongside Brian.

“Are you coming or not?” Brian asked her, Freddie thought it through it wasn’t like she had many other options. She had been living in the attic of her aunt’s house and that was anything but fun.

“Fine.” She threw her hands up and followed after them keeping her distance from Beverly.


	20. Chapter 20

Jimmy didn’t know where they were driving to but Brian did, he had hotwired the first car he found at the edge of the street, it amazed Jimmy that Brian was actually a qualified teacher and not just some hooligan. Freddie and Beverly sat in the back, looking out of their respective windows not daring to glance a look at each other, instead focusing on the street lights outside lighting up the city.

Jimmy had his head rested to the side of his seat watching Brian driving, it had a calming effect on him, worries of burning houses and flesh suppers were background noise. They had been driving a while, leaving the streets littered with people behind them. Their home made fire bombs and chants fading into the distance.

They pulled up to a secluded house Jimmy noted how peaceful it was studying it closely until it became familiar. They were surrounded by forest if anyone was coming after them they would have a difficult job finding them. Jimmy let out a small raspy exhale, still trying to become accustom to the sensation. Brian had already opened the door and led the other two inside. Jimmy took his time walking up to the house looking around at the overgrown garden and the dried up pond out front. It was obvious no one had been here in a while it was just forgotten about.

“Are you coming?”

“Is this our house?” Jimmy stopped still at the door, Brian gave him a sad smile nodding his head slightly. Jimmy felt it, knew he had lived here for five years with Brian so why had Danny lied to him. That basement wasn’t his it was their parent’s old house, Jimmy let the anger wash over him now wasn’t the time to focus on his brother he just wanted to sleep.

Jimmy followed Brian into the house locking the door behind him. He stopped to observe the pictures on the walls most of it art work hung neatly. He pulled one frame from the wall a picture of himself and Brian wrapped up in winter clothing, their faces flushed red from the cold, a puppy covered in snow was sitting happily in Brian’s arms.

“What happened to the dog?” Jimmy asked when he felt Brian’s presence.

“Rosie’s been looking after him.”

Jimmy blinked back tears handing the frame back to Brian, didn’t want to look at it anymore. The faces smiling at him weren’t the same faces now he had lost everything and still wasn’t sure how. The house was a slap in the face everything that was taken from him was here.

Freddie was walking around the house looking at the same pictures smiling at them slightly, Beverly was sitting transfixed on the sofa Jimmy sat down beside her and took her hand in his.

“Are you okay?”

She just shook her head tears still spilling down her face. He pulled her into a hug letting her sob onto his shoulder stroking her hair. He watched Brian pull Freddie into the kitchen talking quietly to her, every so often their gazes would flicker to where Jimmy was sitting.

“She… never…hurt anyone.” Beverly’s voice hitched it was quiet, broken and Jimmy had to lean in closer to hear her.

“I know.”

“I knew she was taking organs.” Beverly wiped at her face. “At first I was angry at her I mean what kind of sicko does that? But it made us better.” Beverly looked down at herself, her stitches all gone her skin warm with a pulse. She still only had one arm but she had accepted that. “She made us human again Jimmy.” She blinked a tear falling down her cheek. “I loved her.” Jimmy pulled her back into the hug, starting to cry himself. He felt sick his skin itched away at him the urge to start running was consuming him, he just held Beverly tighter.

“It’s late we should get some sleep.” Freddie finally found the courage to speak, she had been crying herself. “Beverly I’m sorry, I’m really sorry.”

Beverly pulled away from Jimmy, standing up on shaking feet.

“Do you have a spare room?” Beverly ignored Freddie directing her question at Brian who nodded at her.

“Yeah, we have a few come on I’ll show you both.”

Jimmy watched as they both followed after Brian, he could feel Beverly’s tears still on his shoulder, his breathing sounded harsh to his own ears, before a wave of panic could take over him Brian had returned standing in front of him. He held out a hand and Jimmy took it he was led to a bedroom, which used to be there’s.

 “Isn’t this bad for my recovery?” Jimmy said drolly, Brian stepped closer to him, tilting Jimmy’s head up slightly closing the distance between them.

“I think that ship has sailed honey.” Brian cocked a grin at him resting his forehead on Jimmy’s they both looked filthy covered in residue from the fire. “You’ve already regressed.” Brian let his hand travel up Jimmy’s chest until his palm rested over his heart smiling to himself. “I love you.”

Jimmy wiped the tear away from Brian’s face with his thumb. “I won’t let anyone take you from me again.”

Jimmy pressed a soft kiss to Brian’s forehead trailing kisses down his cheek, until he felt warm lips capture his own the hurt and anger draining away from him.

“I love you too.” Jimmy watched as another tear slipped down Brian’s face, he tentatively placed his hand over Brian’s chest and felt the low thud beating in sync with his own, he felt his head being lifted again, Brian cradling his face with his hands pressing a demanding kiss to his lips. Pushing him back against the bed until he was lying down. Brian straddling his hips, deepening the kiss, Jimmy pulled him closer, lifting his head to delve his tongue into Brian’s mouth, he felt the scratch of stubble rubbing against his skin and he couldn’t get enough. Jimmy had missed this, missed them.

“Do you want to do this now?” Brian asked into Jimmy’s mouth, his hands pulling at Jimmy’s shirt before he finished his question. Jimmy nodded tugging at Brian’s lip before running kisses down his neck, letting his hands travel over his body.

_“I just think it’s for the best Brian.” Jimmy had tears in his eyes but was fighting hard not to let them fall, he needed to stay strong, couldn’t let Brian see how much this was killing him._

_“Where has this come from, you’re really going to end this?” Brian was trying to get Jimmy to look him in the eyes but he wouldn’t, he kept his gaze to the floor. “You’ve been talking to your brother again you let his twisted words pick away at you.”_

_“He’s right, what does a guy in his thirties want with a guy in his fifties?” Jimmy finally looked at him, Brian’s heart breaking into two, this wasn’t how he planned their summer vacation. Danny had come over late before they left for their trip drunk again. Hollering at Jimmy dragging him off to some shithole diner to pour his mistakes onto his brother. Brian hated him, wanted him the fuck out of their lives._

_“Jimmy, please.” Brian walked the short distance to Jimmy, trying to reach out to him but Jimmy pulled back at the last second._

_“You deserve someone better Brian.”_

_“What are you talking about?”_

_“I don’t fucking know,” Jimmy stuttered. “What if you suddenly decide I’m too old for you or you want kids or fuck Brian I just want you to be happy.”_

_“I am happy.” Brian reached out and this time Jimmy let himself be pulled into his arms, couldn’t fight the tears anymore, he knew his brother’s words had got to him they always did. He usually tried avoiding him at all costs, but going with him to diner was the only way to get him away from the house. There Danny had cut away at him his vicious words pulling Jimmy into the ground beneath him._

_“When you came into that bar that night I knew, I just knew we’d end up together and I’m not just talking about that one night you’re my everything Jim.”_

_“I love you so much B, can’t you see I’m giving you the chance to walk away now before you end up hating me.”_

_“Why would I ever hate you?”_

_“Danny’s wife just left him and he’s drinking again and I don’t want that for us.”_

_“You’re nothing like your brother Jimmy, you’re always comparing yourself to him, all his fuck ups you blame himself. He cheated on his wife for twenty years good for her for leaving his sorry ass. You’re nothing like him.” Brian reiterated, lifting Jimmy’s head so he was looking straight into his eyes._

_“Fuck it, I was going to wait ‘til the end of the week somewhere more romantic but nothing else will convince you.” Brian slowly dropped down on to one knee in front of Jimmy, he watched as Brian pulled a small black box from his jacket._

_“I met you nine years ago in some seedy downtown bar and it was the best night of my life. I wake up every morning beside you and wonder how I got this lucky. You always stand by me no matter what, and sure we argue all the time but the makeup sex is always fucking awesome.”_

_Jimmy rolled his teary eyes as Brian smirked up at him. “I don’t want anyone else I’ll never be as happy or as loved as I am with you. Don’t ever doubt that, don’t doubt us. I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” Brian took a shaky breath opening the box, it was a silver band with an engraving on the inside of it, Jimmy couldn’t make out the words from where he was stood, his eyes filling with tears. “Jimmy Theodore Price will you marry me?” Brian’s gaze never wavered from Jimmy’s even though the nerves were threatening to choke him. Jimmy sunk to the floor in front of Brian, looking at the ring._

_“Are you sure?”_

_“Of course I’m sure.” Brian laughed._

_“I don’t know what I did to deserve you Brian.” Jimmy gave him a tearful smile, nodding his head slowly. “Please don’t say my middle name ever again.”_

_“Is that a yes?” Brian asked unsure trying not to get excited until he heard the words._

_“Yes.” The grin that split Jimmy’s face instantly squashed any tension in Brian’s body he pulled him closer into a kiss before remembering the ring. He took the band from the box and passed it to Jimmy letting him read the inscription first._

_‘To Honey love B.’_

_Jimmy laughed “Brian Zeller you are the worst.” His fiancé gave a small bow before slipping the ring on Jimmy’s finger._

_“Too late you already said yes.” He slowly pushed Jimmy to the ground entwining their hands together as Brian straddled his hips. “Now I think you owe me make up sex.” Brian leaned down to run his tongue along Jimmy’s lower lip teasing him with a kiss. “And proposal sex.” Brian grinded himself down onto Jimmy’s lap grinning at the soft moan falling from Jimmy’s lips. “And vacation sex.”_

_“Fuck, Brian just fuck me already.” Brian let his head roll back laughing, before doing what he was told._

 

Jimmy opened his eyes, the sun creeping through the curtains pulling him away from his dream. Brian was already awake lying on his side watching Jimmy.

“Good morning.”

Before reality hit, Jimmy could bask in the afterglow of sharing a bed with the man he loved, waking up beside him pretending everything was right with the world. They would either go to work or laze around the house talking their dog for a walk. Or go on a road trip to nowhere in particular.

“You’re my fiancé.”

“You certain?” Brian grinned his tone teasing.

“Yes, why didn’t we marry?”

Jimmy watched as Brian’s face dropped, his eyes filled with sadness avoiding Jimmy’s face.

“Oh, right.” Jimmy felt reality smack him in the back of the head, they were on the run they were zombies with a pulse. Jimmy let out a sigh.

“What happened to my ring?” This time Brian smiled at Jimmy caressing his face before sitting up. He pulled one of the silver bands from his fingers holding it up.

“Kept it safe for you.”

Jimmy held out his hand for Brian to put it back on, letting it fit snugly back in place.

“It still fits, it’s been a while.” Brian pressed a kiss to Jimmy’s temple, as a frown marred Jimmy’s face.

“What do you mean?”

“Nothing, forget it.” Brian tried to shrug it off but Jimmy wasn’t having it.

“I’ve only been dead a few months, we haven’t been separated that long.” Jimmy sat up in bed mimicking Brian’s posture who was looking out of the window.

“That’s right isn’t it?”

“We need a shower, come on.” Brian wanted the conversation anywhere but here but Jimmy grabbed his arm before he could get up.

“Please Brian.”

“It’s been four years Jim.” The words cut at Jimmy like a knife, _four years, four fucking years._

“What, how?”

Brian wrapped his arms around him. “You kept reading that same card over and over, Danny never changed it. When I saw you at that meeting I couldn’t take it. It had been so long and you still didn’t remember me.”

“That’s why you stormed out, I thought you were an asshole.” Jimmy muttered into Brian’s neck, letting himself be held.

“You’re still going to have to remember why it happened yourself Jimmy, because I don’t know. I wasn’t there and I’m sure your asshole of a brother has been lying to all of us.”

Jimmy rested his hand over Brian’s chest letting his heart beat soothe him.

“Four years, I’ve been in that basement for four years?”


	21. Chapter 21

After they shared a shower, they meet Beverly and Freddie in the living room. They were both glaring at Jimmy and Brian.

“If I ever have to hear you two fucking again I will kill both of you.” Freddie muttered trying to look disgusted but a smile crept on her face. She sat down next to Beverly, they looked on better terms than last night. Beverly still looked distraught she let Freddie hold her hand and Jimmy felt a weight off his shoulders. He couldn’t handle it if everyone was at each other’s throats.

“I’m going to make us all tea.” Brian told them

“Alana’s tea?” Beverly asked hesitantly.

“Yeah, I’ll explain later.” Brian waved off the question Jimmy was about to ask, Jimmy let the words die in his throat. After fucking Brian several times last night and getting head in the shower he was feeling a lot more mellow than usual.

Jimmy watched from the living room as Brian made the tea in the kitchen, it was Jimmy’s favourite room, it had cost them a fortune to renovate the house, and Jimmy had dragged Brian with him to cooking classes, they were not having a beautiful kitchen and still ordering take out. Jimmy smiled at the memory.

Brian carried in a tray of cups filled with the red liquid he handed them all out carefully before taking a seat next to Jimmy. He was aware all eyes were on him, waiting for him to begin explaining. He took a deep breath, trying not to let it get caught in his throat.

“A few days after we met Alana when I got out of the RPU, I decided to go visit her again, I wanted some answers you know. I felt better my body felt different wanted to know what it was we ate. I stayed all day there and she was patient with me, whilst I wrote about a thousand questions on that white board. Alana was a thief but she wasn’t a bad person.” Brian looked at them all Beverly giving him a sad smile. This wasn’t his story to tell but Alana wasn’t here and he wasn’t sure of what the rest knew or how much she had told Beverly.

“She told me all about her life, she married young to a business associate of her father, the marriage also being strictly professional she told me. She didn’t love him. She kept her secrets he kept his. She was scared of him though tried to leave him several times, she wasn’t lying when she told us she was pushed out of a window. She reanimated fairly quickly after that, told me she went feral murdered her husband tore him to pieces…ate him.”

Jimmy took Brian’s hand in his own needing him to know he was here with him as Brian let out a shaky breath. “It was then she realised her pulse came back, thought she had survived the fall but slowly it began to fade away with the lack of nutrients to her body. Once you eat the meat you can’t stop. So that’s how she started digging up graves for organs. She told me the fresher the better.” Brian ran his free hand through his hair.

“So what does that mean for us?” Freddie asked sipping her tea.

“Once you regress you’re essentially alive again you can do everything a lifer can do. Alana said some became stronger and healthier than they were in life. Just depends on the quality of meat. If we don’t get a supply, we’ll start the process of dying all over again and turn feral the craving will take over us. Alana gave me a stock of tea which is nothing more than spices and formaldehyde but we have no meat.” Brian told them sombrely “We have about another week or so before we’ll need some.”

“Did you know this Beverly?” Freddie asked.

“Yes but it made no different to me she never hurt anyone. I loved her.” Her eyes were filled with tears, Freddie wrapped her arm around Beverly’s shoulders.

“I know, I’m sorry.”

“Where are we going to get a fix, they’ll be watching the cemeteries now.” Freddie asked Brian who honestly didn’t know.

“We’ll think of something. For now we’ll stay here come up with a plan, we’ll have the RPU and the HPAB onto us so we need to lay as low as possible for a few days, at least until this thing cools down.” Brian had watched the news report knew it wouldn’t end well, knew he had to find Jimmy but luckily he was already stood at his door. He kissed Jimmy’s forehead, not wanting to let him out of his arms again, knew he couldn’t protect him forever but he would damn well try.

 

Jimmy waited until it was dark to venture outside, he sat in the garden overlooking the lake, watching the sporadic fires in the distance. He focused on the new beat of his heart steady and reassuring. The rise and fall of his chest the cool air prickling his lungs, the way every exhale escaped into the night sky.

“You’ve been out here a while.”

Jimmy hadn’t heard Brian approaching was too deep in thought, he patted the ground beside him and Brian took the hint. He squished himself against Jimmy wrapping them both in a warm blanket.

“Don’t over think things Jim.” Brian placed a kiss on his cheek, warming Jimmy’s face.

“I was trying to piece together a timeline, but some things are still hazy.”

“Don’t force it.” Brian idly ran his fingers through Jimmy’s hair.

“There’s other things I’m confused about too, your sister said she went to my funeral, but Danny told me I woke up—“  


“Yeah I know what Danny told you,” Brian cut him off. “I’ve heard you read that dumb card a few times now. You did have a funeral Jim.” Brian paused thinking it over Jimmy noticed the grief wash over his face. “It was…tough it was a few days after we should have gotten married. If it wasn’t for my sisters dragging me there I wouldn’t have got out of bed. I wore the tux I never got to wear to our wedding.”

Jimmy felt tears fall down his face. “I’m so sorry Brian.”

Brian snapped out of his daze, rubbing his face. “It wasn’t your fault Jimmy.” He drew Jimmy closer had to kiss him, remind himself Jimmy was here with him again. He didn’t like to talk about it, or remember the aftermath of life without Jimmy.

“You weren’t in the coffin Jim.” Brian said when he broke the kiss. “Danny fucking lied, I thought you were in that ground for three years but he just vanished taking you with him.”

“What?” Jimmy startled.

“I still remember the phone call from him, you had been in a car crash that you had ploughed down a cliff and they never found your car.”  


Jimmy’s eyes went wide his breath hitching in his throat. “That’s not what he told me.”

“I know Jimmy, I don’t know what happened to you that night.” Brian sounded desperate almost pleading Jimmy to remember and tell him, he had been waiting so many years.

“He arranged the funeral he did everything I was a complete fucking mess I couldn’t do anything. He came to see me before he left I lost it jumped at him wrapped my hands so tight around his neck until my sister came in screaming.”

Jimmy tried not to be pleasantly pleased but fuck if Danny didn’t deserve it, he had no clue what his brother had done.

“He only came back when news had reached him I was dead.” Brian stopped to let out a rattled exhale, looking at Jimmy defeated.  “I’m sorry Jimmy I tried so hard I tried really fucking hard to move on. Over the years the more I thought about that night about everything that had been taken from me. It was a parasite eating away at me until I couldn’t take it anymore.” Brian confessed.

Jimmy’s world started crashing down around him. Brian held Jimmy’s face in his hands to get his attention. “I came back six hours later, Carli was there sobbing and shouting every name under the sun at me.” Brian tried to smile but it was too strained.

“You know I would never want that for you Brian, you should have moved on found someone else.”

“I just couldn’t.” Brian’s rasped out, dropping his hands. “You weren’t there anymore Jim.”

Jimmy couldn’t focus on what was being said couldn’t believe Brian would throw his life away over him.

“When I heard your brother had moved back into your parents’ old home I had to go see him. I wanted to scare the shit out of him. But then I got there and you were sat on the front porch and you looked at me as if I was nobody. I couldn’t get a word out before Danny was there shoving you into the house the RPU turning up out of nowhere dragging me away.”

Jimmy just kept shaking his head, didn’t want to hear him it was ripping him apart. How much Brian had been through and all that time he never knew he existed.

“I don’t regret it.” Brian told him sincerely. “I found you again.” He kissed away the tears on Jimmy’s face until he rested his head on Jimmy’s shoulder. Jimmy closed his eyes letting the warmth of Brian take away the pain that was threatening to consume him, prise them apart again. They let the silence surround them, their beating hearts comforting the other.

 

“There still starting fires.” Jimmy said after a while.

“It’s all over the TV there’s no laws against killing the reanimated the police are just warming their hands.”

“Are we just waiting to burn?”

Brian watched the flames dance up into the sky. “I’ll kill them myself before I let that happen.”  


“We either burn or rot, take your pick.”

“I already lost you once before, you think I’m going to let that happen again, it’s us against them Jimmy. We’re not human anymore we’re not safe, we don’t owe lifers anything. If we have to steal or kill to survive then so be it.”

The words sent a shiver down Jimmy’s spine, he had a heard a similar threat posed by Brian before in his basement. Only now he understood it. A smile crept along his face, turning to look at Brian whose heated gaze reflected his own.

“Us against them.” Jimmy repeated liking the way it rolled off his tongue. 

“Jimmy!” They both turned quickly to see where the shrill shout had come from, Freddie was running over to them a look of horror on her face.

“Jimmy, you need to come now. There’s something wrong with Beverly.” Jimmy was already moving to his feet, Brian reaching out to calm Freddie. “She found this…this picture it had fallen out of Jimmy’s pocket and then she started screaming.” She was breathless trying to steady herself. “It’s like she’s regressing again.”


	22. Chapter 22

“Bev?” Jimmy asked hesitantly he sat down slowly beside her, she was holding the newspaper clipping that had been sat in his pocket for a few weeks. Until now he had completely forgotten about it. Beverly’s hands were shaking and her breathing was laboured, tears fell down her face her gaze unfocused, Jimmy’s words not reaching her.

Jimmy looked to Freddie for an explanation, she gave him a helpless shrug.

“Beverly, do you know them?” More tears fell down her face as she hung her head down the picture still gripped tightly in her hands. He stroked her arm in a soothing manner as he studied the same picture she was holding, his therapist and his partner smiling to the camera holding the award Chilton had won. “Focus on your breathing Bev, I’m right here if you need me okay?” Jimmy offered, trying to get a response from her but she remained catatonic. 

Brian and Freddie busied themselves in the kitchen boiling tea and whispering to each other, Jimmy couldn’t make out what they were saying but Freddie sounded like she was disagreeing with whatever Brian was muttering.

“That guy there,” Jimmy pointed to the picture knowing Beverly wasn’t looking at it anymore her eyes staring out at nothing. “He’s my therapist Frederick Chilton. Total prick.” Jimmy commented “I wouldn’t say psychiatry is his forte, and that guy he’s with some boyfriend of his, they’re both cheating on each other.”

Beverly lifted her head to look at Jimmy. “That guy…” Her voice was soft and broken Jimmy leaned in closer to hear her, letting her take his hand. “He did it.”

“Did what?” Jimmy asked puzzled his brows creased looking at the picture again.

“This.”

It took him a moment to understand what she meant and then his blood started to boil.

“Are you sure?” She nodded shakily at him, tears slipping down her cheeks. Jimmy read the caption underneath the photo again. “Will Graham.” The name tasted bitter on Jimmy’s lips.

“I didn’t know him,” She squeezed Jimmy’s hand trying to not let the wave of nausea hit her. “I kept seeing flashes of that night, could never make out his face. It’s him Jimmy he murdered me.”

Jimmy pulled her into a hug letting her cry into his shoulder, the sound of her broken cries pulling him away from his own panic attack. The rage was building through his body, could feel his veins warm with anger the thrill creating nervous tension wanting to escape him and he knew who his target would be.

“I’ll kill him.”

Beverly pulled back from the hug to stare at Jimmy letting her mouth fall open.

“Are you—“

“I’m serious.”

“Jimmy you can’t.”

“He took your life from you Beverly, he dragged you into a forest and hacked you to pieces.” He saw her flinch at his words, but she needed to hear it. “He’ll never be brought to justice for what he did, who knows how many other people he has done this to.”

“Are you crazy?” Freddie jumped out of nowhere, making it known that herself and Brian had been listening to Jimmy’s conversation with Beverly. “You can’t go around killing people, two wrongs don’t make a right.”

“You wouldn’t kill the guy who set your house on fire?”

“I…no.” Freddie shook her head, perplexed by Jimmy’s tone. “It wouldn’t change anything.”

“When I find the person responsible for Jimmy’s death I’ll take my sweet time slicing their throat open.” Brian gave a satisfied smile and Jimmy startled beside him before the words oddly reassured him.

 

“Could I kill him?” Beverly asked quietly.

“Beverly are you serious right now? This isn’t you.”

“No, he took that from me. He deserves the same.” Beverly said bitterly. “I want his arm.”

Jimmy nodded. “An arm for an arm right.” Brian smirked beside him and Freddie looked at them all horrified.

“Have you all gone fucking crazy?” Freddie threw her hands up in the air, her voice stretched thin.

“They killed Alana too, if they find us here they’ll kill us all without a second thought.”

Freddie shook her head refusing to believe anything Beverly was telling her.

“Look Freddie the situation is this, we need meat. We can’t just go rob cemeteries or hospitals the lifers are everywhere right now. So we take it from the people that took from us. They owe us.” Brian told her, Freddie shook her head at him pacing the living room.

“No fuck you guys, I’m not a murderer. I will not have this on my conscience.”

“You’ll change your mind when you need feeding.” Brian warned. “You won’t last long without it.

“I’d rather rot than become a monster.” Freddie sneered at them before storming to the door.

“Freddie wait, where are you going?” Beverly stopped her.

“I’d rather take my chances with the lifers.” She slammed the door shut behind her making the others jump. Silence circled them, letting Freddie’s voice die out and leave them behind.

“We need a plan.” Jimmy said finally, looking at the only people he could trust now. They both nodded at him and for once Jimmy felt like he was in control.

 

They sat and planned the best options available to them, ensuring they had back up plans and escape routes. They worked until Beverly fell asleep, Jimmy placed a blanket over her on the couch. He was watching Brian asleep in bed next to him, occasionally reaching out to stroke his face, his fingers not able to help themselves. He wasn’t sure if they were doing the right thing, do friends normally sit and plan a murder together. Not particularly but the more the plan came together the more he realised they could get away with it. Get a supply of meat for a time being and give Beverly closure.

“Stop staring.” Brian mumbled his eyes still closed but a grin spreading across his face.

“I can’t help it.”

“Go to sleep.” Brian pulled him closer wrapping an arm around his waist.

“Do you think we should go through with this?”

“We do what we have to, to survive.” Brian placed a kiss on Jimmy’s head. Jimmy wasn’t sure but his gums were starting to ache and the craving for meat was beginning its ascent within him.

“I love you.” Brian told him sleepily and Jimmy could do this, had to go through with this for Brian and Beverly. “I love you too B.”


	23. Chapter 23

 The music swarmed him as soon as he entered the club, Nightshade, the one Jimmy remembered Chilton talking about on the phone. The bass pounded away at his skull, he steeled his face hard not to let his discomfort show. Before they left they had studied themselves in the mirror, they looked perfectly healthy. Jimmy questioned whether he looked younger, his skin fresher and less wrinkles marring his face. They could do this.

They were here for one reason only. He held tightly to the hand that was leading him through the throng of half-naked bodies gyrating against each other in beat with the music. The craving intensified being so close to fresh meat, his gums carving away at his mouth. Brian turned to him and gestured with his head to where their victim was standing. He had his head thrown back in laughter, a hand resting on a blonde’s arm. Brian gave Jimmy a grin and led them closer to their prey.

Brian began dancing, his leather jacket opening to reveal his bare chest, others stopping to watch him closely, Brian ignored them pulling Jimmy closer and wrapping his arms around his neck grinding against his body as Jimmy followed his movements, once they were aware of the crowd watching their lewd movements, Brian lifted his head to stare at Will letting his blue gaze burn away at him, getting an equally sordid stare back. Brian made a come hither motion with his finger as Will recklessly followed. This was a finely tuned game, and they were not going to lose.

Will weaselled his way in between the two of them, Jimmy let out a huff of breath that he masked as a groan as their victim grinded between himself and Brian. He wanted to reach out and strangle him, hated being anywhere near him. He watched as Will ran his hands through Brian’s hand and Jimmy had to fight the wave of jealous hitting him to the floor. He knew this was the plan, had to let it wash over him. Will ran a hand down Jimmy’s face and Jimmy wanted to fight him off but pushed himself to dance with Will.

“You two are new here?” Will asked them above the music, pulling them both closer couldn’t get enough of their body heat. They could smell the alcohol on Will already, Brian nodded at him giving him a slick smile. “I’m Will.” He told them both oblivious to the hatred they both harboured for him.

“We’re going to have such a fun time with you Will.” Brian’s words dripped like honey and Will was practically drooling for him. They danced with Will pulling at them both, Jimmy fought hard to not punch him to the floor when he stole kisses from Brian running his hands down Brian’s bare chest. The air around him was dense and there were circled with bodies dancing and jumping around them. Jimmy kept closing his eyes to calm himself, the nerves thrumming along his skin, could smell Will was placing bites along his neck before he realised what he was doing. Will didn’t mind was lost to the sensation as he leaned his head back on Jimmy’s chest. Jimmy looked up at Brian who was grinning at him his eyes dazed.

“Will,” Brian cooed at him, getting him to focus his eyes on Brian. “You want to come with us?” Will didn’t need asking twice he swallowed thickly and nodded his head. Brian held out the same hand that had led Jimmy into the club for Will to take. Jimmy followed after them, could already taste Will on his lips and couldn’t wait to get a proper bite.

Jimmy drove the car back to the house, Will in the back whispering to Brian who kept snickering at his words, licking his lips and flirting back. Jimmy adverted his gaze when Will pulled him closer to press open mouth kisses to his face. He wanted to break Will so bad into a thousand pieces. He gripped the steering wheel harder they were careful to avoid walking past any security cameras they didn’t want to be traced back to Will Graham. As far as anyone knew they had no connection and they wanted it to stay that way.

When Jimmy braked the car hard sending Will face first into the back of his seat. He hid his laugh as Will rubbed at his head. Brian lead them both to the house, the whole ride there he had kept watch if anyone was following them or If anyone noticed Will leaving with them, they hadn’t. Jimmy watched as Brian and Will walked into the unlit house before locking the front door shut again. Will was muttering away to himself about how he normally doesn’t do this kind of thing into Brian’s ear as Jimmy rolled his eyes.

“It’s the first time for us too.” Brian gave him a crooked smile and a wink at Jimmy. Brian pinned Will against the wall running his gaze over his body, Will let out a breathy laugh that turned Jimmy’s stomach. Will gave Brian a lazy grin, lavishing the attention placed solely on him, Jimmy rolled his eyes he was done with this now he wanted to eat.

“There’s someone we’d like you to meet first.” Jimmy told him, trying to keep his tone flirty. Brian stepped back from Will slightly letting him get a clearer view of the footsteps approaching them. They watched as several emotions danced over Will’s face until all the colour ran from him. Will panicked as he tried to step back to the door, looked for an escape route, tried to run past Brian who grabbed him. “Mr Graham,” Beverly walked over to them her hand held behind her back. “Do you remember me?”

“What is this? What’s going on?”

Brian grabbed Will roughly by the arm. “Answer the question.”

“I…uh…yeah.” Will breathed out harshly, he couldn’t look at her. “Please, please don’t.” He begged, trying to escape out of Brian’s grip.

“Did my pleas for help stop you?” She asked him her eyes narrowing in on him, distain dripping from her words.

“I didn’t know you would reanimate.” He snapped, his eyes blinking rapidly at her, as if she would disappear at any second.

“Why did you do it?”

“It’s art.” He told her, as if that was a good enough reason. “To go with my collection.”

Beverly brought her arm around to the front of her chest holding a knife.

“We’re going to have fun tonight Will, but first I need your arm.” She gave him a sickeningly sweet smile. He didn’t have time to react before Jimmy and Brian had pinned him to the floor.


	24. Chapter 24

Jimmy still had Will’s brains in his teeth as he bagged the fresh meat placing it in the freezer, there was a lot but they had more freezers in the garage. His whole body buzzed, felt intoxicated. The fresh meat was luxury and Jimmy kept running his tongue along his lips they did not wait too long before they cracked the skull open and dug in, the craving taken over them.

Beverly was dancing around with Will’s arm, giddy from the high of the meat, Jimmy kept smiling at her. He thought he would feel more guilt as soon as they pulled away from the body, after the last chunk had been swallowed, and yet all he felt was warmth allowing the calmness to take over him. The aftertaste of brains soothing his throat. They had a good supply for a while and took out an apparent serial killer, Jimmy didn’t feel too bad about it.

He felt arms circle his waist as Brian laid his head on Jimmy’s shoulder.

“You okay?”

Jimmy placed a kiss on his cheek and nodded. “You get rid of the rest?” Brian nodded this time, he pulled back and motioned for Jimmy to follow him to the living room. Jimmy watched as Brian walked over to the record player, placing the needle on the vinyl. He turned and held out the same hand to Jimmy giving him a coy grin. “May I have this dance?”

Jimmy nodded, ignoring the bloodied floors that still needed cleaning, he took Brian’s hand and fell into his embrace, swaying slowly to the music. No grinding and thumping bass screaming in his ears, just the two of them together.

“You okay?” Brian asked again, Beverly was dancing around them the arm flung over her shoulder.

“Never felt better.” Jimmy muffled into Brian’s shoulder.

 _“My love is a life taker.”_ Both Brian and Beverly sang together with the music grinning stupidly. Jimmy let them dance together, rolling his eyes at them laughing. When the song slowed again, Brian took Jimmy’s hand and leaned him back placing a sweet kiss on his lips. Beverly clapped her hand with Will’s hand when the song finished.

_Jimmy couldn’t sleep as he laid awake watching his fiancé sleep he had told Jimmy an hour ago to just go to sleep already but Jimmy was too excited, they were getting married in the morning. He was going over his to do list in his head, had he remembered everything? Would the flowers arrive on time? The buzzing beside him pulled him away from his thoughts he knew only one person called him at two in the morning. Giving an aggravated sigh he snatched his phone._

_“What now?”_

_“Ji…Jimmmerooooo,” Danny slurred down the phone, “I need yooooooooou, come pick hey get the fuck off me….” Jimmy let Danny argue with whoever was near him as he walked out of the bedroom closing the door, he did not want to wake Brian up with his asshole of a brother. “Jimmers, buddy, champ of mine pick me up.”_

_“Call a cab.”_

_“Money, money, moneeeyyyy,” Danny sang down the phone “Got none.”_

_Jimmy ran a hand through his hair letting out a calming exhale before speaking again. “Where are you at?”_

_Danny was at the aptly named bar The Horse You Came In On, Jimmy was pist at the hour drive it took to get here, he should be in bed with his fiancé not fetching his drunk ass brother home. Jimmy saw him slouched across the bar trying to run his hand up some sixty year old woman’s skirt she slapped his hand away giggling and Jimmy questioned how the fuck they were even related._

_“Danny, come on.”_

_“Heyyy youuu.” Danny grinned, whiskey dribbling down his chin. “It’s you, it’s youuuu, look how handddsome my brother is.” Danny threw his head back in laughter._

_“Okay, you’ve hand entirely way too much.” Jimmy helped his brother off the stool, he wanted the hell out of the place, the alcohol was making him spin he still fought hard every day not to drink a drop of the stuff and this wasn’t helping._

_“I’m coming, I’m ah-coming I can walllllllk myself.” Danny huffed snatching his arm back, and tripping over a table leg landing face first. Jimmy sighed irritably helping his brother up again and walking him out of the bar._

_“Drink this.” Jimmy handed him the coffee in the car, Danny turned his nose up at it before taking it, letting the travel mug warm his cold fingers._

_They drove in silence for a while, they were the only car on the road Jimmy needed Danny to sober up even the smallest amount before he could attempt to talk to him, he kept risking glances at his brother to ensure he was drinking the coffee._

_“You know we should hang out more.” Danny blinked lazily his words still slurred._

_“This is the last time I do this Danny, I’m not picking your ass up from another bar.”_

_“Yeah, yeah.” Danny shrugged him off loudly, his eyes rolling hugely at Jimmy, who wanted to shove his brother out of the car._

_“No, this is the last fucking time you need to get help Danny. You can’t keep dragging me down with you.”_

_Danny sneered at him “Well sorrrrrrry, I didn’t ask to be your twin.”_

_Jimmy gripped the steering wheel harder it was like arguing with a fifty four year old drunken child._

_“Did you dump that guy yet?” Danny asked sloppily trying to grin at his brother but his face squished up into itself. “He is not a fan of ol’ Danny is he?” Danny laughed slapping his hand on his knee._

_“Do you have any fans Danny?” Jimmy decided to humour him._

_“You, you big lug.” Danny took a swing at his arm too hard and Jimmy flinch as the punch landed. Jimmy_

_“We’re brothers Danny that’s it.”_

_Danny slouched in his seat hurt. “It’s because of him isn’t it? He turned you against me.” Jimmy let his brother talk to himself, he had heard this all before. Jimmy knew it was pure jealously that Jimmy was happy for once, wasn’t the one lying in the gutter clinging a bottle of whatever he could get his hands on. He had a career and was getting married to the man he loved and Danny had hit the self-destruct button._

_“Leave Brian out of this, just for once.” Jimmy pleaded._

_Danny grimaced, “You’ll come running when he leaves you for some pretty blonde chick.”_

_“For fuck sake Danny, it’s half three in the morning I’m not getting into this.” Once the words would have bothered him, but Jimmy had been with Brian for nine years and had never cheated on him, so Jimmy let his drunken mess of a brother carry on talking to himself, throwing insults left right and centre, by the time he pulled up to Danny’s house he wanted to scream._

_He helped his brother out of the car and into the house, turning on lights so Danny could see what he was doing. Jimmy hated the house it was more a mansion than a simple abode, the palace of Versailles has less gold in it. In the kitchen he started making two cups of coffee, it was now four and the appeal of sleep was leaving him, Danny had irritated every nerve in his body._

_“Thanks.” Danny said sitting down at the table grabbing his freshly made coffee. “I’m sorry Jimmy.” He mumbled, Jimmy fought hard not to roll his eyes, Danny went in stages with his alcoholic moods, usually happy drunk then emotional then hurtful following by self-pity and apologises, a round of short burst anger followed by sobbing until he passed out. Jimmy wanted this over and done with._

_“Have you looked into AA meetings?”_

_“That’s for weak people, I can quit drinking anytime.”_

_“Then do it, and stop calling me at all hours of the night.” Jimmy threw back a hurt look. He still attended his AA meetings they saved his life and not once did he feel weak for doing so._

_“I’m a fuck-up that’s who I am.” Danny smiled sadly “You’re the brother that got the good grades and everyone was proud of and I’m the one who got a pity job from Dad because he didn’t think anyone would hire me.” Danny fumed, his coffee sloshing over his hands._

_“You never take responsibility for yourself, you just fucking coast along dragging everyone down with you. Man the fuck up.” Jimmy wasn’t shouting he kept his tone steady was going for an honesty tactic but could see his brother scowling at him._

_“I’ll never be as good as you, always in your shadow.” Danny drank his black coffee, watching Jimmy bit the inside of his cheek._

_“Are you done?” Jimmy patronised him, every word falling from Danny was utter shit and they both knew it. Danny was by far the superior brother to their parents, his father had left his company to Danny and not a cent to Jimmy. His mother rarely spoke to him after he graduated high school so Danny’s self-pity tirade was receiving no sympathy from Jimmy._

_Danny puffed out lips in thought blowing them out in a grating noise. “Help me up the stairs.” Danny mumbled avoiding his brother’s gaze. Jimmy let his chair scrap across the floor making Danny glare at. He put the cups in the sink, and grabbed Danny’s arm to help him up the floor of stairs to his room. The house was worth millions, Danny had sucked the company dry trying to pay for the thing. Now the rest of the profits were draining steadily away to Danny’s drinking habit._

_Danny stopped at the stop of the stairs, ignoring Jimmy pulling on his arm to get him to his room, the sooner he could leave the better._

_“Why didn’t you invite me to the wedding?”_

_Jimmy froze, the arm he was holding slipped from his grasp. “How did you find out?”_

_“Ran into that hot blonde you work with.”_

_“Stephanie.” Jimmy told him, he rubbed at his head he knew she wasn’t good at keeping secrets._

_“Are you really that embarrassed of me?”_

_Jimmy looked Danny up and down before staring at his face, he looked years older than Jimmy._

_“Look at yourself Danny, do I really want this at my wedding? You throwing insults and trying to fight Brian?” He remembered that time they had invited Danny to Christmas and that was the worst mistake ever._

_“I’m your brother, I should be there.”_

_Jimmy shook his head at him. “Danny this is a fresh start for me, I get to spend the rest of my life with Brian and I don’t need you in it.” Danny’s face fell hurt._

_“You’re so fucking naïve Jimmy if you think he loves you.”_

_“I’ve put up with your shit for the last time, you’re poison Danny.” Jimmy pointed sharply at Danny, who started to draw nearer to Jimmy. “Your wife left you, your kids hate your guts.” Danny squeezed his hands into fists, crowding into Jimmy making him walk backwards, but not backing down. “The only reason I’m here right now is because I promised Mom I would look out for you, even she knew how much of a fuck up you were.” Danny saw red and instinctively pushed his hands out in front of him, Jimmy tried to scramble for leverage but his hands clawed at the air as he fell and kept falling hitting every step, every smack on bone hitting the marble staircase, he fell until blackness overcame him._

Jimmy woke with a jolt his chest heaving as a wave of nausea hit him, he ran to the bathroom to throw him. He tried to calm his breathing as wave after wave kept hitting him. Tears blurred his eyes as he felt a familiar pair of arms wrap around his body.

“Jimmy?” Brian held Jimmy’s face gently in his hands, his worried look making Jimmy fell guilty. He sat with him clinging to him until his breathing returned to normal. He kept replaying the dream over and over in his head. “Honey?”

“I’m fine,” Jimmy gave him a weak smile. “Just a bad dream.” He shook his head brushing It off.

“Is this about last night?” Jimmy shook his head again, giving Brian a reassuring smile.

“It was nothing, really I’m fine.” Brian let his brows crease in worry, before Jimmy pulled him into a hug. “Honestly B, quit worrying.” If he told Brian what happened that night he knew what the outcome would be.


	25. Chapter 25

Jimmy was watching the news on TV, watching footage of the lifers throwing riots in the street and carrying on with their mass burnings.

“Do I look younger?” Beverly asked, she was touching her face studying her reflection in the mirror. “I look like I’m in my twenties again.” She turned to them and Brian gave her a smile from the kitchen.

“You both look younger too.” She said surprised, looking at them closely, Jimmy just shrugged anything was possible these days.

“Do you think it’s the meat?”

“I try not to ask questions we’ll never get the answers to.” Brian told her trying to scramble the eggs. Once the panic attack had ebbed away from Jimmy’s system the three of them realised how hungry they were and not for meat, that was pure craving, a drug almost. No they actually wanted real food. They kept cash in the house so Brian left to grab as much food as possible, reluctantly leaving Jimmy and Beverly. No one gave him a second look at the grocery store, he paid for his things and left.

Jimmy was still sat on the sofa looking shell shocked when he returned he had no idea what was wrong with him but Jimmy had reassured him several times it had nothing to do with Will Graham, Brian hoped he wasn’t lying to him.

“Okay foods up.” Brian smiled, looking pleased with himself he hadn’t cooked a meal for so long he was surprised he still remembered how to do it. He brought the plates to the living room handing them over to Beverly and Jimmy, before grabbing his own and sitting down beside Jimmy, who was just poking at his food.

“My husband,” The woman sobbed on TV the microphone shoved under her nose. “Never hurt anyone, he was a good man, he served this country well as chief of police.”

It was then that Jimmy looked up, he knew that voice.

“The Crawford’s home was set on fire between the hours of two and four am last night, Mrs Crawford was saved by her neighbours, her reanimated husband has been confirmed dead by the RPU.”

Jimmy watched as Bella sobbed, someone helping her walk away from the camera.

“They killed Jack.” Beverly’s voice broke. “How could they do that?” They watched the TV as hordes of people with torches and fire bombs all marched through the street on the previous night, cheering and chanting as they found brainers to drag out of the house and set aflame. Jimmy turned the TV off.

“I’m going to lie down for a while.” He thought the TV would distract him from his thoughts but it just reminded him of what a vicious circle he was now stuck in. They were hunters and the hunted they needed to stay ahead of the game.

“Jim?”

“I just need to be alone.” Jimmy offered him a smile but Brian didn’t return it, just look at him concerned.

 

Jimmy debated whether or not to go lie back down in bed, but the thought made him feel sick the dream still kicking around in his mind. He wrapped a thick blanket over himself and sat in the garden, focusing on the view that went on for miles. He knew Danny would be looking for him, and wondered why he hadn’t showed up at the house already as he so often did. Couldn’t believe his brother had kept him as some sort of household pet for the past four years, letting him wallow allow in various basements. His memory of what happened the past four years still evaded him and Jimmy wasn’t sure he wanted to know what he had been put through, what bullshit his brother had told him on a day to day basis and Jimmy had just accepted. He let the autumn wind keep him company for an hour, before Beverly sat down beside him, he offered her the blanket to wrap up in.

“Aren’t you freezing out here by now?” She studied the view, watching the cows graze the far off fields.

“It’s fine.”

“Are you fine?” Beverly looked at him, watching for the expression to change on Jimmy’s face but he kept his face blank.

“Yes, really.”

“I’m not going to lie Brian is freaking out inside the house.” 

“I’ll go talk to him in a while.” Jimmy promised her, Beverly gave him a grateful smile.

“How you feeling about all of this?”

“I keep waiting for the guilt to set in,” Beverly shrugged slowly, “I feel relieved.”

Jimmy felt the sense of relief too last night, now he felt a mix of emotions all bubbling away at him, making him wanting to run or hide he wasn’t sure which.

“I know that isn’t what’s bothering you Jim, what’s wrong?”

Beverly turned her face to watch Jimmy. “I had a dream last night, I remembered what happened.” Jimmy clung to the blanket a little tighter.

“My brother Danny,” Jimmy furrowed his brows the dream still on a loop playing away. “He uh, I didn’t die in a car accident, he murdered me.”

Beverly’s mouth hung slack, her eyes growing wide. “What, how?”

“We had a fight in his house, he was drunk again. It was my fault though Bev, I pushed him too far he was being a bastard and I couldn’t keep handle it so I snapped at him. I don’t think he meant to do it Bev.”

Beverly shook her head beside him. “He still did it though Jimmy, you’re making excuses for him, he ruined both yours and Brian’s life.”

“Well he got wanted he wanted in the end.” Jimmy exhaled. “Hated the thought of me ever being happy.”

“You need to tell Brian.”

“I know,” Jimmy said sadly, “He’s wanted to know what happened for the past four years, I’m worried what he’ll do.”

Beverly nodded her understanding. “He deserves to hear it, he needs closure too you know Jimmy.”

Beverly wrapped her arm around Jimmy bringing him closer into a hug.

“I’m sorry.” She told him sincerely, pressing a kiss to his head.  She stood up letting the blanket fall, holding out a hand. “Come on, Brian’s been making pasta to take his mind off things and last time I looked he was making enough to feed a small village.” Jimmy laughed grabbing her hand to pull himself up.

When they got to the kitchen, the pots were bubbling away to themselves, Beverly dashed to turn them all off.

“Brian?” Jimmy called out, but he got no answer, he checked the other rooms and he was nowhere to be seen. He felt a twist of nerves build in his chest as he returned back to the kitchen to see Beverly reading a note.

“He’s gone to Danny’s.”


	26. Chapter 26

Jimmy saw the car which they had been using was gone, he was already running ignoring Beverly’s shouts telling him to stop. He just had to keep moving, wasn’t sure If he was running in the right direction or not until the route came back to him, the memory of driving to and from this place to work, which was close to his old parent’s house.

Beverly caught up to him running alongside him, he knew they weren’t running at a normal speed typical of lifers, but he wasn’t slowing down, he avoided the obvious routes lest people see them and chase after them. They kept running, sprinting through the forest dodging fallen logs and avoiding the occasional confused deer. When they hit the streets, saw the familiar neighbourhoods, they eased their pace, Jimmy was amazed his lungs weren’t burning and his body about to drop but he didn’t even feel out of breath.

He motioned with his head for Beverly to follow him, pleased she had come with him he wasn’t sure what he would find at the house. They both halted once they were stood in front of the porch, the door was shut and the lights were off. Jimmy noticed they key Danny hid under the porch mat was stuck in the door, Jimmy exhaled sharply and opened the door. He felt Beverly following after him, as he switched on the lights, he entered the living room to see Brian sitting there waiting, he looked disappointed when he realised it wasn’t Danny.

“Brian, what are you doing?”

“Waiting for your brother.” Brian said matter-of-factly.

“We need to get out of here, before anyone sees us.” Beverly told them both “I’ll give you five minutes but we need to go.” Beverly looked at them both before leaving the room.

Jimmy stood watching Brian, could see the large kitchen knife resting on the coffee table beside him. He cautiously walked over and sat down beside him.

“I can’t believe...That lying fuck!” Brian stood up faster than Jimmy could blink watching as the table was sent flying across the room.

“Brian.” Jimmy grabbed him, forcing him to look him in the eyes. “Please.” Brian hung his shoulders defeated. Jimmy drew closer and gathered Brian in his arms, running his hands through his hair. “I was going to tell you, but you’d already gone.” Jimmy kissed him on the cheek.

“If I see him I’ll kill him.” Brian looked down at Jimmy, who nodded his head.

“It’s my fault it happened though, if I hadn’t of picked him up from that bar or let him get to me he wouldn’t have done it.”

“It’s not your fault.” Brian tipped Jimmy’s chin up and pressed his lips to his, needing to be closer to him. “I knew, I fucking knew he did it. He couldn’t even look me in the eye, he disappeared for three years to avoid me. I can’t believe he did that to you and then kept you like a fucking prize.” Brian let the tears fall down his face. “That I didn’t do anything to save you.”

Jimmy felt the tears spring to his eyes, buried his head in Brian’s chest. “Do it.” Jimmy said looking up wiping his face. “Just don’t eat him.” Jimmy grimaced. All day he felt he should be protecting his brother, trying to convince himself it was an accident but Danny had hated his guts from being kids. Never wanted Jimmy to have any friends, every boyfriend he had was driven away by his brother, any amount of success was trampled on until it drove him to drinking. When Danny fucked up the company, he needed an outlet to throw all his anger into and it was aimed solely at Jimmy.

He let the warmth of Brian’s arms steady his nerves, resting his head on his chest, they heard the gunshot from the kitchen, both looked at each other before running to the kitchen at the sound of the next shot being fired.

They both stopped at the door, their mouths hanging open, Jimmy shifted his feet as the blood started pooling closer to them.

“Beverly?”

“I…he just came at me.” She barely said above a whisper, she lowered the gun down. “Tried to reach his gun but I got to it first.” Jimmy knelt to the floor above his brother, still twitching away. Brian kicked at Danny’s body.

“Guess you won again, fucker.” Brian muttered stepping over the body to help Beverly out of the kitchen. Jimmy could hear Brian talking to Beverly in the living about how he was supposed to kill Danny.

Jimmy sat down next to his brother taking his hand, Danny turned his head slowly to look at him. “Ji..m?”

“I found out what you did, there was no car crash at all?” He watched as Danny turned to look away, coughing up blood, the wound in his stomach seeping blood turning his white collared shirt into a red patchwork. “That night when you pushed me down the stairs, was it an accident?” Danny’s eyes were blinking away slowly he tried a few times to speak, making Jimmy lean in closer.

“No,” He coughed out “I should have killed you when you reanimated.” Jimmy didn’t get another word out before Brian swarmed in throwing himself onto of Danny, as he began smashing Danny’s head into the tiled flooring over and over, Jimmy sat transfixed as his brother’s face turned to pulp, watching the tears run down Brian’s face as his screams covered the bone hitting crunch of the skull smashing to the floor. The blood covered the kitchen walls, until there was nothing left for Brian to cling to.

“Thanks.” Jimmy told him, Brian exhaled a few shaky breaths looking at his work, he slowly stood up wiping his face smearing it with blood.

“Any time.” He stood and kicked Danny’s body again. He helped Jimmy up from the ground letting his bloodied hands rest on his chest. Jimmy pressed a chaste kiss to Brian’s lips could taste the cooper tang of his brother’s blood. Brian grinned into the kiss, running his tongue along Jimmy’s bottom lip, Jimmy delved his tongue into Brian’s mouth their movements frantic as Jimmy wanted to touch every part of Brian, wrapping his leg around him until Brian took the hint lifting him up by the ass to sit him on the counter, still smirking into their kisses.

“Well as much as I’d like you two to fuck over the corpse of your dead brother we need to get the hell out of here.” Beverly leaned against the door giving them both a shit eating grin, in her hand was a can of gasoline. She looked down at Danny’s now decapitated head mushed into the floor, she didn’t look at it again.


	27. Chapter 27

Jimmy stood watching the house burn for as long as he could there was something comforting about the flames consuming the house, leaving behind that life, he was reanimated now it was time to start again. They had to leave when a crowd started to gather around the house, their chorus of cheers echoing through the street as Brian drove them away from the neighbourhood.

Jimmy only looked out the window when Brian stopped the car, they weren’t at the house but he recognised the building.

“I’ll be five minutes.” He said as he grabbed the keys, Jimmy gave him a quick once over, his shirt soaked with his brothers blood, his hands stained a crimson red.

“I’m coming with you.”

“Me too.” Beverly said from the back of the car, they followed after him. Brian didn’t stop to knock but his presence didn’t go unnoticed his sister was sitting in the kitchen. She let out a shrill scream stopping them all in place.

“Fuck!” Brian jumped “Was there any need for that?”

“You scared the shit out,” Amy stood up to point at her brother, she reeled back shaking slightly. “What happened, why are you covered in blood? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, it’s not my blood.”

“That doesn’t make it any better.”

“Amy, I don’t have time for this, I’m fine.” Brian kissed her on the head, trying not to touch her with his hands. “I just need to get my stuff.”

“What is going on?” She looked at them puzzled. “Who are you?”

“I’m Beverly Katz.” She held out her hand for Amy to shake who timidly shook it, a blush creeping on her face.

“Hi, I’m Amy.”

“Sorry for intruding.”

“No it’s fine,” She brushed the comment off with a shake of her hand. “Who is this guy?”

Brian was dragging empty duffle bags from under the sink and turned to see who Amy was pointing at.

“It’s Jimmy.” Brian said like it was obvious. Amy narrowed her eyes at him shaking her head laughing slightly.

“Why do you look so much younger?”

Jimmy shrugged at her, couldn’t tell her the real reason. “New wrinkle cream.” He offered.

Brian bit the smile on the face, throwing the bags over his face.

“I’ll be a few minutes.” He ran out of the room up the stairs.

“I’m so confused.” Amy sank down onto the chair. “Are you…are you still brainers?”

Jimmy scratched his head. “Uh…”

“We try not to worry about these things.” Beverly interrupted.

Amy shook her head again. “They said on the news...” Amy trailed off not wanting to say it out loud.

“One day I’ll explain all this to you.” Jimmy gave her a comforting smile. “You can’t tell anyone we were here though.”

Amy shook her head at Jimmy’s words. “I won’t, are you guys safe?” She watched the look shared between Jimmy and Beverly, unsure it didn’t rest easy with her. Brian kept walking past them struggling to carry duffle bag after duffle bag back to the car, Jimmy kept an eye on him as Beverly talked to Amy.

“Okay, time to go.” Brian told them once he had packed the last bag and shut the boot.

“Where are you going?”

“We’re not sure yet, I’ll call you ok.” Brian told his sister who just give him an exasperated sigh. “I love you okay, tell Carli and Rosie I’m fine.” Brian pulled her into a hug, still careful of his hands staining her clothes. She gave him a teary nod she waved bye to Beverly as she followed after Brian.

“Look after him okay.” Amy caught Jimmy’s sleeve to make him stop. Jimmy pulled her into a hug.

“I promise.”

 

The drive back to the house was quiet, Jimmy held Brian’s hand the entire time and Beverly asked Brian a dozen questions about his younger sister.

“You’re not dating my sister Beverly.”

She cackled from the back seat, “We’ll see.” She teased him.

“What’s in the bag?” Jimmy asked

“Three hundred thousand dollars.”

Jimmy choked on thin air his eyes nearly falling out of his face. “I’m sorry, what?”

“You never wrote a will so legally the money you had all went to Danny, I did manage to rescue some of it, but Danny blew the rest on whatever the hell he did for three years.” Brian shrugged like it was no big deal. “Didn’t want to leave it at the house in case Danny got the house too. So just hid it in Amy’s attic.”

 “I like the sound of those numbers.” Beverly joked from the back. Jimmy was too shocked to say anything for a while.

Jimmy was grateful for the playful tone within the car, no one dwelled on what happened to Danny even the blood clinging to Brian was forgotten about. When they pulled up to their house thoughts of Danny had completely left him he had everything he needed and his brother played no part in it.  

Brian draped his arm around Jimmy’s shoulder walking back to the house. Beverly switched on the light in the living room.  

“All in favour of sleep now, sort whatever the fuck we’re going to do tomorrow?” Brian asked through a yawn.

“My kind of plan.” Beverly winked at him, she reluctantly pulled herself from the couch. “I’m taking a shower first I smell like a fuel pump.”

Brian spun Jimmy around to face him stealing a quick kiss making Jimmy blush. “You need a shower.”

“Will you join me?” Jimmy bit his lip a mischievous glint in his eye.

“I don’t know it’s awful small.” Brian began walking away letting Jimmy’s hand fall at the last possible second.

“Asshole.” Jimmy grinned as Brian sauntered away laughing.


	28. Chapter 28

Beverly was sitting on the couch eating cereal out of the box when Jimmy padded into the living room the next morning. He stretched his arms above his head and sat down beside her.  
“Sleep okay?” Jimmy asked her, her attention was on the TV watching the news.  
“Uh huh, once you and Brian stopped fucking.” She turned to glare at him, Jimmy shoved her playfully making her cackle. She offered him the box of cereal as she turned her attention back to the TV.  
“Beckett Ryan, President of the RPU today announced he would be increasing his staff and ensuring twenty four hours patrolling of the streets of Baltimore. The news comes after several reports of feral attacks on residents. We have footage here showing a woman believed to be known as Freddie Lounds attacking police last night after murdering a yet to be identified male, some viewers may find the following images disturbing.”  
Beverly raised her hand to her mouth in shock as Freddie jumped out of nowhere onto a man in his early forties, knocking him to the ground in one swoop, immediately clawing and pulling away his flesh with her teeth, she was unrecognisable, as she threw her head back the blood running down her chin as she devoured the meat. The next scene showed the RPU taking her out with one shot to the skull. Beverly turned away the tears already falling down her face.  
“That guy…” Jimmy said slowly.  
“We should have stopped her.” Beverly ignored Jimmy lost in her own thought.  
“That was my therapist.” Jimmy was wide eyed, watching the station repeat the same scenes over and over. “She ate Frederick Chilton.” Jimmy had to say it out loud to make it real.   
“She didn’t want to stay with us.” Jimmy said turning to Beverly who had tears running down her face.   
“She became a monster anyway.” Beverly’s voice sounded distant, as she wiped the tears from her face.   
“Do you think it was coincidence, or did she go after him?” Jimmy asked but Beverly was too lost in thought.   
“What did I miss?” Brian laid down beside Jimmy letting his head rest on his lap.  
“They got Freddie.”  
“Son of a bitch.”   
“She ate my therapist.” Jimmy told him, pointing at the TV. Brian instead grabbed the remote switching the TV off, he didn’t want to see it.   
“Okay.” He breathed out sitting up slowly. “What are we going to do?”   
“We need coolers for the meat.” Beverly reminded them and they both nodded their heads.  
“We just drive until we’re safe, we have enough money to get buy. Somewhere that lifers aren’t burning every house on the block.” Jimmy told them.  
“Okay we need supplies and then we’ll go.”   
“What about this house?”   
“I think we should burn it, leave all trace of us behind. Burn all our reanimated papers.”  
“Get new identities.”   
“Yes!” Brian pointed at her grinning. “There’s no reason why not, look at us we’re younger healthier than we’ve ever been, sure we got to eat some questionable meat from time to time but we can do this.” Brian finished his pep talk and Beverly was already up shouting over her shoulder she was going to find her papers.   
“You okay?” Brian finally asked noticing how quiet Jimmy had gone.  
“We’re just going to burn our house?” Brian wrapped his arms around Jimmy and kissed his face, nudging him with his nose to look at him.   
“I don’t need this house Jim, I just need you.”   
Jimmy looked around the house, before settling his eyes on Brian and pressing his lips to his. “I love you.”  
“Okay I found them,” Beverly announced walking back in with her papers. “Oh wait did I spoil a moment?” She pulled a face at them.  
“I love you too.” Brian kissed Jimmy back ignoring Beverly completely.  
“Get me the sick bucket.” She threw several cushions at them until they stopped.   
They packed what they needed and Brian made several stops to get food and coolers to store the meat in, cramming it all in the car. Beverly was studying a map trying to figure out the best place for them to go. The TV was playing to itself the news still on, lifers giving their opinions about brainers what they believed was the best solution to the problem. Jimmy was making Will Graham sandwiches in the kitchen his liver, sliced with onions and pickles.   
“Hey Jimmy, isn’t that Abigail’s father?” Beverly called, making Jimmy stop what he was doing, he bagged the last sandwich and put it in the cooler bag alongside the rest of them. He walked into the living room to watch the screen. He had only seen Abigail’s father once but he recognised the face on screen it was definitely his bitter face screaming in the crowd. Waving his gun and throwing fire bombs into random houses. The news cut to a scene of him dragging a brainer from his house by the scruff of his collar, dropping him in the street screaming obscenities at him. Watching the man beg until he shot him point blank in the face. Jimmy’s breath caught in his throat, the scenes began to replay and Jimmy couldn’t watch it again. He hadn’t forgotten about Abigail and now he knew what this man was capable of he couldn’t leave without paying him a visit. He switched the TV off turning to look at Beverly who was disgusted by the TV.   
“We need to make one stop before we leave.” He turned to Beverly a slow grin sliding onto his face.  
“Yes we do.”


	29. Chapter 29

Even though most of his memories of living at the house hadn’t come back to Jimmy it still hurt to watch it burn, he would have stood all night watching the blaze if Brian hadn’t took his hand and led him to the car. He kept his eyes on the flames until they were nothing more than embers in the distance.

It was midnight by the time they got to the Hobb’s house, most of the rioters had left the streets to take to the woods where the reanimated were now using the cover of darkness to flee. They parked the car and waited, waited for the last light to be switched off in the house. Beverly had a crow bar in her hand, holding it closely to her chest as Jimmy helped her out of the car holding a weapon of his own.

This was redemption it was revenge as they broke the lock on the back door and stepped into the kitchen, they held their positions still as they waited for any noise. They needed to take their time heading up the stairs but then they heard it, the rattle coming from below their feet. It happened again a thick heavy smack of chains hitting the wall, they looked at each confused, trying to assess whether they should investigate.

Brian motioned with his head to follow his movement as he crept through the kitchen until they reached the basement, Jimmy watched as Brian grabbed the key hung on the wall and slowly opened the door, they looked down at the stairs and the stench hit them so hard they stumbled backwards, freezing at the noise they made. They waited until it passed, until silence reigned again. They covered their faces as they took the stairs carefully, watching their feet, the stench clung to their skin, making it itch their eyes watering as the smell overpowered them.

Jimmy pulled the cord hanging from the ceiling embracing the room with light, then they saw her, chained to the wall like a wild animal, only she wasn’t capable of fighting she had neither the strength nor the emotional capacity to do anything.

“Abigail?” Jimmy wasn’t sure he spoke at all, the words quiet and unsure. He thought she was gone had been handed over to the RPU, relief flooded him for a second before it turned to bile. He crept closer to the rotting figure its head hung low the chains rattling at the smallest movement. Maggots collected at her feet, as her skin peeled away from her, her bone showing through her knees, she had just been left here, left to fade away and be forgotten about. Jimmy knelt down beside her, trying not to let the discomfort show on his face.

“Abigail, do you remember me?” He knew she couldn’t speak her bottom jaw was clinging to her with every intention of not leaving, but it was a losing the battle. Jimmy felt tears sting his eyes as he turned to see Beverly kneel down beside him, she gently took Abigail’s hand in hers, ignoring the thick putrid blood on her fingers.

“Would the meat help?” Beverly asked Jimmy, not taking her eyes off Abigail who was trying to raise her head.

“I don’t know, she looks too far gone.” Abigail had never been given any meat, she wasn’t feral just decomposing.

“I’ll go get some from the cooler, it’s worth a shot. I’m not leaving her here.” Beverly told them, she let Abigail’s hand drop as she stood up. “I’ll be as quick as I can.”

Jimmy watched her go, Brian hadn’t moved from where he was standing, looking too shocked to acknowledge what he was seeing was actually real. He felt something land by his feet making him look up, it was a sandwich from the cooler bag Brian had around his shoulder. Jimmy ripped it open and pulled the meat from the bread, feeding it to Abigail who was too weak to fight off the action. He held her head back the meat slipping down her throat, she lacked the ability to chew once it was gone he didn’t have to wait long before Abigail was holding her head up by herself. Running a tongue slowly along her lips being coaxed back from the dead. Brian threw the rest over, Jimmy taking them to pieces and handing the meat over to Abigail.

“Eat it slowly.” He told her as she grabbed handfuls of the chunks of meat and swallowed them down without chewing. “You’re okay now.” He told her and hoped he wasn’t lying, he held her hand as the tremors began building in her body. His focus was on her looking into her eyes, trying to reassure her he was here for here, they all were. He was about to turn to look at Brian, get him to come sit down beside him but it was too late. The gun had gone off and his movements to slow to react. Watched as the crimson bled through Brian’s shirt colouring where the bullet struck him, as Brian crumpled to the floor.

“Don’t fucking move.” The voice told him, Jimmy froze, he had Abigail protected behind him but his eyes were on Brian, at the way the blood trickled on the cement floor. His body shook as he fought to stay still. “Get away from her.” He motioned with his gun for Jimmy to move but he stayed where he was, ignoring the words. “I said get the fuck away from her.” Hobbs said it calmly but the gun pointed at Jimmy’s face meant he wasn’t joking around. He started to walk down the stairs, stepping over Brian’s body, making Jimmy tense up.

“You gonna tell me what you’re doing here before I blow your brains out.”

Jimmy kept his eyes focused on Hobbs, his hand behind his back slowly reaching for his bat, his fingers crawling inch by inch until he found what he was looking for. Hobbs stepped closer, the gun now pointed at Jimmy’s chest. “Answer the fucking question.”


	30. Chapter 30

Jimmy had a brief second of fighting the monster inside of him or letting it escape him, the last remaining shreds of humanity he clung to left, as his neck made a sickening snap, his eyes became dark and zeroed in on Hobbs, watched as the man tried not to let the fear show on his face. Jimmy felt his hands grab the gun aimed as his chest and squeezed it hard, until piece by piece it began crumbling in his fingers like dust trickling onto the ground. Hobbs shook trying to ease himself back but Jimmy was up on his feet lunging at his neck, shoving Hobbs to the ground his neck already slicing through the carotid artery letting the blood fill his mouth, his hands ripping him to pieces, Hobbs screams filling his ears only edging the monster within Jimmy to work fast, claw harder he needed his skin underneath his fingernails.

“Jimmy!” He neck snapped back, his pupils dilating back into place, the blood dripping down his mouth as he looked at Beverly shocked on the stairs. He immediately left Hobbs writing on the floor in pain, blood pillowing out of his neck as he grasped to keep it under control but it was no use it fell through his fingers, dancing away from him.

Jimmy shakily threw himself down beside Brian, tears falling down his face as he clung to Brian who was still in Jimmy’s arms.  “Please Brian, please.” Jimmy sobbed holding him tightly.

Beverly watched for a moment tears flooding her eyes as she realised Abigail was still chained to the wall staring terrified at her father. Beverly saw the keychain around Hobb’s neck and knew it was the key to the locks, she ripped it from his neck slicing it off clean. The gasps cut dead. She stepped over his body and leaned down in front of Abigail. “Listen, I’m taking you to the car and you need to wait.” Beverly was trying to remain calm, trying to block out Jimmy’s cries, not to look behind her she needed to focus on one thing at a time. “Do not scream, don’t run, please trust me here.” Beverly tried to force a smile but it came out a sob and Abigail reached for her hand nodding her agreement. Beverly undid the locks as quickly as she could. Beverly took her hand and helped her stand, gave her a moment to appreciate being stood up. Abigail gave her a small nod she was ready to get the hell out of the basement and Beverly led her away.

“Brian, you can’t leave me I just found you again.” Jimmy begged, his voice erratic, he had Brian clung to his chest, willing him to wake up. He couldn’t find a pulse, the shot had pierced through his heart but Jimmy didn’t want to look. “Brian, please. I love you.” Everything Jimmy had suffered through was nothing to how he felt now, he finally understood what Brian meant, every time he spoke about losing Jimmy, the look that fell on his face. Jimmy felt every piece of his break, he had nothing left to fight for. His light, his love was gone.

“Jimmy.” Beverly approached him cautiously, Jimmy sat shaking his head clinging to Brian, his stuttered sobs echoing through the basement. There was no one else in the house, Abigail told Beverly her mother had disappeared and she didn’t like to think where to. “We need to leave Jim, before anyone shows up.” Her words were falling on deaf ears as Jimmy rocked silently, whispering over and over into Brian’s ear. Beverly couldn’t watch she hung her head, tears dropping on the floor mixing with Brian’s blood. “Jim, we can’t get caught not after all this, we need to go now.” Beverly wiped her eyes, trying not to get frustrated, Abigail was waiting in the car with a trunk full of human meat, and the noise that they had all made was beginning to attract attention.

“Jimmy,” Beverly tried to reach for him but he shoved her away. She snatched her hand away as if she had been burned. “I had to leave Alana behind after what they did to her, I know how you feel Jimmy.”

“You don’t fucking know anything.” Jimmy snapped. “Brian is the love of my life not some fucking crush.”

Beverly shook her head sadly, trying not to let the words affect her she knew this anger wasn’t aimed at her but it still hurt. “I didn’t know her as long as you’ve known Brian, but I still loved her Jimmy.” She let the tears fall again.

“Just go.” He told her, not looking at her he was running his hands through Brian’s hair, his body still felt warm in his arms but he knew it meant nothing.

“I can’t leave you here, I’m not letting them take you Jimmy you think Brian would want that?” Beverly sighed she couldn’t take being in the basement any longer, it was closing in on her needed to get out, needed Jimmy to get moving.

“We’ll take him with us.” Beverly stood up already moving, Jimmy looked at her puzzled. “Grab his arm.” She instructed and Jimmy remained where he was. “Look you won’t leave him behind so we’ll take him, anything to get us away from here.” Beverly shoved Jimmy hard to get a response and then he was up moving, they heaved Brian up from the floor, throwing an arm around their shoulder and dragging him up the stairs. It was still dark outside but they needed to do this quick, they heaved his body across the street, stopping to see if anyone was following their movements. Abigail sat horrified in the front seat, shaking she kept her gaze straight in front of her. They laid Brian out on the back seat, Jimmy sitting down beside him clinging to him again as Beverly slammed the car doors shut.

 

Beverly made quick work of setting the house on fire, she light the match and took a deep breath, walking away as the flames took over. She remembered to grab the meat she had taken in the house before all hell broke loose, letting Abigail hold it something to do with her hands, as Beverly floored the car, the quicker they left Baltimore the better.

“I’m sorry.” Abigail said after the sobs of Jimmy became unbearable, Beverly wished the car had a radio to at least make this more bearable her heart was broke too but she needed to stay strong for Jimmy.

“It’s not your fault,” Beverly told her.

“You should have just left me.”

“That wasn’t going to happen, you’re safe now okay.” Beverly gave her the best smile she could manage. “You’ll want to sleep soon, don’t fight it okay. I’ll explain everything once we’re out of here.” Abigail gave her a teary nod biting her bottom lip, emotions were fighting all at once to return to her, she wasn’t sure how to feel, she knew she was exhausted and followed Beverly’s advice of closing her eyes and letting go.

Beverly let the sunrise warm her face, dry her tears, she drove until the car ran out of gas, she pulled over to fill up the tank with one of the cans of fuel they had. Abigail was still asleep, she didn’t look at Jimmy or Brian it would break the last clinging shreds of hope she had.

Jimmy had clung to Brian all night and had no intention of letting him go, he could feel anything wasn’t sure if his own heart was even beating anymore. When he closed his eyes he saw Brian waking up, a smile playing on his lips but the taste of Hobb’s blood in Jimmy’s mouth ripped him away and slapping him with the harsh reality.

“Jim…Jimmy?”

Jimmy turned to look at Abigail who had turned around in her seat, she was holding a chunk of meat in her hand a once that had defrosted overnight. He could see Beverly outside resting on the car, giving herself some space. Jimmy let the grip ease around Brian, letting him sit back on the seat. He took the meat from Abigail letting it sit in his hands, staring at it for a while. It wouldn’t hurt to try but he couldn’t rest all hope on this it was the only option he had left. He ripped pieces of it up with his hands and began forcing the meat through Brian’s mouth tilting his head back until the pieces disappeared. He kept going until all the meat was gone and Jimmy waited, and waited.

Beverly returned to the car, she had been watching Jimmy feed Brian the meat and hoped like hell something would happen, but Brian remained motionless. She wiped her eyes again exhaling roughly as she got back into the car. Jimmy was pleading with Brian to wake up, why wasn’t it working?

Beverly drove a few more hours until pulling the car over.

“Abigail why don’t you go get some air, I’ll be out in a bit.”

Abigail undid her seatbelt and gave Beverly a smile before exiting the car. Beverly watched until Abigail was walking alongside fields not far from the car. She turned to face Jimmy who looked shell shocked. His eyes staring straight ahead of him, focused on nothing his fingers digging into Brian’s shirt.

“Jimmy, what do you want to do?” Beverly moved around more until she could grab Jimmy’s hand he didn’t fight her off this time and let his fingers be intertwined with his. His eyes finally snapped to hers, a tear rolling down his face.

“I can’t leave him.” He tried not to sob out the words, but he did it anyway. Beverly squeezed his hand. “It’s your decision what we do, but you know we can’t keep him here.”

Jimmy nodded slowly at her, the tears dripping on their linked hands. “We should burry him?” He asked her unsure, the pain in his chest was threatening to consume him and he wasn’t sure if what he was doing was right anymore. Beverly felt the tears spill down her cheeks.

“There’s a cemetery nearby we could—“Beverly trailed off not wanting to say it, but Jimmy nodded closing his eyes trying to escape reality again.

“I’ll give you some time before we need to go.” Beverly squeezed his hand before leaving the car to catch up with Abigail.

Jimmy wrapped Brian in his arms again burrowing his head on his shoulder. “When everything had settled down and we were safe we would have finally gotten married, I already promised Beverly she could be my best man you’d have to find your own.” Jimmy sniffed through his tears. “We would have gotten a house and you could have opened a store, you always wanted to own one although you could never decide on a theme, was it a music store or a bait store.” Jimmy smiled to himself, trying to image the warmth of Brian’s body was not just his own, the thudding in his ears was just his own heart.  “We would get Locard back from your sister and we would be set, no more running just us.” Jimmy squeezed his eyes shut, the sobs erupting from his chest. “I love you so much Brian.”

“I love you too.”

Jimmy didn’t open his eyes the words sounded real but he knew they were in his head, if he just kept them closed he would be fine. He felt fingers take hold of his face and his eyes finally snapped open.

“Were you really going burry me, and I thought I was the asshole.” Brian grinned slowly, Jimmy lunged at him crashing their mouths together, both their tears mixing together as they smiled at each other. Jimmy pulled back to touch Brian’s face, making sure he was actually there.

“Beverly!” He shouted, until she came running. “He’s alive, please tell me he’s alive.” Beverly looked to Brian who ran a hand over his body ensuring that yes he did have a pulse again and Beverly grabbed him into a hug pulling Jimmy in too. He winched at the movement, his body still ached all over.

“Yes,” She cried “Took you long enough.” She smacked his arm.

“Love you too Beverly.” He told her, Beverly pulled him into another hug.

“I need to get Abigail then we’ll go.” She gave them a huge smile and dashed out of the car. Jimmy scattered kisses over Brian’s face making him laugh, placing his hand over the familiar beating of his chest.

“Don’t do that again.” Jimmy warned him, Brian pulled him closer kissing him until the need to breathe hit them both. “I’ll try.”

“Okay, keep it PG, teenager getting into the car now.” Beverly told them, opening the car door so Abigail could get back. She jumped when she saw Brian.

“Are you…is he?” Abigail didn’t know where to look or who to ask. Beverly started the car giving Abigail a smile.

“I’m fine.” Brian told her, Abigail gave him a polite smile back, brushing her hair behind her ears before turning to face forward. “Good.”

Jimmy couldn’t take his eyes from Brian, couldn’t wipe the smile from his teary face either. Brian kept touching Jimmy’s face to reassure him he was there beside him, he wasn’t dreaming it.

They drove until night when Beverly and Abigail switched places with Brian and Jimmy, they held hands whilst Jimmy drove. They drove until they were safe, until no more fires littered the streets. Until their pasts were so far behind them they didn’t need to worry anymore. Jimmy had everything he needed, he glanced a look at Brian who gave him a sleepy grin.

“I love you Honey.”

“I love you B.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you read it all thank you so much, i hope you liked it. Come say hi on tumblr @ [thisjabroni](http://thisjabroni.tumblr.com/)  
> There is a mixtape for the fic [Here](http://8tracks.com/thisjabroni/brain-stew)  
> Also the incredibly talented [Maddy](http://warning-dookie.tumblr.com/) drew the most amazing piece to go with the fic you can check that out [Here](http://warning-dookie.tumblr.com/post/97055400365/from-thisjabronis-awesome-preller-zombie-au-fic)


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